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10 Common Autism Myths
Filed under: Medical Conditions, Special Needs
Our good friends at The Stir have created a place where moms can meet and talk about life, parenting and the parenting life. We think they have a lot of great stuff to say, and so we're thrilled to be offering some of their posts right here at ParentDish! Please give them a warm welcome.
Today's guest blogger is Katie Olson (aurorabunny), mom to 3-year old Brody, who has autism.
My friend wrote this and it really resonated with me. In honor of Autism Awareness Month, I wanted to share it with all of you.
Myth #1: Eye contact is impossible for someone with autism.
Some people with autism find making eye contact with others difficult, but others have no problem whatsoever.
Myth #2: People with autism can't show affection. My son is the biggest snuggle bug ever! Being able to snuggle up has never been a problem for him. For some, it is, but not all.
More from The Stir: The Stir: My Autism Story: Liz and Her Son Are Both on the Spectrum
Myth #3: If a child is progressing, he never had autism.
This is not true. It takes work and patience, but progress is possible!
Myth #4: People with autism cannot communicate.
If someone with autism is nonverbal, they have other ways of communicating. Sign language, pictures, computers, etc. are all forms of communication. Just because a person can't talk, it doesn't mean they can't communicate.
Myth #5: Autism is the result of bad or neglectful parenting.
The "refrigerator mother" myth has been around for some time, and I'm actually surprised it still exists. Almost every parent of a child with autism I've met is very kind, loving, and incredibly patient. They also spend much of their time feeling needlessly guilty about their child's autism, so this myth is less than helpful.
Myth #6: If you have autism, you can repeat the whole phone book or know what day of the week April 23 will fall on in four years.
While most children with autism are very smart, an autistic savant is rare. We can all thank the movie Rainman for this little myth. So in the future, please do not ask a mom to get her kid to perform parlor tricks for you.
More from The Stir: The Stir: What Really Causes Autism
Myth #7: Children with autism do not want friends.
All children want friends. Some can show this in a better way than others, but I think all children want a friend. A lot of kids with autism just can't figure out how to go about it.
Myth #8: Kids with autism don't get their feelings hurt.
If you've ever seen my son's face after a kid has refused to play with him, you'd know this is not true. They might not get mad and yell at someone, or sit down and cry over it, but it's just as easy to hurt a child-with-autism's feelings as any other. Please remind your children to be kind.
Myth #9: Better discipline would get their acts together.
Boy, do I love that one! I've been told on many occasions that all I need to do is spank him. Another good one, "Let me keep him for a few days, I'll fix him." You can't spank or yell autism away any easier than you can spank cancer away.
More from The Stir: The Stir: I Have Three Kids on the Autism Spectrum
Myth #10: If a person with autism can't communicate, he can't understand you either.
If someone tapes your mouth closed, do your ears plug up as well? Comprehension skills and expressive skills can develop at different speeds and often do with autism. Just because a child can not say "I love you" does not mean he doesn't hear you when you tell him you love him.
Related: More from The Stir
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ReaderComments (Page 1 of 1)
5-20-2010 @ 8:25PM
Cynthia said...So true! You nailed all the myths I have had to deal with from the time my son was diagnosed right on the head!
Reply
6-24-2010 @ 4:00PM
Ilene said...Thank you for debunking these myths. I'm "Mom" to 3 year old g/b twins both diagnosed with autism and find myself frustrated by those who just assume many of these myths are fact. Living with my kids, I know better. And I'm not going to even discuss some of the other myths that as an autism parent, I hear about all the time.
Reply
6-26-2010 @ 8:09PM
Mary said...Just a note to some of you who are striving to raise an autistic child or children.
At the time my sons were born, Autism was much less common, so every step was over unbroken ground. Today I see some of the supports availiable and am happy for how far understanding and treatment have come. Still, you can't fix stupid people who can't or won't believe that your child does not have a "behavioral" problem.
Both of my sons fall into the autistic spectrum, the older, now 28 is high functioning more on the Kanner's model. The younger, now 24 is Asperger's. Both graduated from public high school to the cheers and applause of their peers. Believe in your children, their unique talents, and learn to accept that their dreams for their lives will be different than the ones you imagined, but that each in his own way can find a happy and meamingful life. I work at an Emergency room, and many days I feel very blessed by the problems my children have never given me. My sons continue to learn and grow, many developmental steps take longer, but still they come. Enjoy your computer whiz, or calendar keeper, or trivia master. Whatever the interest, grow it! Both my sons have additional diagnosis that add complications, many of your children do too, where there is one developmental defect, multiple problems are common. Still, with your love they will thrive and grow into their own lives.
Reply
10-28-2010 @ 12:03AM
digger22 said...i not only raise an amazingly beautiful son with autism. he is just as bratty or huggable as any other child. myth #2 reminded me of a wonderful memory i'd like to share. my son didn't snuggle until 7 and i think he just didn't connect what joy quiet gentleness could bring. i rented the movie bionicals for our movie night and laid down on the couch and low and behold he just laid down with me. by the time the movie was over my side of the pillow was soaked with quiet tears of joy and i never had to pee so bad in my life. i wasn't willing to let one minute of that go where i finally held my child close and he was comfy with it. unfortunately he became severely addicted to the snuggle and i can't get him off me. oh dear, the price we pay for perfect love.
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10-31-2010 @ 12:15PM
radha said...I have a 14 year old very possessive boy who has been happy throughout his life except for the present.He was diagnosed with autism/PDD and we worked hard. He was placed right until 8th grade and now he is in a place where he feels they are not treating him good along with other special needs children. He was trained to keep up with his typical peers and now in the new school they think that he is not worth the teaching as they feel otherwise . He says change my class and give me challenges but they look at his weakness of repeating phrases from the past and they are slowing him. I am a mother who has brought him until today and I feel nothing is going to stop my son from what he wants to accomplish.