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Filed under: In The News, Amazing Parents, Breast-Feeding
Just six months ago, Robbie and Susan Goodrich of Marquette, Mich., were expecting their second child.
Now Robbie Goodrich is the single father of two young children as he mourns the death of his wife while some two dozen women visit his house in shifts to breast-feed his infant son.
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Nursing Moses
Robbie Goodrich, center, and his 6-month-old son Moses, surrounded by some of the women in the community who are wet nursing Moses, at Goodrich's home in Marquette, Michigan.
Susan Tusa, Detroit Free Pres / MCT
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Life turns on a dime, Goodrich realizes, but this crosses the border into surreal. "I've spent the past few months getting used to the fact that this is reality now," he said.
He certainly never expected to become famous. Yet his story has been written up in everything from his hometown newspaper, The Mining Journal, to the June 15 edition of People magazine. Reporters keep calling him for quotes. At least six television producers have approached him about starring in a reality show.
"It would be a really boring show," Goodrich said.
Besides, he said, there's no way he would be put his infant son, 2-year-old daughter, and 11-year-old stepdaughter through that media meat grinder. "It doesn't care who you are," Goodrich said in an interview with ParentDish. "You're just a commodity."
The idea of two dozen women taking turns breast-feeding a widower's baby is apparently a sensation.
But Goodrich said it all began in a blur. He and his wife were professors at Northern Michigan University. He taught history, and she taught modern languages and literature. Susan Goodrich died Jan. 11 from an amniotic fluid embolism after giving birth to their son, Charles Moses Martin Goodrich (called simply Moses).
No words can describe how he felt, Goodrich said. "It was pure blackness."
Both Goodrich and his wife were strong advocates of breast-feeding. Laura Janowski, a family friend who was already nursing her own 4-month-old daughter, asked if he would like her to breast-feed Moses as well. Almost instinctively, Goodrich said, he answered yes.
Marquette is a college town of about 20,000 on the shore of Lake Superior in what Goodrich said is not so much rural as "rugged." The community is close. Everyone knows everyone else -- or least knows someone who knows someone. Plus, as a professor, Goodrich has a high profile.
His story spread quickly. Susan Goodrich's best friend, Nicoletta Fraire, took charge of organizing the team. Now some 25 women drop by the house to either nurse Moses personally or provide pumped breast milk. They've become a community.
"They don't just drop by for five minutes and leave," Goodrich said. "These are loving, nurturing women. They're proud of what they're doing. They're proud of the community, and they're proud of their new micro-community."
Team member Carrie Fiocchi told the Savannah Morning News in Georgia on Aug. 17 she realizes Moses isn't her baby, but the bond is inescapable. "He definitely feels like family."
"I felt like I was doing this for Susan," team member Kyra Fillmore said in the same article. "It's really emotional because, while it's nice to hold a newborn, I think to myself, 'It shouldn't be me.'"
Although the women's love for his son touches him, Goodrich said it is bittersweet for him. "Every moment of joy has sorrow in it." He still grieves the loss of his wife, but tries to put on as brave a face as possible. "The crying goes on in private," he said.
He echoes Fillmore's feelings about the breast-feeding. "It's a reminder of the loss," he said. "They're doing something that Susan would do."
Goodrich said all the publicity makes him and the women in his newfound extended family a little uneasy -- especially him. "They're the ones doing something special."
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ReaderComments (Page 4 of 18)
12-11-2009 @ 1:22AM
Tleming said...Wow! To all you who think this is "nasty" or think he should just feed the baby formula please research the ingredients in formula... that is nasty! To those worried about hygiene and diseases, I'm quite sure he asked questions and had criteria to be met. Someone said something about breast infections being passed to baby. They do not at all and it is actually best to nurse a lot with an infection. It is best to nurse through all illnesses actually because it gives baby the antibodies to fight off those illnesses. Please get educated on Breastfeeding before commenting! I would be happy to have my child breastfed by numerous women rather than formula fed if anything ever happened to me:) To those who say its perverted, I think you have some serious perversion issues you need to come to terms with. They are just boobs and their sole purpose is for nurturing a child! Its you perverts who have made it anything other than that!
9-20-2009 @ 8:40PM
annmatranga said...I adopted my daughter at 4 days old when my biological son was 9 months old and was able to nurse them together. I'm so grateful for that experience and the bonding it gave us. She's 39 now, the mother of 2 children herself.
Reply
9-21-2009 @ 1:02AM
jz said...There is nothing like a woman's touch. Dad couldn't replace that in a million years. I'm sure this 'hands on' Dad is bonding with the child in other ways. It's also good that cheerful women are holding the baby. This baby is going to get off to a great start. He's surrounded by so much love... good for him and them.
