Divorce Lawyers: Facebook Tops in Online Evidence
Filed under: Divorce & Custody, In The News
Divorcing? Be careful what you expose online. Credit:Dan Kitwood, Getty Images
Oversharing on social networks has led to an overabundance of evidence in divorce cases. The American Academy of Matrimonial Lawyers says 81 percent of its members have used or faced evidence plucked from Facebook, MySpace, Twitter and other social networking sites, including YouTube and LinkedIn, over the last five years.
"Oh, I've had some fun ones," said Linda Lea Viken, president-elect of the 1,600-member group. "It's very, very common in my new cases."
Facebook is the unrivaled leader for turning virtual reality into real-life divorce drama, Viken said. Sixty-six percent of the lawyers surveyed cited Facebook foibles as the source of online evidence, she said. MySpace followed with 15 percent, followed by Twitter at 5 percent.
About one in five adults uses Facebook for flirting, according to a 2008 report by the Pew Internet and American Life Project. But it's not just kissy pix with the manstress or mistress that show up as evidence. Think of Dad forcing son to de-friend mom, bolstering her alienation of affection claim against him.
"This sort of evidence has gone from nothing to a large percentage of my cases coming in, and it's pretty darn easy," Viken said. "It's like, `Are you kidding me?'"
Neither Viken, in Rapid City, S.D., nor other divorce attorneys would besmirch the attorney-client privilege by revealing the identities of clients, but they spoke in broad terms about some of the goofs they've
encountered:
- Husband goes on Match.com and declares his single, childless status while seeking primary custody of said nonexistent children.
- Husband denies anger management issues but posts on Facebook in his "write something about yourself" section: "If you have the balls to get in my face, I'll kick your ass into submission."
- Father seeks custody of the kids, claiming (among other things) that his ex-wife never attends the events of their young ones. Subpoenaed evidence from the gaming site World of Warcraft tracks her there with her boyfriend at the precise time she was supposed to be out with the children. Mom loves Facebook's Farmville, too, at all the wrong times.
- Mom denies in court that she smokes marijuana but posts partying, pot-smoking photos of herself on Facebook.
The disconnect between real life and online is hardly unique to partners de-coupling in the United States. A DIY divorce site in the United Kingdom, Divorce-Online, reported the word "Facebook" appeared late last year in about one in five of the petitions it was handling. (The company's caseload now amounts to about 7,000.)
Divorce attorneys Ken and Leslie Matthews, a husband and wife team in Denver, Colo., don't see quite as many online gems. They estimated 1 in 10 of their cases involves such evidence, compared to a rare case or no cases at all in each of the last three years. Regardless, it's powerful evidence to plunk down before a judge, they said.
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"You're finding information that you just never get in the normal discovery process _ ever," Leslie Matthews said. "People are just blabbing things all over Facebook. People don't yet quite connect what they're saying in their divorce cases is completely different from what they're saying on Facebook. It doesn't even occur to them that they'd be found out."
Social networks are also ripe for divorce-related hate and smear campaigns among battling spousal camps, sometimes spawning legal cases of their own.
"It's all pretty good evidence," Viken said. "You can't really fake a page off of Facebook. The judges don't really have any problems letting it in."
The attorneys offer these tips for making sure your out-loud personal life online doesn't wind up in divorce court:
WHAT YOU SAY CAN AND WILL BE HELD AGAINST YOU
If you plan on lying under oath, don't load up social networks with evidence to the contrary.
"We tell our clients when they come in, `I want to see your Facebook page. I want you to remember that the judge can read that stuff so never write anything you don't want the judge to hear,'" Viken said.
BEWARE YOUR FRENEMIES
Going through a divorce is about as emotional as it gets for many couples. The desire to talk trash is great, but so is the pull for friends to take sides.
"They think these people can help get them through it," said Marlene Eskind Moses, a family law expert in Nashville, Tenn., and current president of the elite academy of divorce attorneys. "It's the worst possible time to share your feelings online."
