Are Co-Ed Dorms a Good Idea?

A person's brain does not fully mature until they are 25, and their hormones are probably still in a state of full or semi-raging activity. Just because the law says that at 18 a person is considered an adult, doesn't make them one and they don't suddenly become able to make intelligent and adult decisions. Even then if they have not been brought up with moral standards, self respect, and knowing the dire consequences and life long effects of doing wrong, an idea such as co ed dorming would not be in their best interest. Why put temptation and distraction in the path of a student who's mind should be concentrating solely on their studies. But if parents are okay with it and want to turn their kids' colleges into shack up havens, then why don't they just throw in kegs of booze, condoms, and then throw their kids to the lions?

Reply

ABSOLUTELY NOT ! NO STUDENT, MALE OR FEMALE, WOULD EVER "SHACK UP" ON MY DOLLAR !
WHAT IS THIS WORLD COMING TO, ANY HOW? STUPID IDIOTS ARE IN CARGE, SO IT SEEMS.

really? carge? some stupid idiots.

Reply

I don't see a problem with this. First, college students are adults, not children, so it is not up to anyone to babysit their actions. If that were the case the legal age 22 instead of 18. Now, if the parent is paying, that is a different story, the student would need to deal with the stipulations the parent lays out if they so chose to. However, I am currently a college student paying my own way, and I go to a school that doesn't allow overnight guests of the opposite sex on school nights. That is something that bothers me. I don't feel I should be told who can be in my room and when. And having coed rooms does not promote sex or pregnancy. People will have sex if they want to and no one can blame anyone but the individuals for their actions.

Reply

As a current college student I think this proposal is a pretty good idea. From my experience I also tend to get along better with guys rather than girls, so in my case I would definitely be in favor of this. Its not really that much of a difference whether or not guys and girls room together legally or not. College students are old enough to know right from wrong,good from bad,etc. I wish my school would go out on a limb and transform with the rest of the generation.

Reply

My college offers apartments for upper classmen to live in. There are two bedrooms in an apartment and two people to a room. If my school had this policy, it wouldn't be as difficult to find two other people to get one of the apartments with.

As for regular dorms, it is pretty much like this anyways. Men sleep in women's dorm rooms and vice versa. I agree with a comment that was written earlier. If two people of the opposite sex are living together, it doesn't mean they are having intimate relations. People who live together have the same chances of having sex as those who don't live together.

The fact of the matter is that people men and women alike in this situation just need to choose wisely and act responsible. It is pretty much the same as living in a house with several people men and women alike.

Reply

Ok, I see some of your points, but this seems to be becoming an issue of sex with a partner. Parents regardless of whether a boy lives with a girl or not, sex will happen. Did any of you go to college or remember what you did. Hell it took my dad till my junior year to finally come clean and admit he was no angel!!! Hell me and my roommate had the sock rule, sock on the knob your sleepin on the couch in the hall or findin a friend to stay with!! Instead of complaining about it talk to them about safe sex cause either way its gonna happen!! So this sex issue should be a mute subject on this issue, because either way it will happen. Arguements and breakups I understand, but if your a parent with a college kid, why do you talk to your child and discuss it with them, not just harp and complain about it, that makes them turn a deaf ear to you, talk to them like a person they will respect that more. I like the idea, and it gives people options, of living with someone they get along with, I don't agree if it just randomly partners you with someone, that should be same sex still, but if you chose to live with your best friend since you were 5 and she's a girl you should have that option...

Reply

I graduated Phi Beta Kappa with General and Departmental Honors from Vassar College, Poughkeepsie, New York in 1976. During my four years at Vassar, all of the dormitories except one (Strong House, which was reserved for women who wanted an all-female dorm), were co-educational, but while technically, student rooms were not, many ended up being so. Students (other than freshmen) also had the opportunity to live in on-campus housing, which consisted of The Townhouse and Terrace Apartments, which were co-educational, as I recall. While I never chose to cohabit with a member of the opposite sex (I'm gay, by the way), some of my friends did. To the best of my knowledge, it posed no problems of any significance.

Reply

Better set up a line item for birth control..it could be a very big expenditure..

Reply

The first day of my orientation people managed to have sex without there being Co-Ed dorm Rooms and an with an 11:00 curfew. This concept of Co-Ed dorm rooms isn't new and I know people it works for. Also who you room with is not set in stone. At my school you can switch rooms all year round. You can't prevent your kids from having sex once they leave your home for college (as my above point proves)--it just doesn't work. Parents just have to trust that they raised us right.

Reply

i remember this issue when i was in college. i had many friends who had stated that they wish they could room with someone of the opposite sex. i remember one time specifically when a gay friend of mine started to have problems with his straight roomate. the problem was do to the different sexualities and there were no other rooms that my friend could move into for a while. there were, however, females that had rooms to themselves and were willing to room with him. even though i suppose you could simply say it was a "learning experience" for the two guys (an unplesant one for my friend), it may have been much easier (and less drama) to simply let my friend share a room with a woman.

