Jon and Kate and the Elephant in the Room

I always tell my husband that the best gift we can give each other is a set of parents who are happily married. If that means having to ask my parents to watch the kids for a weekend, or putting the kids to bed early so we can chat,than that is what has to happen.

I think you hit the nail on the head, a marriage needs to be able to stand alone without having "children" as some sort of crutch like Jon and Kate do. They obviously need to focus on each other for a while, stop being victims of their own choices and realize that there are other ways to support a family and live a life. If they have been taken in by the brite lights of fame, then I feel sorry for them, but more sorry for the children.

Reply

Last night's show was painful to watch. Yes, we all have been quick to criticize Kate on how she yells at Jon and ragging on Jon for his supposed trysts, but when you see a couple on the verge of breaking up, you ask yourself what could help them. I think Rachel is exactly right; they can't be good parents without having a solid relationship. In addition I think money is the other factor in this family drama. Remember how "normal" they were during the first season? They lived in a normal-sized house, dealt with normal family issues, and took the children on normal outings such as the pumpkin patch or a Christmas tree farm. Yet four seasons later they live in a million dollar estate, and "outings" these days are lavish trips to Disneyland or Hawaii. What's wrong with this picture? I think, money can't buy happiness after all... Hopefully they'll realize this and act accordingly before it is too late!

Reply

It is easier said than done to "put the book tour on hold and shut down the cameras...". There are contracts and bills. Who is going to buy that house in this economy so they can move into a smaller one? Do you buy a smaller one before the divorce papers are filed? Can She count on Jon for enough child support if all of this goes away? It is easy to judge being on the outside but while you are living a life crisis like this, you are just trying to keep you head afloat. They are in the middle of this still.
I can see how Jon got to the point he is at with the loss of identity, but I would bet money that he kept much of it inside until he imploded and started the escaping behaviors. I have news for him, making "friends" with 24 year old girls is not innocent behavior. Affairs begin somewhere and even without sex it can still be an affair. Taking responsibility for his choices is a weak way to make himself feel better. She has made her own mistakes. I just think they came from a different place than what his. I think the show becoming their job and Jon losing his( he said quit but I thought he was laid off?) made them lose their way at lightening speed. Hard lessons learned.

Reply

People...I'm sorry, I don't mean to be cold or cruel, but why do we care about these people?? There are so many people out there in our own towns that go through mounds of pain. People that have to watch their sick children die or suffer, a wonderful mother that I know is dying of cancer and all she can say is that she just wants to be around to see her boys graduate high school...strong people who deal with their adversities in courageous ways, not looked at by the world via the media, just folks living their lives and trying to cope....then you get these two, he's cheating, she's apparently a horrible employer who can't keep help...who really cares? They have money so they have security, can't say that for most people today...why do Americans sit at home and watch such stupidity, then feel sorry for them. Their kids? Sure, I have two and I wouldn't want them to be in pain, but these two morons asked for it....they took their show on the road and that's where they are...I could care less.

Reply

I think it's time we all did these 8 kids and their parents a favor......the only thing we viewers can actually do to help. Turn off the TV folks, or find something else to watch. Maybe TLC will be forced to do the merciful thing and cancel this "too realistic" show, turn off the cameras, take down the lights and let this family heal. There are some things we don't need to know about and this marriage is one of them.

Reply

Excuse me but this is a parenting blog right? Has anyone ever tallied how much money it costs to raise kids...I mean...has anyone here? I have four boys. It is freaking expensive. If I could get a tv show to follow me around and detail my fairly mundane life AND PAY ME to do it...hell yes. I cannot imagine the financial stress these people were under before their show. If the show gives them an ounce of financial security wherein otherwise there would BE NONE then BRING ON THE CAMERAS. I don't give a crap really about these people. Idon't know why anyone even watches the show. But, I admire them for getting their family some financial stability despite all the crap. Hell, they could have shrugged their shoulders and gone on welfare assistance or something. Let's just lay off. No one with half a life really cares.

Reply

I think she totally sold out. It's pretty sad, that she has her children for sale, so she can live in a luxurious home. I use to really enjoy watching this show, but now, I just don't know what to think.

I'll honestly be surprised if the show makes it another year.

And John, needs to fine him self a set of balls, and put the warden (Kate) in her place.

So sad, because I use to love this show.

Reply

I don't care if they are cheating on each other or not. I don't care how much they are getting paid. I don't believe that children should be reality stars - period. The show needs to be cancelled just for that fact alone.

Reply

I feel for Jon, poor guy has to do everything she says! Kate seems like she is over controlling and leads the shows and doesnt seem like she is too interested in the children at all. Kate i think let this show take over her life and now is a celbertiy and not a mother. I think they both need to take steps back and look what their life turned out to be, it is all worth the fame and fortune. I would choose not but others would think otherwise i guess.

Reply

You could tell that Jon is tired of doing the show and needs to get out of the house and back to work. Kate needs to wise up to the fact the her husband needs to work out side of the show and maybe if she does it will save her marriage. Kate has said that she loves doing the show and maybe they can do a show called "Kate and the kids" and leave Jon to have his space and work. She is wanting to keep doing the show and it will ruin her marriage because all she sees is the dollar signs.

Sandy

Reply

Agreed, but kids deserve more than just an "intact family" - they need a loving, constructive, tender, happy, stable life in which to grow. And they are watching (and learning) how we treat each other!! Therefore, parents need to be extra vigilant by staying close and showing tenderness to each other every day, just as you advocate on your "Keep the Spark Alive" "Life is Like" video. I know, some days are more "loving" than others, and maybe not all marriages can last, but to be crass: if you are going to mate with someone and bring children into the world, you better be 100% committed to at least trying to make it work, no matter what you face as a couple.

I always used to prefer Jon and Kate over the Duggars (whom I admire but their colossal, "perfect" family is hard for me to relate to). Jon and Kate always seemed to "keep it real," but my sense is that they've forgotten why they are in this together. It's really sad they can't try harder to salvage this, not even for their kids.

Reply