A PICTURE MAY BE WORTH ... BIG BUCKS
Grown-ups on a good day should know better than to post boozy, carousing or sexually explicit photos of themselves online, but in the middle of a contentious divorce? Ken Matthews recalls photos of a client's partially naked estranged wife alongside pictures of their kids on Facebook.
"He was hearing bizarre stories from his kids. Guys around the house all the time. Men running in and out. And there were these pictures,"
Matthews said.
PRIVACY, PRIVACY, PRIVACY
They're called privacy settings for a reason. Find them. Get to know them. Use them. Keep up when Facebook decides to change them.
Viken tells a familiar story: A client accused her spouse of adultery and he denied it in court. "The guy testified he didn't have a relationship with this woman. They were just friends. The girlfriend hadn't put security on her page and there they were. `Gee judge, who lied to you?'"
Copyright 2010 The Associated Press. The information contained in the AP news report may not be published, broadcast, rewritten or otherwise distributed without the prior written authority of The Associated Press. All active hyperlinks have been inserted by AOL. This article was written by LEANNE ITALIE, Associated Press Writer.
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ReaderComments (Page 1 of 4)
7-05-2010 @ 8:24PM
U B Cool 2 said...I love the morons of the world posting on these sites, wanting to connect to every Dick and Jane on the planet. Posting crap for bragging rights, to impress, or just want to fit in, see what I did. If you are stupid with no common scense, it makes my job easier. Because it will bite you on the butt. A wise person says nothing, nothing to tip their hand.
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7-06-2010 @ 12:09PM
David said...I cant stand facebook, people say " Oh its just to stay in touch with my friends!" If they were your good friends they would just email you or call you !
Facebook is just a ego trip for all those sad people who are weak little sheep, who want whatever the person in front orders at starbucks, they believe Fox News and everything they are spoon-fed by society.
The type who rush out and get the Anti Swine flu injection,
Rather then them me I say! If they want to be a sheep' then let them, me ??? I´´m a leader not a believer ! Facebook, HELL NO!!!!!!!!!!
7-05-2010 @ 8:38PM
angie said...It would be pretty easy to create a false facebook page in your partners name, and write and say whatever you wanted posing as your partner etc. to SCREW them over - especially if you were contemplating divorce for some time.
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7-05-2010 @ 9:49PM
Ms. Max said...You are so correct on that. Face Book admin is not asking for finger prints. And I know that any one can make up a fake profile and get friends to go along with their fake profile and damaging status.
7-05-2010 @ 9:54PM
Ms. Max said...You are so correct on that. Face Book admin is not asking for finger prints. And I know that any one can make up a fake profile and get friends to go along with their fake profile and damaging status.
7-06-2010 @ 2:29AM
Kevin Hayes said...And just as easy to find your IP address thereby quickly ending your reign of terror.
7-06-2010 @ 5:30AM
k said...they can track which computer it came from
7-05-2010 @ 8:48PM
Ali said...I know a guy who placed a personal ad on Match.com, using he and his wife's joint credit card to pay for it. Not surprisingly, she divorced him. What a moron!
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7-05-2010 @ 8:48PM
Harve said...Face book,is for losers, like people that text crap on their cell phone instead of just dialing up and talking.
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7-06-2010 @ 12:11AM
Jane Doe said...You obviously don't have enough friends or family members who give a damn about how you are doing in life. And, the fact that you don't have friends explains all the extra time you have on your hands to be on the phone talking for hours about nothing at all with your mother, who is the only one who pretends to care.
7-06-2010 @ 1:02AM
shoenightwolf said...yeah right ^^ because you text and go on facebook automatically means you have "friends" and just cause some one is against it, it means they don't have friends and only talks to their mom. wow, give yourself a pat on the back you idiot... turning your logic around was about as easy as taking candy from a baby. GIVE IT UP FOR JANE DOE EVERYBODY!!!
7-06-2010 @ 2:37AM
BeaLachiqitaBoricua said...Facebook is not stupid. Its just another form of communication and many enjoy it. It is a way of networking and connecting with people you usually wouldn't have access to and a way of sharing with friends and family. It doen't have to be for everybody. Why does anyone care what anyone else does? I f people like social networking sites, let them... so many different kinds of people do so you can't just generalize. If its not for you and you prefer the old fashion letter and phone call... then thats good too. To each his own. Why are people so tense and judgemental?
