Sing in the New Year, ParentDish Style

Filed under: Opinions

An Auld Dilemma (To Auld Lang Syne)
Should park acquaintance be forgot
Because I hate her guts?
Or do I go back to the park
And act like she's not nuts?

I met here there beneath a tree
As she fed her son, Nobel,
A Whole Foods grape cut in sixteenths
And slathered in Purell.

He wriggled off and ran to slide
While she cried out, "Wait! Don't climb!"
You're only 2.3 years old,
2.4 is sliding time."

She scooped him up and placed some pads
On his elbows, wrists and knees
Then said that he could walk, not run,
Between two nearby trees.

Should this acquaintance be dumped fast
'Cause she's crazy as King Lear?
Or do I smile and be her friend
'Cause hey -- at least she's here?

She's here, at least she's here, though she
Told my son, "Don't touch the grass!"
So do I stay acquaintances
With that auld pain in the ... uh, park?


Related: Check out more of Lenore's original holiday songs, Part 1 and Part 2.

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AdviceMama Says:
Start by teaching him that it is safe to do so.