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Worst Baby Name Trends of the Decade
Filed under: Baby Names, Opinions
Here at Name Lady Central we see names of all stripes, from the common and conservative to the wild and woolly.
Most of them, even the woolliest, are chosen with love by well-meaning moms and dads. But a few name trends from the past decade have crossed the line. Here are the Name Lady's picks for the worst name trends of the decade:
Selling Your Baby's Name To The Highest Bidder
Did you hear about the expectant parents who put naming rights to their new baby up for auction on eBay? In fact, you've had plenty of chances to hear that since the year 2000. In the sell-from-home decade, several families have seen baby naming as an opportunity to pick up some quick cash. This year, one determined Arkansas mom re-listed her unborn son's name auction five times. Her goal (unmet) was $20,000 to help pay the household bills.
Some of the eBay parents have seemed genuinely desperate, while others may have just been out for attention. Before you write them all off, consider one thing they had in common: They were trying to sell a name that belonged to somebody else, not their own. That makes them fitting emblems for a decade when more and more parents started treating baby names as creative fashion accessories.
Giving Your Baby A Corporate Trademark Name
There's a natural overlap between product names and baby names. Parents may be attracted to a name like Sienna for a girl for the same reasons that Toyota was attracted to it for a minivan. But since the '90s, the brand naming of babies has reached new heights. Labels like Nautica, Lexus and Armani have joined the ranks of America's top 1,000 names, and almost no popular brand seems off limits. At last count, four American boys sported the name ESPN.
The U.S. doesn't regulate baby names, but the more we bestow corporate trademarks on children, the closer we come to a brave new world of naming law. What does it mean when a corporation owns the rights to your name? What will happen to little ESPN if he wants to be a sportswriter, or to Nautica if she tries to design clothes?
Using Names As An Excuse To Make Fun Of People
Name insults are as old as schoolyard taunts. In this decade, though, adults have elevated baby name bashing to the level of blood sport. Whenever a new celebrity baby is born, the world waits with bated breath to tear the name to shreds. (In reality, most celebrity babies have perfectly normal names -- Henry and Ava are favorites -- but what fun is that?)
The most toxic name bashing uses names, real or invented, as a sly way to make fun of whole segments of our society. For example, one of the hottest Internet stories of recent years is the dubious tale of the girl named Le-a, pronounced Ledasha because "the dash don't be silent." The most common version of that story concludes with the commentary, "And we let these people vote."
Making Your Baby's Name A Tool To Advance Your Agenda
In December 2008, the Campbell family of New Jersey made international headlines when a supermarket bakery refused to write their young son's name in icing on a birthday cake. The rejected name: Adolf Hitler.
The parents expressed shock and dismay at the store's decision, but it soon became clear that they knew the score. The supermarket had rejected the Campbells' requests before, and they had pointedly insisted on both first and middle names on the cake, not just Adolf. In short, the parents had set up a media event, using their child's name as bait. Their whole Nazi-named brood and swastika-filled living room were soon being beamed to news outlets across the globe. How long before more zealots of every stripe follow suit, naming their children as living billboards?
Here's wishing us all a new decade of loving, well-chosen names.
What are the worst naming trends you've seen? Share your experiences! And if you have your own question to Ask the Name Lady, drop her a line!
Related: Most Stylish Baby Bumps, More From The Name Lady
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ReaderComments (Page 5 of 15)
12-28-2009 @ 6:35PM
Tarhole said...I live in NC, and come across many names that I can't even pronounce. I think the parents opened a can of alphabet soup, took a bite and spit it out, and created a name.
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12-28-2009 @ 6:37PM
Tarhole said...I know a gal whose first name is Krystal....she got married to a guy with a last name of Peters, many a good laugh out of that one.
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12-28-2009 @ 6:57PM
Cindy S said...I can go one better...I know a woman named Crystal Crapsi....honest to goodness!
12-28-2009 @ 6:47PM
Sara said...I worked with a girl who wanted to call her son Q, but her mother wanted her to name him Jeremy. Both normal, her sister solved the problem by creating the name QuJeremy. Brillant right?
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12-28-2009 @ 6:54PM
Sarah said...I have also seen an Abcde this year. Also, Usnavy as in the (U.S. Navy) it is pronounced oohs-na-vee...
I agree that a child's name should not be too over the top or outrageous but, a little uniqueness is fun.
And, I think that old-fashioned names are very pretty. Particularly because the names give an air on importance, especially for boys.
What do you think of Nicholas Alexander? Bartholomew? Charles?
My great aunt's name is Marie Antoinette and I think it's lovely.
I think all the names of any royal family are beautiful.
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12-28-2009 @ 7:12PM
layla said...my name is Layla...after the derek and the dominos song and I love it...
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12-28-2009 @ 7:21PM
Lassie said...Cornelius and Candida are two splendid old names that are, unfortunately, laughed at in modern times....I love the name Candy, even though it's stripper-ish, though poor Candy Kane must have grown tired of life by third grade. However, Tiffany and Krystal, sadly, are directly from the 80's and low-class. Sorry. Tiffany and Krystal are the equivalent of Bubba and Billy Ray. And for heavens sakes, parents - DO NO give your boy the middle name of "Wayne". Every mass murderer has "Wayne" for a middle name.
