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A Parent's Dilemma: How to Handle a College Football Scholarship for a Seventh-Grader
Filed under: Sports
Put yourself in the shoes of David and Denise Sills. Fair warning, this will take some doing.
For the most part, the Sillses are a typical family. They live in Wilmington, Delaware. They have three children, all teenagers.
The two oldest are girls. The youngest is 13-year-old David. He's in the seventh grade and plays quarterback on the middle school football team at the Red Lion Christian Academy.
Apparently, David is pretty good at football because something unheard of happened last week. The University of Southern California, a college football power, offered him a sports scholarship. Trojan coach Lane Kiffin made the proposal and, with his parents' blessing, David accepted.
There are a few strings, of course. First, David has to graduate from high school. Before that, he has to graduate from the seventh grade. If all goes as planned, David's first game in a USC uniform will be in 2015.
Granted, it's hard to imagine your 13-year-old getting home from school, slamming down his backpack and asking permission to accept a USC football scholarship. (When my sons were that age, the big sports questions at our kitchen table were: "Where's my uniform?" Followed by, "Is it washed?" )
But if it happened in your family, what would you do?
David and Denise Sills have taken some heat over their decision to let David become the Trojans quarterback of the (somewhat distant) future. As the story has been picked up by national media, they've been skewered for being pushy sports parents. One writer, Mark Saxon of ESPN Los Angeles quipped: "I was feeling as though I needed to take a shower after mulling Sills' verbal commitment."
David Sills III, the quarterback's dad, hasn't seemed bothered by the criticism. Recently he told ESPN.com: "For the people that don't like kids getting recruited early, if it was their kid what would they do?...The way I look at it if David was a phenomenal mathemetician and I held him back, wouldn't that be wrong?"
Maybe. But what if David were doing math problems at the Rose Bowl in front of 100,000 screaming fans? And Brent Musburger was barking out play-by-play? Isn't that a fairer comparison?
Experts in child development and youth sports say they worry how Sills will handle the spotlight. Even more troubling to some is what the story of a 13-year-old playing footsie with a college football coach says about the state of youth sports in general.
"We're robbing children of their childhood," warns Richard Ginsburg, a sport psychologist who treats youth athletes and their families at Boston's Massachusetts General Hospital, in an interview with ParentDish.
"The sports industry has become tailored to giving children the hope that they have a chance to be scouted and picked. There are so many things that can go wrong: Overuse injuries, burnout, stress. Putting young bodies and minds into that kind of situation, they're just not ready for it.," says Ginsburg, co-author of Whose Game is It, Anyway? a book that helps parents navigate youth sports.
Much of the medical establishment agrees about those risks. This month, the American Academy of Pediatrics sent out its latest warning. AAP's Committee on Sports Medicine and Fitness reissued a caution first published in 2000: It reads: "Children involved in sports should be encouraged to participate in a variety of different activities and develop a wide range of skills. Young athletes who specialize in just one sport may be denied the benefits of varied activity while facing additional demands from intense training and competition."
Time will tell how David Sills deals with the challenges ahead of him. Not everyone in youth sports sees what's he's doing as a disaster. Some think it actually might work out.
Linda Petlichkoff, a sport psychology consultant and professor of Kinesiology at Boise State University, says her only reservation is whether David's dream truly belongs to him.
"Are these goals actually his goals or his dad's goals?" she says in an interview with ParentDish. "If they're his, I don't think anybody should say yay, nay or put up roadblocks. That's what life's about. Set your goals ands strive for them."
Ginsburg is more skeptical. "Five years from now, maybe it's a success story. Maybe all the stars align. But he's a superstar at 13. I'm afraid the only way to go is down."
ParentDish sports reporter Mark Hyman is the author of Until It Hurts: America's Obsession With Youth Sports and How It Harms our Kids (Beacon Press). Have a suggestion for an article on youth sports? Contact Mark at pdyouthsports@aol.com.
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ReaderComments (Page 5 of 10)
2-16-2010 @ 10:42PM
robert james said...Will Shakespeare had it right; Much Ado About Nothing. Leave the kid and his family alone. We may not even have a world by 2015.
