Schools: Would You Grind On The Dance If Grandma Were Watching?

by Amy Hatch (Subscribe to Amy Hatch's posts)
Feb 17th 2010 2:30PM

Filed under: In The News

It's difficult to grind to Burt Bacharach -- or at least one West Hollywood high school hopes so.

A recent threat by Pacific Hills School to turn up the lights and play Bacharach's music is just one indication that adults are fed up with suggestive dancing -- otherwise known as "grinding" or "freaking" -- at school dances, MSNBC reports.

Schools across the nation are canceling dances, requiring students to sign agreements that spell out acceptable dancing techniques and behavior and asking students to get their groove on as if "Grandma is watching" -- all thanks to a pervasive dancing style in which partners simulate sexual acts to the beat.

The dancing isn't the only issue, school administrators say. Short skirts, lingerie-style outfits and "inappropriate touching" are also on the radar. Seattle's Nathan Hale High School postponed its winter semi-formal after an incident at the school's homecoming celebration.Before students were allowed to have another dance, principal Jill Hudson asked students to propose a plan for appropriate dance conduct. Now, students who attend the school's semi-formal (scheduled for March) will have to sign a contract stating that they won't engage in "lewd contact." Those who do will get a warning after one offense and will be kicked out of the dance after the second.

Students at Aliso Niguel High School in Aliso Viejo, Calif., also need to sign a contract forbidding them to grind, wear garters, excessively short skirts or other visible lingerie. Also forbidden? Removing your shirt. Go figure.

"The sexual nature of the dancing just seemed to be increasing," principal Charles Salter tells MSNBC, adding that this kind of behavior isn't limited to his school. "One school found condoms on the floor."

Minnetonka High School in Minnesota ditched the contracts and instead engaged in tongue-in-cheek campaign it calls "Dance Like Grandma's Watchin'."

Principal David Adney tells MSNBC that invoking Grandma gets teens in their gut: Kids may not care about annoying their parents, but still want their grandmothers' respect. The school crafted a series of videos for the campaign, including one where a student is rejected from Harvard College because of a grinding incident.

Adney says the campaign works.

"It's about creating a culture of respect and inclusion," he tells the news station. Here's one video from the campaign:

Is grinding just good, clean fun or are schools doing the right thing by cracking down on suggestive dancing?

Related: Prom Dresses Not Fair: Lesbian Fights to Wear Pants

ReaderComments (Page 1 of 3)

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2-18-2010 @ 1:22AM

nadia said...

I hate to say it, but as a recent high school graduate, seeing the skits shown in the video wouldn't have convinced me at all. They're the kind of thing that would be laughed at by students, not with. Grinding is simply the newest trend that these teens are being targeted for, and like all the others, it will pass.Obviously I'm speaking from a bit of a subjective view, but this brings to mind the days of my grandparents when any kind of dancing that wasn't ballroom was viewed as sinful by many people. It's a trend; it will have its time and be replaced by something else. In the meantime, prohibiting it in such a way will only make it more appealing to the students.

2-19-2010 @ 2:25PM

Alex said...

im in grad school, definitely not in the high school dance scene anymore, but i dont think i would call this just a phase-freaking started when i was in middle school in the late 90s and it was even an issue then. i think its appropriate for schools to crack down on this, and im wondering why it has taken them so long to do so...i mean, 10 years ago kids were having sex on the dance floor disguised as freaking. this isnt just "oh i dont like how you are dancing cuz im a prude" its that kids are having sex at a school function and are often way too young to be engaged in that kind of behavior anyways.

2-19-2010 @ 2:35PM

Cin said...

The only problem is (if we don't stop this) that the behavior just keeps getting worse and worse. Schools cannot let it continue. What would be next???

2-19-2010 @ 3:56PM

Simzee said...

This is a classic case of Americans being a PRUDE. Americans eat that sex up until.........Not many people in America will EVER admit to liking sex. People do show those true colors when it comes to sex. Get with it people.

2-19-2010 @ 4:21PM

Brendalee said...

"freaking" started at about the sametime as "break dancing" which for the Los Angeles area was the early 80's at least that is when I noticed it. That is an awefully long time to just be a passing trend. I do have to agree that it was much more innocent back then then it is today. That still doesn't make it "new".

2-19-2010 @ 3:01PM

bigdkay said...

I taught high school for over 30 years and I am sad to say that I met grandmothers who would LEAD the grinding rather than condemn. It's a cute idea, but another slogan would be more realistic.

2-19-2010 @ 3:17PM

David S. said...

In West Hollywood, no less? You must be kidding. As to the "sexual dancing" get a life. It is 2010, not 1910. Most kids are not having sex on the dance floor; it isn't Studio 54 in the 1970's. If your teens are going to have sex, 99% of the time it won't be on the dance floor, folks. Just the usual prudes and alarmists blathering on about nothing....yawn...and how insulting to insinuate all "Grandma's" think alike....

2-19-2010 @ 5:11PM

diane said...

It is pretty clear that there are an awful lot of young teens that are embarassed by the way some of the kids dance. If you can't or won't get on the floor to grind etc. you are teased about it. Of course the cool kids who do it will laugh at you. Teens follow others a lot and are always afraid to be different. The type of dancing we see at school functions is embarassing to some of us adults who must be present. We talk about it and know that for most of us this kind of behavior would never have been tolerated by the adults who attended our school dances, heck we could never have even thought about some of these moves. They are sexual and they are rude to people who don't abide by them, bu can' leave your duty of chaperone. Some are downright scary and you know with teens one thing often leads to another and dancing in that way just increases the odds of kids getting out of hand. The sad thing about this movement in some schools is that sure as the sun will rise, some parents will start screaming about the rights of kids to do whatever they want. The parents like this probably danced the same way in the 80's and 90's. They are not bad parents they are just unaware, busy parents. Have any ever gone to the school to watch the kids dance. It is an eyeopener.

