A Son in Jail

I AM A MOTHER AND MY SON IS IN JAIL FOR THE 10TH
TIME IN THE LAST 13 YEARS. I AM SO TIRED OF HIS
LIFESTYLE I HAVE HAD HIM COMMITTED FOR DRUG ADDICTION, I HAVE TAKEN OUT WARRANTS FOR STEALING,
I HAVE HAD A NERVOUS BREAKDOWN AND HE ACTUALLY
STOLE $1600 FROM OUR BUSINESS WHILE I WAS BATTLING
CANCER, HIS WIFE AND KIDS HAVE DIVORCED HIM
THE KIDS ARE 11,8 AND 5 HE HAS NEVER BEEN THERE
AT ALL FOR ANY OF THEM. HE BEAT HIS WIFE IN FRONT
OF HIS KIDS. SO I HAVE CUT MY TIES FROM HIM. I
LOVE HIM AND AM PRAYING FOR HIM BUT I AM SICK OF
WATCHING HIM CONTINUE TO DESTROY HIMSELF AND
EVERYONE AROUND HIM. HIS FATHER DIED IN 2005 FROM
A METH OVERDOSE WHILE HE WAS IN JAIL. MY SON
IS NOW FACING LIFE IN PRISON AND ALL I CAN DO IS
PRAY. I HAVE ANOTHER CHILD SHE IS 17 AND DOING
VERY WELL. THANKS FOR LISTENING !!

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I had to let my son go. my only child. the tears aren't everyday now, i can't find a way to stop being a mother - even from a distance. i pray that if he lives, he might still have a chance at a decent life. i don't even know if i could ever look at him again...some days i'm not sure that i would want to. by far the biggest disappointment of my life. i don't ever think the pain will go away.

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Not anybody realizes how life is with a child in jail or prison I was a single parent,I worked 3 jobs to support my kids and now thanks to that they have ended up in jail and prison 2 of them going now I tried my best because I love them all.My husband now liked them as long as they were doing good.Now I am getting a divorce because I love my children.The only reason they got where they are now is because I was never home with them because I had to work so much.I went to social services when I had one job asked for help they said i owned to new of a vehichle to get foodstamps all the people there had better cars then me GO FIGURE

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In my opinion,your son isnt a habitual criminal.he's just protesting.to me,he's not what i consider a life long,hardened criminal so for you to want to bail him out of jail would be natural.I have an older child who kept running away from home,was doing drugs.I told her that i'm such an a-hole,etc.then she can live her own life.told her she can learn the hard way the things i was trying to teach her.I also said not to call me for money or help.I played what i call tough love.I refuse to be an enabler for her.I washed my hands of her.she made and continues to make bad decisionsbut its her life now,she can learn from her choices her deal with the aftermath the rest of her life.we talk,she knows that the door for free help closed long ago.shes my daughter and i love her but i will not allow the drama shes created for herself disrupt my life.some dont agree with me on this but i feel i'm doing the right thing.they have to hit rock bottom and have to pick themselves up in order to change,they cant always do that if mommy or daddy are always there to rescue them

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Hmmmm, Peggy, you seem to be one that fails to take responsibility for not only your actions, but the actions of your two drunk sons. Perhaps if you stopped enabling the little dears they might stay out of jail long enough to actually get a job. I'll bet that you had a "label" on them very early on so you could pump them up with pills and plunk them in front of TV to have VH1 raise them. You are really quite pathetic.

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I've been writing a lot about how messed up the jail system is. on how corrupt it is and how it really does nothing to help society...other than shift society into prisons..I think peaceful protests are more effective esp. in large numbers.

Protesting is a way for a citizen to change a law that is corrupt and obstructs justice. The more people stay active and protest, the less weak people as a whole we will be. America still has a voice--a collective one. as free individuals, we have The right to protest....governments should not have too much power over the citizens, lawmakers are there as citizens for the people--not to run us.and SILENCE is the stamp of political oppression.

people can collectively assemble to change laws and the decisions that are turning our world and nation to ruins. if anything, not protesting is part of the problem. if you thought the war was wrong, it'd be a sin not to speak out. If anything good came out of the war, it caused a lot of people to wake up....because the war is not over. will it ever be?

