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Jon & Kate Plus 8 Recap - Because We Can't Look Away

Filed under: Celeb Parents

TLC aired two new episodes of "Jon & Kate Plus 8" last night; in the first half hour, Kate took the kids to Baltimore's Charm City Cakes for her birthday, while Jon went snowboarding, and in the second half hour, Kate and Mady went to San Diego and Jon stayed home with the rest of the kids. In between, the Gosselins chatted with the camera, while sitting as far apart as was humanly possible on the love seat, trying not to accidentally touch each other. Or make eye contact. Or acknowledge that the other one was even there.

Maybe I exaggerate. But not much.

Kate Gosselin of Jon and Kate Plus 8

    Rumors are swirling about Jon and Kate Gosselin's marriage. Is it over? Or is this just the stuff of reality TV? It's hard to know what's true, but it's even harder to look away.

    David Livingston, Getty Images

    Do you ever wonder what life would be like if you had one more child? How about two more? How about SIX more?

    Four years ago, Jon and Kate Gosselin went from being parents of two to parents of eight, and their lives have never been the same.

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    Today we all have a window into that life on TLC's Jon and Kate Plus 8. And of course, part of peeking into someone else's life is hypothesizing how we might do things differently or better, because it's always easy to imagine what you would do in someone else's shoes.

    What is harder to imagine is what it would really be like to walk in those other shoes -- what's it like to wake up every morning and be Kate Gosselin? ParentDish had a chance to ask her just that recently.

    TLC.Discovery.com

    In a normal week, the Gosselins have a television crew in their house about half the time, which is a lot, if you think about it. And while they will occasionally opt out of filming specific moments with their kids, the Gosselins have no editorial control over the show -- what you see is what you get, packaged by a team of folks at Discovery and TLC. But, Kate says, this is reality TV, and it accurately reflects life at the Gosselin house; nothing is pre-planned or made up. "We don't have time to memorize scripts," she jokes.

    I believe that.

    "We set out to show the truth," Kate says, "I couldn't watch it if it weren't true." What you see, in every televised moment, is precisely what is happening -- no stage directions or do-overs. This is life at the Gosselin house.

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    Kate Gosselin has gotten quite a bit of flak, both from the media and from viewers, for the way she treats her husband; the two are often shown bickering during the show. Kate says the criticisms don't bother her; she doesn't Google herself or make a practice of reading about herself on or off line. "Everyone has an opinion," she says, "and I'm only paying attention to my own." But she does admit that the way the show is edited affects how people see her family and her marriage. "If Jon and I have three spats over a two day period, they're going to edit it to make it look like those happened in the 22 minute period." The show is just a small slice of her family's life, after all.

    TLC.Discovery.com

    Kate is clearly focused not on what goes on outside her family but on her children. Her goal, she says, is to treat each child like an only child -- a hard thing to do when you're the mom of eight. "I hold myself to a very high standard," she says. At the same time, though, she's not trying to be perfect, or even to appear perfect to viewers of the show. She's just living her life.

    And yes, she's living it with television cameras in her house, but it's still her real life. Kate says that while the experience of being on television has changed her life, it hasn't changed who she is. She says the same about having eight children -- "It's hard to live through what we have lived through and not change. We are the same -- it's how people treat us" that is different.

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    One of the hardest things about her family, Kate says, is the noise; there are days when the older girls, Cara and Mady, come home from school and their reports about what they have done are drowned out by the noise of the sextuplets. More than anything, she says, she longs for peace and quiet -- otherwise, she would not change a thing about her life.

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    Kate finds the humor in her life -- recently, she partnered with P&G to help promote some of their brands, including Bounty paper towels, which she refers to as "my weapon of choice." She also laughs about the end of nap time at the Gosselin house; the sextuplets are four now and no one, Kate says, naps any more. But it's a rare night that the family gets through dinner without someone dozing off at the table. Recently, Jon said, "I think we can kiss goodbye ever having a family dinner again." A good night, Kate said, is when the kids push their plates out of the way before they fall asleep.

    You have to laugh about that, and Kate Gosselin does.

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    The Gosselins have a strong faith in God; they are often seen on the show wearing t-shirts with scripture on them and attending church. But despite the fact that the show doesn't highlight their faith, the Gosselins see it as an opportunity to share what they believe. Their website, The Gosselin 10, includes prayers and devotionals, and Jon and Kate travel around speaking to various churches and groups about their life and faith. The show, Kate says, has given them this opportunity to share what they believe.

    Amazon.com

    And for the Gosselins, being on television is about opportunity, not fame. The show has opened a variety of doors for them; Kate and Jon both work from home, which makes their life as parnents of eight more manageable. But it's not easy by any means -- there are days, Kate says, when she and Jon work until midnight.

    Kate has three pieces of advice for other parents. "Every morning, before my feet hit the floor," she says, "I pray for strength, just enough to get through that day." She reminds parents that a sense of humor can get you through nearly everything -- laugh, she says, don't cry. And finally, the most important lesson of all: "Always remember that bedtime comes, every single day."

    sixgosselins.com



The first half hour was a funny balance of the old "Jon & Kate" and the new. The kids make birthday cakes for Kate, but instead of whipping them up at home with help from Jon, they are assisted by the Food Network's Ace of Cakes crew. There's no pretense that this is a normal day in the life of an unusual family; it's a reality TV outing that only TLC could pull off. But the show is up front about this -- we see the cameras and the sound crew, and Kate talks about how much she loves Duff and what a big fan she is. And she mentions her book at least once, of course. Because it's about baking! And they're in a bakery! And she has a book to promote!

At the same time, though, Kate Gosselin is still the old Kate, who isn't sure she wants the kids to get dirty or eat sugar. When the Charm City staff explain that each child will be decorating an individual cake, Kate gets a little nervous; she talks about her fears that they will make a mess. At the end of the decorating, the kids are cramming their mouths with fondant and icing and she's clearly having to take some deep breaths to keep from losing it. But as Charm City's Mary Alice points out, no one has a meltdown, and the kids seem to be enjoying the day. It's just like all those previous seasons where we rolled our eyes because hey, kids are supposed to make a mess! Especially with cake.

And where's Jon while Kate is loading the kids with sugar (and talking about the fact that she's writing a book on baking)? He's snowboarding, which he loves (the voiceover tells us) because he can be all by himself, away from the TV crews. And yes, there's a TV crew following him down the slope, but it's easy to forget that since what we're thinking about is how he's probably glad to be away from his family.

Oh come on. You know that crossed your mind too.

In the second episode, Kate takes Mady for a girls' weekend at the spa and Jon hangs out at home with Kara and the sextuplets (which leaves us wondering if every episode this season will consist of Jon and Kate going off separately and then reuniting on the sofa to ignore each other). Jon does fairly normal dad stuff with the kids: They ride their bikes and take a walk in the woods and assemble the swing set. And Alexis falls down and bites through her lip and has to go to the pediatrician, and Adan breaks the toilet lid and Jon has to glue it back together, which all sounds pretty much like how things go at my house when I'm out of town, honestly.

See, it is realistic!

Kate and Mady take in a day at the spa, with manicures and pedicures and a fancy salad for lunch. Kate says some touching things about wanting to enjoy this time with her kids before they grow up and go away, and then the scene cuts back to Jon and the little kids playing on their new playset, because those kids are super cute and that's really what we want to see. Or maybe we just want the contrast between Jon wrestling with power tools and Kate poking her toes in the sand because TLC wants us to keep wondering how this snowboarder dude and the pampered princess with the high-maintenance hair are ever going to make it.

Stay tuned.

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