Can a Mom Leave Her Kid Alone at the Library for Three Minutes?

I totally agree. Last year there were two kidnapping attempts in my town with the parent not even 15 yards away (one was in the child's yard, the other in a Walmart), so I would never, never, NEVER leave my 5-year-old child in a public place for even 30 seconds. Taking your child with you is just plain common sense, and no, there is no community support anymore. You're lucky if you even have family support. If I was the librarian, I would have had no problem with watching the child, but I would have definitely thought the parent was taking a rather stupid risk for leaving them with me.

Can a parent ever let a five year old out of their sight for five minutes in public place, park, mall, library, Wal Mart etc etc? The answer to that is No, never, not once. In the situation described the librarian is working, like at a job, and if someone comes to the desk is the librarian going to say, Oh I am sorry I can not help you I am watching this stanger's child. A terrible idea. It would take less than 90 seconds for a child to be gone. And gone is gone. It is then to late for what if or if only or I should have. Don't do it. Is it a incredable responsibilty to take care of a child? A responsibility that is 24/7 that never goes away? And is the greast privillage and joy life can bring? You better believe it. Take the weight!

If something happened to the child, in spite of the librarian's best efforts, would the mother sue the librarian, the library and the city? In today;s world the answer is likely "yes". That by itself wshould have the librarian saying "no thanks".

I am the mother of two "children", 21 and 24. Even 20 years ago when my children were toddlers I would never have dreamed of leaving them supervised by a librarian or any other person who was not exclusively responsible for them. Yes, you can argue that we shouldn't keep our children so insulated that they don't experience the world, but we also have to consider the world in which we live. It crushes my heart when I hear about another child who has been abducted sometimes by someone that the child knows...the parents know. Why risk it? Why take a chance? I intend to be equally as diligent with my grandchildren and my great grands...it is just the reality of what our society has become.

I am a counselor and I can tell you very well how dangerous this world is, not made up or exagerated. I have worked with many people, your ordinary factory worker, neighbor, restaurant server, police officer, grocery store clerk, youth minister, etc. I have found dangers in all of these places. A 5 year old is still at the point of needing protection and to have her kidnapped, killed or raped is not the appropriate way to teach her how to take care of herself. There are so many more appropriate and safer ways to teach our children how to take care of themselves and frankly I would rather my child have some normal realistic fears than to be free range and possibly molested or dead. That danger is not worth the risk to me and I would hope other moms feel the same way. I don't think it is appropriate to teach a 5 year old as you would an older child that has more ability to reason and self protect or even aknowledge dangers. 5 year olds are not mentally capable of doing that yet. How do you know, that liberian may have very well been given a veiled warning about herself. I have had a client that had been a child predator asked to babysit. Thank God she was able to say no to that request, that time.
With my own children, I did live in a fear that helped me to be a cautious careful parent, not crazy or shaking in my shoes. I think that is the smart way to go. In my mind it was so much better to err on the side of safety.

Look what happen to Madlyn McCain when the parents decided to leave their children in a LOCKED hotel room. It is just plain ignorant to not safeguard your most prized possession. If you want to run off and not worry about them, bring a sitter with you. It is CERTAINLY not the librarian's job to watch your child and if she does it for one, how can she justify NOT doing it for others. She has obligations to the library with her job duties, not babysitting duty. How unfair for the Mother to assume this would be OK.

I am a mother of a 19 year old man....still to this day I do not like to even leave him sitting in the car while I run in to pay for gas. There are psychos on every corner. I am not going to be one of those moms who has no idea what happened to her child. Mind you my son is 6 foot and weighs 230 and plays football. I am sure he now can take care of himself but I refuse to happen on my shift. And to ask a complete stranger, doesnt matter where she worked, Im sure Jeffrey Dahmer, John Wayne Gacy and all the other serial killers had jobs. She did not know this woman from adam but yet trust her to keep an eye on her kid. Besides the fact if the girl did come up missing that would be exactly who she blamed...........Good for the Librarian.

It's not the librarian's job to babysit. It's unfair and irresponsible to ask the librarian to look after her child for any length of time. In this day and age we just don't leave our children in the care of strangers, ever.

It is so NOT the job of the adult at the library to babysit for any ammount of time. They may be called away or have other things to do. The mother has to be a mother, not asking the child what she wants to do but to do the right thing. The right thing was to either go earlier to the library to allow for time or to take the child with her. Period. I am sick to death of so called free range kids, as they have no bounderies, tend to be obnoxious, and have no"real" parents. If you don't want to be responsible for you offspring, don't have them!!