Throughout time, people have been finding issues in society and with what is deemed as conventional and what is free. Thinking back, we know that racism and segregation was once conventional in the United States. It has changed since then, but only through the willpower of people going against what was/is conventional. Conventional thinking and independent thinking have shaped the world at large, and the way we approach others in society today.

Conventional models of society represent an unchanging dynamic. For example: religion, especially Christianity, has become very conventional in modern times. Christianity is conventional in the United States, while Islam is not considered a conventional religion in the U.S. but is more-so in the Middle Eastern region.

Religion involves a lot of ritual and hierarchy. Do widely held beliefs and accepted notions add or detract from society as a whole? They seem to do a little of both. Sharing beliefs can, in some ways, solve problems and bring others together. It’s when these beliefs are inherently wrong and destructive that there is a real problem.

An independent system has all members actively engage and participate within it. It sees that no human is discarded or disregarded by the foundation it represents. All people are equal, life is independently shared, and not through an established set of laws.

Conventional society is powered through obligation, and by a sense of duty to the fellow individual. You know you’re being taken care of, as long as you cooperate within its structure and go with the flow. Going with the flow in society has drawbacks, such as the exclusion or repression of independent thinking. The more society crowds itself into a conventional product of human behavior, the less people there are willing to cross the line into the unconventional.

When the nation’s society becomes too conventional, then we’ll start blindly following the leader until no one knows where we are heading. If you were working at an assembly line, would you get the job done by being creative or by following the same repetitive habit? You’d get your work done following the ritual, but there would likely be more progress if more were urged to take part in the company’s growth.

Could we compare a factory to the way the government runs with its people? I would hope not. Yet, there are many examples where the people have gathered in protest of the government where numbers are all that matter, yet they aren’t counted. Thousands, hundreds of thousands even, have protested the wars that began after September 11th. They were acting of free will, independently, to change the direction that conventional society is heading.

The outcry against torture and human injustice seemed to wane after President Obama was elected. My hopes were that there would be change to these things people felt so passionate about, yet all the attention was diverted to healthcare. Once again, the media and corporations collectively acted to steer society from independence back to the conventional. And I don’t blame them, after all sheep are easier to take care of.

An independent society does not instigate punishment towards someone for acting independently against its societal structure, because it has none. An independent society is a collective unity of people who cooperate under free will, not by force or establishment. An independent society survives because of the people who keep it going. They are not the institution that convention breeds.

Can we have an independent society that works? Do conventional societies last? Ask the founding fathers of the constitution what their big plan was. They’d probably tell you it was for the human race itself to survive without becoming obliterated by violence, poverty, and greed. I wonder if they’d rather have a conventional society or an independent one. I also wonder if they think we are heading in the right direction.

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I have four children and the two youngest are always in trouble. They have stolen from me and others, delt and done drugs and are always being arrested and running from police. After trying several times to help them, I had to stop and let them make their own way in life whatever that may bring. To this day they still lie,steal,and cheat anyone they can. I myself will have them arrested if they do anything else to me. I won't help them get out of jail or help them run. You may think the worst of me but you have no idea what I have been through for the last 15 years.

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My son is in prison. No not because he protested. But 8 years of meth abuse. He has tried to kill me and my husband a couple of times. He has lied, stolen left us with a grandson to raise, I am having to seek a doctors help with my emotional and mental status. I find out that he could parole in June and I know that is not long enough. We have stood by him long enough. We love him but you have tough love to use. I know it is time. He has robbed me and my husband of so much. And his younger brother. Not to mention his 3 year old son. I do not know if i will ever trust him again. But I know he is a danger to society in general when he is on that crap. Can anyone relate to me? Well I pray for you all,

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Peggy,
We all have choices. Our choices are relative to our character. Bad choices come with a higher price than good ones. Life 101.

Jesus built a road to heaven with three nails and two cross ties.