Reply
9-20-2009 @ 8:32PM
P. said...It's like giving your baby "some 2 dozen" blood transfusions with un-tested blood. Breastfeeding is wonderful and clearly the best but not from all of these donors, the risk is too high. God bless this family.
Reply
9-20-2009 @ 9:35PM
ang said...Woman who are pregnant and receiving prenatal care have already taken tests checking for diseases. There is no reason that one of these women who are breastfeeding their own children has anything that could be passed through the breast milk to this child. This community is doing a wonderful thing to support Moses' parents values and belief in breast feeding.
9-20-2009 @ 9:44PM
gregsnewgirl said...Breast feeding does not transfer the same things that blood transfusions will!!
9-20-2009 @ 8:34PM
Sarah said...Spiritually, it's wrong. Only one woman should be breast feeding this child, not a harem. And the man in mourning doesn't look too down to me. Poor kid.
Reply
9-20-2009 @ 9:32PM
Connie said...Sarah says, "Spiritually it's wrong." What in the world does that mean??? Spiritually wrong??? It doesn't seem wrong to me in any area--especially spiritually. I'd like to know how you even came up with that idea. These women are using the mammary glands God gave them to feed one of His children so he will be healthy. There is absolutely nothing wrong with that--spiritually or otherwise. God's blessings to this little one, his family, and the nurturing women who are providing milk for him.
9-20-2009 @ 9:06PM
kay said...Sarah, what a downer. This man has been grieving for 6 months, did you read that he stated he still cries in private? Why is it wrong spiritually? I think it's a beautiful thing that so many women are helping this man with his little boy. Beautiful story. Lighten up a little.
9-20-2009 @ 9:29PM
Marsha said...WHAT???!!!How is this spiritually wrong.Please tell me in the bible where it says though shall not breastfeed someone else's child.That's what spirituality is all about.Helping each other.Like God helped others.
9-20-2009 @ 9:31PM
Alex said...What a load of crap. Spiritually it's wrong? Uh we're living the modern world hunny. There is nothing wrong at all with this at all. I bet you frown on single mothers you bitch. These woman are all be unselfish and helping this poor man.
So you're saying he's happy about this? Happy about having his wife die? Ugh...you make me want to hit somebody. These woman are all most likely mothers and wives.
As to those who say this is unsafe, I understand your concern, but if this guy cares so much about having his child drink breast-fed milk then I'm sure he would check to see if the doners are safe. I mean if a women had AIDS, why would she try to give a child that? I can't picture anyone who would.
9-21-2009 @ 12:44AM
Anita said...I think it is amazing. And for his name to be Moses too. I would do it only if the baby was related to me. But, God Bless all of them.
9-20-2009 @ 9:50PM
Diana said...Spiritually wrong???? Are you kidding me????????? If anything, amongst pure caring and genuine concern for the baby's health...this is the most spiritually "correct" thing for these women to do, and for the father to accept their blessed gift graciously, is how God intended us to care for one another. The people in the Upper Peninsula of Michigan are just that way...amazing.
9-20-2009 @ 8:35PM
Terri said...This man is a college professor, and I cannot imagine he would not ensure his child is fed a safe supply of breast milk. It seems like every time I read one of these feel-good stories someone has to be critical of something. We all need to be more positive, and Kudos to the community and the father for doing what is best for the little one :-)
Reply
9-20-2009 @ 8:45PM
N said...There is no way he can ensure that the breast milk is safe. He didn't know these women...the family friend organized this...did she really know them, or did she simply ask who wanted to participate? My guess is the latter.
9-20-2009 @ 9:04PM
Bruc said...Just another day of collectivism in a land of private property rights.
9-20-2009 @ 9:13PM
kolpcon said...this is about the sickest thing I have ever read
Reply
9-20-2009 @ 8:42PM
Tigs said...what do you mean, "poor kid?" He is surrounded by many people who love and adore him. Also, who are you to judge that the father doesn't look sad enough? The spirituality involved in this situation is of the best kind....positive and nurturing. The father is doing what his wife would have wanted, and just because it doesn't fit your line of thinking does not mean it is wrong either morally or spiritually.
Reply
9-20-2009 @ 8:44PM
Elizabeth said...Let common sense prevail. The article said it was a small community where most everybody knew everyone, not like a city. These people care about each other. Do you honestly think one of those wonderful milk donators would knowingly put that baby at risk? I think it's a wonderful thing they are doing. God bless them and keep them all.
Reply
9-20-2009 @ 8:47PM
Ann said...This is why I am proud of living in a small Michigan community.You always here about the bad stuff when it comes to us in Mich never the good. This is why they say it takes a village perfect proof. Good Luck to the family of Little Moses he will be forever blessed. Not only by angels in Heaven but the one he has here on earth.
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