I hate to say it but the librarian was correct. Maybe blunt but right. Pedophiles know you are not going to be as on guard in a library and wait for an chance. They are called predators for a reason.

Do you realize there are dangers in the house that a child in a bedroom or any room by themselves for 3 min could do to themselves.

Why would you not want to help out your neighbor, I would have watched the little girl and if needed talked to her until her mom got back. What ever happened to it takes a village to raise a child.

The only thing the librarian did wrong was in the nature of her reply.
A librarian can not take responsibiliity for someone else's child. Period. End of sentence.
And that SHOULD be a policy of the library system. (irrelevant of how any individual library staff member might feel about the situtation, there are liability issues involved)
Suppose, shortly after Mommy leaves the room, another person comes in and asks for the librarian's help.
The librarian goes into the bookstacks to help that person find the information needed and, upon returning two minutes later, sees that the child is gone.
Snatched? Got up and walked out?
Guess who Mommy is going to scream at.
I understand Mommy's quandry but the child is Mommy's responsibility and Mommy was wrong to offer the child a choice before checking with the library staff as to the appropriateness of leaving the child there without a parent.

What are you stupid? It's people like you who spread fear, a busybody is what you are. It's people like you who think children should never fail at anything and that all people are equal. Why don't you lock your child in a plastic bubble with knee pads and a football helmet. Times have'nt changed, time never changes only the perception of people change. Fearmongering never leads to anything but more fear and stupid laws that punish parents for being human. Instead of "good" parents we now have parents,who spend their lives raising children under the ever watchful eyes of Big Brother and do goodie busybodies with a direct line to DHS. The only thing that we SHOULD fear is the way this country is going down, something worth being VERY afraid of.

I agree with EIleen totally. How can freerange mom even think of giving such advice. THIS IS NOT 1950! I was a state representative for 6 years and saw list after list of sex offenders just within 5 mies of my house and i live in a "nice" area. Librarys in particular are places these men hang out looking for victims and hoping some parent will give them an opportunity to start a conversation to begin contact for later or outright take the child. DO SOME HOMEWORK this is not paranoia It is what exists out there!! Hey FREERANGE Get your local list of the hundreds of offenders just within a 5 mile range of your house.... and if you still think that you want to take such a risk You are Nuts. It takes only one second to cause a lifetime of misery and grief when something happens. A moment you will regret for the rest of your life...if you think this is fear tactics you would be right if the research did not totally support the reality out their that we should be scared. We should be watchful or we are just sticking our heads in the sand....

I agree, I would not leave my child for a moment (I have a 3, 6 and 10 year old boy) you never know, and there are no second chances. I try not to stiffle them but always have a watchful eye when in a public place even a familiar library.

Never leave a 5-year-old kid alone in a public place--period.

I think that it is a tricky situation, you should be able to leave a child of a certain age at a library for 3 minutes, but look at Adam Walsh, right next to his parents in the Mall, and still someone took and killed him. I am a mother of two and would not leave my kids alone ina public place period. I might sound nuerotic, but at least I know for sure that at the end of the day, my kids are safe. As for asking the libraian to watch the kid, she didn't know the woman at all, and the kid is her responsablity, you don't pawn your kid off on a stranger anywhere for any amount of time.

Does Lenore even have a kid?
Your kids aren't the librarians responsibility they are yours and if you read the news at all you would know that on any given day kids go missing, are raped, murdered and robbed of their innocence by strangers and loved ones alike. People are sick and twisted and pretty darn brave about doing stuff in broad daylight. If you think 5 minutes is no big deal in bad guy time it's an eternity! My kids don't leave my sight in public! It only takes 1 second to have something happen. I teach them what is age appropriate at the time to stay safe without scaring the hell out of them with the STRANGER DANGER attitiude. I teach them the same things I do as an adult. Be aware of your surroundings and what is happening and know what to do in certain situations.

I agree totally. The librarian was working. Whose to say she wouldn't have to answer a phone or assist someone who enters while the mother is away for those three minutes? Libraries are public places, for heaven's sake. Seems to me the librarian was doing the mother a favor by reminding her that what may seem like a safe haven really is not. Would it have been such a problem for the mom to bring the child upstairs with her? She could carry her up if time was tight. It's sad that we live in a world where we can't leave our children alone for a few minutes, but that's reality.

Shes a librarian. Not a baby sitter. Sorry but it's not her job to watch someone elses kid.