Reply

I have to agree with those who say, "Not on my dime".......

If any of my kids wanted to have a "co-ed" dorm room or apartment, they can pay for their own education and living expenses.

If I am paying for my kids' education and living expenses, I expect to have some input. I want their focus to be on doing well in their college classes [so they can attend the grad program of their choice] and not on the "roomies"...........

Reply

Where is this all leading? What about when the female gets
pregnant, will they petition the school to have the kid live in the
dorm with mom and dad? They haven't really thought this thing
thru and thru. They are creating a whole new set of problems that
has nothing to do with education. Can you imagine the number of
rapes that will occur, due to drinking. All this to satisfy the
the whims of a few trans gender student.

Reply

Ah, temptation...................I must have forgot the purpose of colleges, and universities. I always thought they were created so people could acquire an education, not to promote sexuial encounters.
The only way that two students of the opposite sex would deny any sexual contact would be if one was blind, and the other was completely handicapped. Who is kidding who? Let's keep our educational institutions exactly for what they were intended, EDUCATION ! If one wants to 'play', let them rent an off-campus apartment. College age youths can't be considered as 'adults'!
BOYS, keep your zippers UP, and GIRLS keep your panties on
(or wear a chastity belt)! ! ! ! !

An olde college grad.

Reply

For those of you saying having a roomie of the opposite sex would be distracting, I say why? How is it any more distracting then rooming with a friend of the same sex? Just because a guy and a girl room together doesn't mean you're not going to get any work or studying done. It's ridiculous to think that when a student goes to college they're going to be studying ALL the time. Come on now, they do need breaks every now and then. It also doesn't mean they're going to immediately jump each other and have sex because they live in the same dorm room. I mean come on that's just a bit ridiculous.

Also, I don't believe being over a certain age makes you any more mature enough to handle something like this. There are many kids 18 and below who have had to grow up and mature WAY faster than they should have because of rotten home situations, and there are many adults in their 30's, 40's and 50's who still act immature and irresponsible. It all depends on the individual student. If they think they can handle rooming with someone of the opposite sex that's their choice. If they don't like it during that time, they'll learn to live with it and use the experience as a life lesson. If the two are a couple and they break up then that's their bad decision and they'll have to grin and bear it until it's over since they made that choice.

Having coed rooms does not promote sex or pregnancy either. People will have sex if they want to and no one can blame anyone but the individuals for their choices and actions. If you're worried about your child living with someone of the opposite sex, then what does that say about your parenting? If you raised your child the right way then you should not be worried about this at all. If your child doesn't want to room with someone of the opposite sex then they don't have to, it's as simple as that

Reply

The University of Chicago IS NOT an ultra-conservative school when it comes to academic thought and lifestyle although their Business school could be thought of as conservative. The UC is very left of center in many ways although there are also groups of conservatives if you look hard enough. Deciding to allow co-ed dorms just goes to show you that people with high IQs in positions of authority can make foolish decisions just to please a small group. It certainly isn't proper nor is it civilized.

Reply

Pardon my ignorance, but are we talking about suite mates, or a male and female living in the same room? Living in a suite with members of the opposite sex seems like it would teach tolerance and hopefully respect for the opposite sex. Sleeping in the same room does sound like a recipe for discord if not disaster. I would not like my daughter living in a situation where a male was in the same room. I do not, nor does she by the way, wish to have a partially clad or naked male in her room. Those who choose to "shack up" I guess you would call it also run the risk of comitment issues. Is this a step 19-21 year olds are ready to make. Wouldn't it limit a part of the college experience...meeting and dating people that are interesting, fun, bright, sexy, or whatever? Isn't that part of the learning experience as well. And well, it just sounds kind of cheap in a way also. My daughters have graduated now, but I don't think I would foot the bill for this type of living arrangemant.

Reply

What does it "say about your parenting skills" I believe you phrased it....that is pretty much the type of immature thought process a lot of parents are concerned with when discussing this issue.

Reply

I think this is a great idea. If someone decides to room with their bf/gf it will give them a better idea of how that person really is, if they break up it just wasn't meant to be and I think that is better than waiting till college is over, getting married, live together for 2 months and then realizing what that person is really like so they can file for divorce in the first year of their marriage. If a girl want to live with a guy she should be able to choose so for herself. And to all those moms that don't want to put their daughters living with a guy because they will be having tons of sex and whatnot... They're going to do it either way. They don't have to have the guy living with them to sleep with them, and it all doesn't happen at night. Where's your daughter right now?

Reply

The Bible is the reason why I dn't believe in doing that.
My pastor staed one Bible study, "women shouldn't go over aman's house before marriage, nor should they live in the same house of a man before marriage, for it is sinful." So, I am doing whatever it takes to stay away from sin; although, I am not perfect.
Therefore, I am against womenand men living together while they aren't married. And I don't see myself doing so in the future, especially while on someone's campus.
That leads to sex before marriage, and or rape.
Sorry.

Reply