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Our first born is now sitting in a jail cell for the 2nd time. He was an exceptional student in high school and got an academic scholarship to college. So what happened, how does a son with such potential find himself in jail. DRUGS, DRUGS AND MORE DRUGS. All kinds, mostly prescription drugs. Once when we took him home from college, because he almost died in his car, we found a shopping bag full of prescription drugs. My son was and is the consumate liar, he could sell ice to eskimos. He believes he is smarter than everybody else, always trying to talk has way around his trouble. We bailed him out the first time and told him it would never happen again, and so when he called us 2 months ago begging us to bail him out, Because, " the doctor messed up his prescription and now he was being charged with a felony-possession of narcotics and forgery". We told him never to call again, that we had done it once and would not do it again, Not after years and years of taking him to rehabs, inpatient facilities, you name it he did it, NOTHING WORKED. He would hold on for a few months and than back to his old ways. I once told him the only thing we haven't done was bury him and we fully expected to have to do just that... He destroyed our family, He broke our hearts and the hearts of his 3 younger brothers. Just this past Christmas, our youngest put his Christmas list together, he asked for his brother to be able to come home. No parent should have to tell there son why his brother can't come home. I hope and pray that my son will come back to me, that he will be the beautiful, smart, hard working son I knew for 19years, but I don't believe that will. I just hope that he will find peace so that our family will find peace. So NO I WILL NEVER BAIL OUT MY SON AGAIN... I AM HOPING THIS TIME WILL BE A REAL EYE OPENER AND HE WILL GET HIS LIFE BACK. WE, HIS FAMILY, HAS WORKED HARD TO GET OUR LIVES BACK AFTER 5 YEARS OF TORTURE. I WISH YOU ALL PEACE.

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So sad...you are enabling the destructive behaviour in your older son and ignoring your other son. Its readily apparant that you are simply too afraid to simply let him go. Its rather pathetic that with people wanting to work, somehow your son travels the world, getting into fights, damaging property and other people, getting arrested. Such a shame. A wasted life...if you are smart you'd concentrate on keeping his little brother from following him.

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I have been arrested 3 times in 47 years. My first 2 were dui's and I was let out after a nights sleep. Dad was there to pick me up and the first time I was greatful he was there. The 2nd time I was ashamed as I only had 2 beers and thought after an hour I was ok but I wasn't. My last time was something just plain stupid and for the life of me I do not know how my parents found out but I had never been so ashamed in my life I really wanted to crawl into a hole and die. It was not fair to put them through that type of situation and it was plain out wrong. But they are my parents and it was at that point it really sunk in that parenthood does not end at 18. Stupid childish thining is what should have changed. I may have made some mistales in my life but they were my mistakes .My mistakes caused heartache to my parents. I learned and i hope that your children learn before it becomes something serious.

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My only child, my son, is in prison for hte 2nd time. The first time was because of an accident and he admitted being in the wrong. He did his time, got out of prison and worked hard to be a decent human being, wonderful father and loving husband.

In July he was accused of something he did not do and ended up in prison again. I totally support my son no matter what he does. I raised him to be a kind, considerate and loving man, which he has turned out to be. It is not by his choices that he got into trouble this time, it was by someone elses.

I had always told my son that if he found himself in jail for a choice that he made, he can count me out of people to call for help. I kept that word. The first time he went to jail, I did not go to help him, I did not even go to see him. I did accept calls from him, because as his mother, I still love him and noone is ever hopeless. As long as the9ir is breath, there is hope.

This time however, I know without a doubt he would have never done what he was accused of. I paid for an expensive attorney to fight his case. Unfortunately he was in a corupt town with no chance at all. Even the person doing the accusing, changed their tune and said he would never do what they said he did. It changed nothing.

You can sit there an juge parents who help their children all you want. If you are so callous as to say you would give up on your child because of a little trouble, then do you truly think that anyone would believe you love your child? Family is ALWAYS there for family. We may not agree with thier choices, but we still love them.

BTW: the father? --- said his son was dead to him. Which is really ironic, because the thing my son is accused of.... he actually did and spent time in prison. Did his mother give up on him? NO

Thanks for listening. Before you judge someone for how they feel.... think about how YOU would feel if you were in the situation these people are in. Would you want your Parents, family and friends to give up on you?

Prayer is the only thing that will save us all!

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You love your kids no matter what. You may not love what they do, but you love them. Everyone needs to know there is always someone out there who cares. Sometimes that's the thing that's makes them make better decisions.

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