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12-28-2009 @ 7:34PM
Fortune said...My name is Fortune. Seriously. And yes, you can imagine all the jokes...which I've heard constantly. The worst thing is when people say the same tired stuff like "Oh, like 500?" I just glare at them and say, "That was funny 499 times ago." Or, "Like 'cookie'?' " One problem with a unique name is that people all think they're the first with the jokes. And I've had to make up a standard line, "No, I don't HAVE one...yet." I'm SO tired of that line. The thing is, I was born in the early 1960s, so this was long before this stupid-name trend. And actually, it's my middle name. I could use my first name, but I hate it. And believe it or not, people misspell it and mispronounce Fortune. People also ask, "What's your REAL name"?, like I would make this up. Or, "Were your parents hippies?" I wish my mother had named me Debbie, or something like that. I like having an unusual name, but you get so defined by it. And people are always calling me something ELSE. I've been called Harmony, Treasure, Faith, Hope, Blossom, Star, Future...I'm so over it. Folks, do your kid a favor: give them a "normal" name.
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12-28-2009 @ 11:08PM
Sierra said...Hey Fortune,
I know how you feel when people add on to your name. I can't tell you how many times I've told someone my name and they've responded with "Is your middle name Nevada?" My friend's dad said it the first 5 times I saw him and now insists on calling me Sierra Nevada. My parents did name me after the mountain range so I can't get too upset. Oh and when Ciara (the singer) first came out with her song "1,2 step", every time one of my friends saw me I'd hear "SIERRA! This beat is....." The first hundred times it was kind of fun because we would all start singing the song and end in laughter. I love making people smile so I didn't mind much but now it's just old. And of course having to spell my name so they don't spell it the way the singer does has gotten very tiring. Sadly, I've taken to saying "You know, like the mountain range?" and even more depressing, they give me a blank stare and ask "With a 'C' ?"
12-29-2009 @ 7:33AM
kiki said...I used to work with a girl named Fortune. Everyone called her Tuney.
12-28-2009 @ 9:15PM
Denise said...I attended elementary school with a girl named Adele Doe. I wonder if she even made it through Junior High...
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12-28-2009 @ 7:48PM
Dina said...When I was in Middle School I had a friend named Mary Juana (first and middle names) and when I worked for an insurance agent I had a client with two children......Pajama (accent on the Pa) and Exit (acccent on the I....like excite with out the c) She was illiterate and named her children the first word she read after delivery because it was a "sign". The Charity hospital (Big C in New Orleans) had a lot of Shinola's born there too (after the floor cleaner)
I remember hearing that you should try out your child's name to see if it fits in the following three sentences:
Can "______" come out and play.
May I introduce our President "__________"
"________" you are the love of my life.
If the name sounds good in all three sentences it is a winner, if not, pick something else. I think that is good advice!
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12-29-2009 @ 2:47AM
Lobster Loverf said...Louisiana is full of 'interesting' names. My mother's mother was walking in the woods in the early part of the last century along with her cousin. They found a knife with the name Duthel carved in the handle, along with the face of a woman. Both women later had daughters that they named that. My mother was given the middle name Huey, for Huey P.Long who was giving silver cups to any babies named for him. Mother got the name but not the cup.
Rather than use the 3 sentences, I suggest the same criteria as I told my daughters about dating. Never date a man whose name you can't whisper in the dark with out laughing. Of course I then went with a man called Bubba. ha!! My Daddy was a junior and his name was Beverly.
12-28-2009 @ 7:53PM
Mom of 7 said...I'm not so into the new trend of using "Old Lady Names", ie. Emma, Sarah, Gladys, Helen, Ethel, Clara, etc. I had 80 yr. old Aunts with everyone of those names when I was growing up. They are all deceased now. I just have a real hard time looking at a newborn with those names and not seeing my old housecoat-girdle-wearing elderly aunts. I know someone on here will say everything old will be new again someday, even from my era. Someday when everyone born in the late 50's and into the 60's with the names Linda, Brenda, Nancy, Cathy, Tina, Lisa, Lori, Susan, and Sheri will be in their 80's and 90's or deceased, and people will start naming their newborn baby girl's by those names. My kids shudder to think that anyone could every name their baby girl Brenda. But it was quite popular in the late 50's and early to mid 60's for baby girls.
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12-29-2009 @ 6:03PM
eightasterisks said...I, too, think of older women when I hear those names...grandmothers and great aunts who were wonderful, loving, tremendous, incredibly strong women who survived the Great Depression and were WACS and WAVS during World War II, helping to defend the Allies, that raised my parents to be loving and kind, who in turn raised me. I would have no problem naming a child of mine after my grandmother or great-grandmother, great-aunt, grandfather, or great-grandfather.
12-28-2009 @ 8:06PM
Emily Lee said...I'm serious about this now: My cousin's name was spelled wrong on his birth certificate because his parents were trying to be "creative". They found out his name was missing a comma when he went to school and his teacher commented on his miss-spelled name. At first the teacher thought that my cousin spelled his name wrong. Well he repeated again and again that it was correct.She had had enough of his "silly-ness" and she ordered a conference with my aunt and uncle to talk about how their son had talked back to her andhe needs to learn how to spell his name correctly. My aunt and uncle had a fit! Later that year they finally realized that it was spelled wrong and it took then 2 years to get his name d legally changed so he could have the right spelling.
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12-28-2009 @ 8:16PM
BETH said...When I worked at a hospital in the early 90's, a woman actually had never heard the word Placenta...
YUCK !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! lol
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12-28-2009 @ 8:12PM
Dianne said...My sister once worked with a lady who named her son "Debris." When my sister asked her how she decided on that name, the lady replied, "Well, I was young and I thought it sounded good."
I've often thought of that kid over the years. Wonder how long it took him to change his name? :)
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12-29-2009 @ 6:58AM
sjoyce said...THE TRUTH!!! I went to school w/ afriend whose last name was sane.He named his son IAN SANE!!
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12-28-2009 @ 8:16PM
BETH said...Opps, I forgot to report she of course, named the little girl, PLACENTA........
the nurses tried in vain to change Momma's mind, showing her, her own placenta and medical photos, but that Momma just LOVED the sound of it and thus the baby was named.....PLACENTA
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