Parents Use Deception to Influence Kids
Categories: Preschoolers, Kids 5-7, Kids 8-11, Teens & tweens, In The News, Weird But True

A new study shows that parents lie to their kids often. Credit: m-a-p, Flickr
Researchers Gail Heyman, Diem Luu and Kang Lee set out to examine the subject of parental lying, and according to Science Daily, the team discovered that many parents tell their kids that bad things will happen if they don't behave. In one of two studies the the team conducted, moms and dads told lies that included telling a child that if he didn't eat all his food, he would get pimples.
Other parents reported that they concocted magical creatures to influence their kids' behavior. One mother told researchers: "We told our daughter that if she wrapped up all her pacifiers like gifts, the 'paci-fairy' would come and give them to children who needed them ... I thought it was healthier to get rid of the pacifiers, and it was a way for her to feel proud and special."
A second study examined college students' recollections about their parents' lying practices and got similar results, according to Science Daily.
The bottom line? Parents frequently lie to their kids, while telling them that lying is unacceptable.
"Children sometimes behave in ways that are disruptive or are likely to harm their long-term interests," Heyman told Science Daily. "It is common for parents to try out a range of strategies, including lying, to gain compliance. When parents are juggling the demands of getting through the day, concerns about possible long-term, negative consequences to children's beliefs about honesty are not necessarily at the forefront."
Is lying always wrong, or is it OK to tell our kids lies to get them to behave?
Recent Posts
- Reviews: What's New This Week (11/20/2009)
- Twitter Follow Friday on ParentDish! (11/20/2009)
- Diabetic Student Wins Fight For Extra Gym Classes (11/20/2009)
- Suri Cruise Stumbles in Her High Heels (11/20/2009)
- Sports Traditions as Important During Holidays as Turkey, Gifts Under the Tree (11/20/2009)

.jpg)
















Reader Comments (Page 1 of 1)
Red73 9-29-2009 @ 12:13PM
Sometimes you just have to do, what you have to do to make it through the day. If it's telling your kids a little white lie I don't see what the big deal is. I read truuconfessions.com so I know I am not the only one who does this. Out parents did it and we turned out ok.
Reply
kristin 9-29-2009 @ 4:23PM
I am not sure so much about the white lie as now is not the time to talk about it or MAYBE later, my favoriste is we shall see depending on the age. For the most part start lying young no matter if is is a white lie will lead to bigger ones. I am mother of 6 and raising my 2 great grandson that are age 2 and 3. No is no and yes is yes. If you make a promise, try to keep it. If they are not old enough to understand, just say we will talk about it when the time comes and change the subject to something they know more about. My parents did it too and I grew up knowing just how to avoid the truth with that white lie and I found a better way to parent. Not sure if I am right or wrong on this, but, my kids are grown and they don't do the white lie either. It may take a bit to get use to it, but it works. Even something like I am not home to someone on the phone instead of saying Sorry they are tied up and will return the call later. Just another approach.
smith 9-30-2009 @ 2:50AM
Nice one for kids.
Reply
smith 9-30-2009 @ 2:53AM
good things from parents about their kids.
http://www.sciencescore.com
Reply
lilahhillman 9-30-2009 @ 11:38AM
Some times I have to tell the kids were going to Chuck e Cheese just to get them out of McDonalds play room now their old enough to say your tricking me mommy
Reply
t.k. bollinger 10-15-2009 @ 10:50PM
This sounds to me like one of those No-shit-Sherlock kind of scientific findings. Parents have been telling their children monster stories since time immemorial. Further lying seems to be a necessary part of our mental development – any 5 year old will tell you a fib to get something they want – no amount of nannying about always telling the truth will change that.
Reply
Diania 10-20-2009 @ 6:48PM
If it is ok for parents to lie to us. Then tennagers should be allowed to lie also
Reply