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2-16-2010 @ 10:45PM
Mike said...I don't believe how many people are dumb enough to even think this is legitimate.
To start, no scholarship has been offered! For that matter, the coach doesn't even have the authority to promise a National Letter of Intent will be offered since a NLI is between the school and student-athlete, not the coach.
This was nothing, but a cheap grab for some ink and that is exactly what this short-term USC coach got. Of course, every putz from sports hacks to psychologists get their shot at public stupidy and are successfully taking every advantage of the situation.
BTW, I, too, am from Delaware and this "christian" academy is trying to become a football combine. Football first, academics......well, there must at least be some evidence of schoolwork, I guess.
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2-16-2010 @ 10:45PM
Mike said...I think what your seeing now is that this kid is head and shoulders above his peers now, much like a 6', 180 lb. 12 year old pitching against 5'4", 130 lb 12 year olds in little league. What could happen is that this kid finally gets in with maturing kids who are catching up to his speed, height and talent, and he gets lost in the crowd, particularly after he gets "whacked" a few times and it takes him down a few pegs--and opens his eyes. I saw it in my sport(hockey) a few times. Kids in the early leagues that we thought were ticketed to stardom, me being one of them, turn out to be just an above average player when they get in with later maturing kids and find that the golden days are gone. Been there, done that. There was a big difference between the guys we beat as kids and those same kids when we got into high school. It shocked me. I'm just surprised that USC would do this or be allowed to do like this. What's next, right out of the crib? What room was the NCAA napping in when this happened?
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2-16-2010 @ 11:21PM
TB said...Regardless if this is just an oral committment, what are Kiffin's coaches doing hanging out at middle schools when there is a ton of talent out there every year for more mature / developed athletes? Why give a young child with some talent this kind of pressure to succeed in football at such a young age? The rest of his middle school and high school career will be under such huge pressure and scrutiny to do well and if he doesn't live up to USC's standards in the long run, he's out!
Remember Todd Marinovich? This smells the same coming from USC. Marinovich's dad pushed his "Robo QB" son to the max. Let's put this kid on an Eastern Bloc training program and cut out the snickers, twinkies and everything else that is not healthy. Let's get real.
I believe I am pretty intelligent and I love to fly. I wanted to be an astronaut when I was 13. I am now 40 in a good career, but if any NASA folks read this please look me up as I think I can be a great shuttle pilot for you as I am much more smarter, wiser... and more mature than when I was 13.
NCAA....what are your thoughts on this?
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2-16-2010 @ 10:50PM
mark said...at least they didn't pretend he floated away in a balloon.
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2-16-2010 @ 10:49PM
havaianu said...Excuse my lingo.....but what in the heck is wrong with those so called "experts"?????? Let's see the possible kids side?
It probably went somethink like this... "Damn, unfreaking believable!!
USC wants me?????????? I can get a great degree on anything, on one of the best schools in the country, play football and the babes....DAMNNNNNN, DAMNNNNNNNN....I'M GOING TO BE THE QBBBBBBBBB OF USCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCC.... MOMMMMM....OOOOPS shutp up....can't tell her that...HAHAHAHA....DAMNNNNNNNNNN"
With those goals in mind he may just stay out of booze and drugs, be a lot more careful with his life, not taking stupid childish risks, hone his craft and just maybe become the very best QB USC has ever had.
I can just see these some peeps advising the parents of someone of the hilks of Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart who was already competent on keyboard and violin, he composed from the age of five and performed before European royalty (wikipedia quote).....
"Experts" get a life or at least go mess someone's life that is already messed up....
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2-16-2010 @ 10:58PM
TruckTurner said...This story brings to mind the cationary tale of Todd Marinovich. For those of you who don't follow USC football or are too young, Todd was a football phenom who was reared to be an elite quarterback from the cradle. Todd had early success at USC, but began to experience off the field challenges.
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2-16-2010 @ 11:49PM
rnsaudio said...bottom line he is going to get a free ride for school and maybe make millions in the nfl. every parents dreams for there kid and every kids dream.