2-19-2010 @ 7:22PM

Amy said...

As a 2004 graduate, I can tell you that yes, teenagers DO have sex on the dance floor of these events. I've witnessed it. On the dance floor, behind curtains, under cloth-covered tables. It DOES happen. Is it the only place it is going to happen? No. If they are doing it there, they are doing it elsewhere. But don't think children are innocent and America is just prude. It HAPPENS.

2-19-2010 @ 3:23PM

Meagan said...

This type of dancing started in the late 80's when I was in junior high! I wonder why no one tried to stop the "trend" as far back as then.
It really amazes me that the kids in school are doing things they think of as new,but the really started in the late 80's and early 90's. Like the huge,baggy pants,that got it's start,slightly,in 1988,but fully was embraced in 1991-92! Here we are,getting closer to 20 years later,and the kids are still wearing huge ugly clothes and acting like they're the ones who invented it! Also,the goth look,the only thing that's changed with that from when i was in school is that now you can go to Hot Topic and buy all of your Gothic needs. So,instead of looking "unique" you look like everyone else who shops at these stores. Kind of makes me sad to see that this new generation doesn't have anything unique about it. It all just regurgitated cheap pathetic crap that gets worse each year, and the kids just seem to have less and less respect for themselves,others and other things outside of themselves.
So,since this grinding-style dance has been around since the late 80's,I don't think it's going anywhere any time soon. Sadly.

Sarah said...

Actually..
The new style is the sagging SKINNY jean.
Hah. :)

But as a recent high school graduate,
I can tell you I avoided dances BECAUSE of this kind of dancing. That's all people did. Grind, grind, grind.
There weren't even the cute slow dances that used to exist!

If you don't grind, you stand there looking weird.
And it's not fun.
Grinding isn't fun either, actually.

So I agree with the guidelines.
They have behavior and dress codes during school hours,
Why not during SCHOOL dances as well?

2-19-2010 @ 5:57PM

Heather said...

I agree Megan. Hey I went to old navy the other day and realized flannel shirts are coming back in style, should I go out and buy shorts and combat boots to go with them? Here comes back the 90's grunge.

2-20-2010 @ 6:02PM

mallie0333 said...

I am so amazed and disgusted at the morals and values of teens these days. I have teen grandsons who tell me that most of the girls are just sluts these days. It's a sign of moral decay infamilies and our country. Soddam and Gommorah is alive and growing in America now. We need to put some definite rules in place before we all go down the drain. TEACH THESE YOUNG PEOPLE MORALS AND VALUES BEFORE IT"S TOO LATE!!

2-19-2010 @ 3:40PM

stix said...

Does anyone remember a little movie called Dirty Dancing?

2-19-2010 @ 3:44PM

mark mason said...

Teaching kids to be civilized in high school, good luck on that one. If they haven't learned it at home, a few hard looks and bad commercals aren't going to do it, but please try anyway.

2-19-2010 @ 3:59PM

dale said...

i dont care if it the " latest fad or what ever" proms should be 50,s 60,s 70, and 80,s music only . if they want to act like theyre f*** ing on the dance floor then toss them out and expel them if need be . why should we just go along with it because its the trend ??? i agree some rules are way out there but kids should be taught in whats approprate and whats not . they are minors and grown ups set the rules its plain and simple . school teaches you how to prepare for real life and in real life you arent going to tell your boss how " your gonna dress " but they tell you and you accept it or dont take the job . i can see momma now telling the milatary how her son or daughter is going to dress and not in that awful drab green shit . yeah , right ! kids and parents need to grow up and get a life and follow the rules like the rest of us did . hell we lived and survived and grew from it and so can they . all you little twirps out there we the grown ups tell you what to do and what to wear and you follow the rules or we,ll slap the crap outta ya get it ?? you are minors and dont have the rights as an adult yet ,

spike said...

Do your screwing in the bedroom or backseat ,not on the dance floor .I don't care if its 2050

2-19-2010 @ 3:57PM

mccannpig said...

I think is is high time the schools got involved in this type of thing. I am sick of hearing people whining about the fall of todays youth. Parents need to take an active roll in teaching their children respect for themselves and others. When I was in school it was far different than today. My parents never considered suing when I was spanked by the principle or teacher. I am almost positive there is a laywer and or parent thinking about how to make a few $$ for the infringement of the freedom of expression pushed on the kids for not allowing them to dance the way they want.

2-19-2010 @ 4:03PM

krista said...

I have to say I agree with the schools decision...I am 21 and I remember this going on from 6th grade up. The thing is, teenagers and young kids want to grow up too fast so they do the things that people 18+ or 21+ do because they deem it "cool". I like the idea of old dances like in the 50's where it was a real experience, your date had to be respectful and dancing was a beautiful thing and not purely just sexual. That is probably why there are so many pregnant kids.

2-19-2010 @ 4:24PM

be_my_conspiracy2006 said...

OH NOES!!!!!!!!! THE SKY IS FALLING! THE SKY IS FALLING! And we as Americans wonder why the world laughs at us...

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