7-06-2010 @ 5:27AM
sal said...Amen to that statement. I might add...."vulgar, arrogant, and illitterate persons"
7-05-2010 @ 8:50PM
Lauren said...The media has pried far too much into public life. This story would have been better left out. I guess I didn't realize the media were all for defending/helping those who are morally wrong. Disgusting.
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7-05-2010 @ 9:10PM
Lisa said...And how, pray tell, does one pry into public life. The very definition of public is that it is out there for all to see. It's like the morons who post pictures of themsleves drunk or taking bong hits on Facebook and then act surprised that they don't get hired after a really superficial background check.
If someone is dumb enough to post pictures of themselves doing inappropriate things on the internet, then they are probably too dumb to actually read and remember these helpful articles.
7-05-2010 @ 10:35PM
Illidian Kode said...I like how you make a mass generalization of "the media" as if they are a collective, unified group with a single agenda. In truth though, I find it curious that you are offended by a post outlining how when you make private issues public, they can be used against you in a court of law. I'm not sure exactly what about this article you think is supposed to be private. Every example used in this piece is an example of poor judgement by people who chose to make an issue "public." Perhaps, you are offended that people are being made aware of how their legal system interacts with current technology. Perhaps, you are against people being made aware of their rights under their own legal system. I don't know, but it really is startling to hear someone complain about "the media" explaining to citizens about due process and what can and cannot be used against them.
7-06-2010 @ 12:02AM
Kelly said..."Evidence" what a funny word to be used by the Associated Press, are they sure they know the meaning? I find it very hard to believe the accuracy of the associate who wrote this article especially when they state "The American Academy of Matrimonial Lawyers says 81 percent of its members have used or faced evidence plucked from Facebook, MySpace, Twitter and other social networking sites, including You Tube and Linkedin" I'm from Texas and there is no law against adultery, so I'm wondering as large as Texas is, how we only make up 19 percent of The American Academy of Matrimonial Lawyers. With the manipulation of programs like Photoshop or Paint Shop Pro, you can add or take away anyone in a picture, so I find it hard to believe that these digital pictures would be admissible in any court of law. And shall we approach the idea that anyone can make a fake profile, to be monitored from any computer, including those at local libraries? Illidian Kode, you can't understand mass generalization of the "the media" when you, in trying to defend the Associated Press or the media is a typical example how a false pretense of what is supposed to be the facts get spread. "Explaining to citizen about due process what can and cannot be used against them" ??? First rule of thumb that everyone needs to remember is that not all 50 states share the same laws, especially when it comes to divorce laws or family laws.
7-06-2010 @ 1:17AM
Matthew said...Kelly, Texas has both no-fault and fault divorce. Your grounds (or reasons) for wanting a divorce are set out in a document called a Petition for Divorce that you file with your District court in your county. Once the Decree of Divorce is granted (i.e. the judge approves your divorce), you will become an unmarried person again. Appropriate grounds for divorce in Texas are: 1) cruelty; 2) adultery; 3) conviction of a felony (imprisoned for at least 1 year without a pardon); 4) abandonment (for at least 1 year); 5) living apart (without cohabitation for 3 years); and/or 6) confinement in a mental hospital (for at least 3 years). These factors are important as evidence because it is what the judge uses when ruling on the specific terms of a settlement agreement. In other words, adultery is grounds to lose or limit custody of children and property in divorce settlements.
7-06-2010 @ 2:35AM
BeaLachiqitaBoricua said...This article does not only help the immoral. It makes people think twice about anything that could possibly be used against them. I don't think the author intends to help criminals and adulterers. I think it was meant as more of a wake up call for social networkers and entertainment.
7-05-2010 @ 11:53PM
kelly n said...when people post photos of themselves doing things they shouldn't be doing or in bad taste - there is a part (LARGE) of them that are using a third entity (the computer) to get caught! These are cowardly people, with no constitution of morals or truth - better to confront the other person(s) and be a grown up about what you want then to hide behind the front of the camera! K
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