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2-16-2010 @ 11:07PM
JoserJimenez said...Too bad colleges don't give out scholarships to 7th grade kids who are brilliant and may actually make positive contributions to humanity. But we need more people out playing with balls in tight pants....that is MUCH more important.....More evidence of the dumbing down of America...NICE
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2-16-2010 @ 11:14PM
Fishnlwayr said...Two headlines of the day: #1 Social SEcurity is going to run out of money in 2015 #2-- A 7th grader commits to playing football for USC in 2015.
What in hell is wrong with this picture/??
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2-16-2010 @ 11:13PM
Paul S said...This kids parents and Lane Kiffin are a match made in heaven:
Self absorbed,not very bright cluless morons. Can you say:
Todd Maronavich?? Same outcome sure to happen.
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2-16-2010 @ 11:15PM
Fishnlwayr said...Look who the coach is and you will see how far an idiot will go to further his own interests. BTW, I'm from the state of Tennessee and I hate the University of Tennessee....but Kiffin is an idiot who would sell out his own mama if it would generate a headline that will push his name out into the public.
Last year he got in trouble for saying that other coaches are "cheaters" and he bailed out at Tennessee just prior to having his feathers singed by the NCAA.... Now this garbage about a 13 y/o kid. The man has no shame.
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2-16-2010 @ 11:14PM
Marcie said...Who cares? All the things going on in the world....who cares about stupid sports? If it gives the kid free tuition....I'm all for that.
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2-22-2010 @ 11:53PM
Diamonte said...man i wish i kan get that get that his very lucky to get this scholarship im 10th grader 6 foot 3 an go to lynwoodhigh school an still no getting looked at so hope he keep up his good work ..
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2-16-2010 @ 11:18PM
Paul S said...The NCAA has all these stupid rules about you cant buy a recruit a meal off campus and you can't call them after 10pm, blah blah blah blah but they DONT have a rule about recruiting a kid in Jr high????
This would be a great situation for the NCAA to actually do something contructive and stop this abusive of children.
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2-16-2010 @ 11:22PM
bigjoke said...All you have to do is look up David Sills , of the Daystar Sills Const. Co. people , you cant see he is liveing his dream thru his son....only problem is i guarantee he bought that ticket
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2-17-2010 @ 10:35AM
Auguste said...I belive that somthing of this nature is ok. I(being a 15 year old) have set my sights on becoming an Army Ranger and going through West Point being it before or after i become a Ranger. I recently dropped football to do this. I think that the thing that the kid and the family have to know is that an injury will destroy this. An injured shoulder, leg, or rib within the next 5 years and USC will back out. Thereare just too many other players. I should know a busted sholder made me chose between the army or football. Have i've been called names and made fun of (even by coaches) yes. But i know what i want to do. If David know that this is his dream, he MUST fallow it.
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2-16-2010 @ 11:28PM
bk said...Well hopefully his parents are behaving like it's a great option for him to have and not an obligation that he must fulfill. What if he doesn't want to play football after High School?
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2-17-2010 @ 12:00AM
just sayin said...ok yes at 13 the kid is much taller than the average 13 yr old however he plays for a christian school, nothing bad about that however when you play for private schools lets just say the competetion well not so great! I think 13 is way too young to be filling this boys head up with this anything is possible to happen and i would hate to see how he reacts to life when that something does. I do wish him and his family the best but this is wayyyyyyyyyy to fast toooooooooo soon!
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2-17-2010 @ 12:17AM
Jon said...To me, this kid at 13 should be thinking about his first year in High school being around the corner,and hes probably at that age where he dosent think girls are so gross anymore so he should probably be thinking more about his first date,and then driving then commiting to a college to play footbal already.One could argue that his parents are nurturing his gift and potential but that could also be the other way around in the sense that what if he became really good at history and decided to do something with that or what if he just hated football one day but felt all the pressure because of this agreement to follow through on it while being unhappy. I would have said thanks but no thanks if I were his parent and simply said if you think my child is that good we will see in five years what he wants to do,and if its this come talk to us and him then.
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