Does the Dog Have Dibs on My Grandma's Name?

by The Name Lady (Subscribe to The Name Lady's posts)
Jul 8th 2010 11:00AM

Filed under: Relatives, Baby Names, Funny Stuff

My grandmother's name was Annabelle, and I was very close to her and would love to pay tribute with my daughter's name. Recently, my friends got a puppy and named her Bella. When I mentioned it, people have asked why I would want the same name for my baby as a dog. Is there a way to address this in a day when people are taking dog names from baby books?!

- Bella Lover

If a dog steals your grandma's name, you have the right to steal the dog's name, don't you think? Fair is fair.

Seriously, a name with genuine, deep personal significance should never be derailed by a pet. There's a pecking order when it comes to names being "taken," and the number one spot is occupied by parents honoring someone who was important in their lives. In fact, you could name your baby after your beloved grandmother even if the other Bella were your friend's daughter, not her puppy.

Namesakes get extra leeway. They can even override basic principles like the "first come, first served" rule. For instance, if two sisters married men named Kyle, they could each name a son Kyle Jr. if they desired.

This namesake exception is narrowly defined. It has to be somebody you want to honor because you loved the person, not just because you love the name. Merely finding a Great-Great-Great Uncle Silas on your family tree doesn't give you special rights to duplicate the taken name Silas. Creative offshoots don't count, either -- your Uncle Mel doesn't give you a dispensation to copy your best friend's baby name Melisande.

As with all delicate social situations, approach the namesake exception thoughtfully. It doesn't outweigh the demands of sensitivity or common sense. If a dear friend next door is hurt by the thought of sharing her child's name, try to find another way to honor your loved one.

As for your friends' reaction that the name now means "dog" to them, I wouldn't worry. Once they get to know your daughter, that will all melt away.

How would you deal with name conflicts with friends -- or their pets? Share your experiences here. And if you have your own question to Ask the Name Lady, drop her a line!

Related: Do We Need New Baby Name Etiquette?

ReaderComments (Page 1 of 3)

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7-08-2010 @ 1:03PM

dougalcandy said...

Get real and get over your sense of entitlement!! Number one, your friends are not family members and shouldn't have to be sensitive to your choice of baby names. What if your friend's grandmother's name was Annabelle too, would it mean she couldn't name her own child that? Second, Annabelle and Bella are two different names. Bella is usually short for Isabella. Maybe your friends are Twilight fans. Due to the popularity of the "Twilight" series, there are baby Bella's all over the place. So sorry all those people weren't sensitive to your overblown sense of importance!

7-08-2010 @ 3:39PM

Simzee said...

This lady's getting all bent out of shape over a name? My parents NEVER named me. Perhaps this lady should'nt be saying anything at all.

7-09-2010 @ 8:44PM

Kelly said...

I wanted to name my daughter Heidi but my brother got a dog a few months before my baby was born. He named his dog Heidi. Like a fool, I dumped the name Heidi because I refused to name my daughter after my brother's dog. The dog has been dead for 35 years. My daughter is still here and well and NOT named the name I wanted for her.

7-08-2010 @ 3:30PM

K said...

dougalcandy - Read before you speak. She wasn't the one that had the problem - her friends did. She doesn't care that the dog has the same name that she plans on naming her daughter, she just doesn't want to answer to people who think that she shouldn't because she knows a dog with the same name.

You are the one that's a little "overblown". Chill out

Diana said...

The friend did not name her puppy after the writer's grandmother. She named the puppy after the heroine of the ridiculously popular series of vampire books called "Twilight" by Stephenie Meyer. Bella is currently the most popular name for baby girls for the same reason.
If I were the writer, I'd go with Annabelle for the same reasons she wants to use it, and I would not shorten it to Bella to retain the name's emotional integrity.

7-08-2010 @ 7:50PM

falkowskic said...

Gee Whiz!!!!! what's the difference? Our dogs were named Sally, Hester, Lucy, and Samantha. When we get our next puppy, she will be Maggie. Lots of people give their pets human names. Are we nuts? I like to think so. My dogs have always been furry family members. There, now you have something else to write about.

Bella is not the traditional nickname for Annabelle, posters are right, it's coming from Twilight. Is this kid even born or is she theoretical and if so, why are you so hot and bothered now? And trust me, if she is born, she will know you are calling her and not the neighbor's dog. Who are these weird people with whom you associate? And why are they so concerned about your daughter's name?

7-10-2010 @ 3:31PM

urpointis said...

Get over it the dog will die, no one will remember bella the dog

7-08-2010 @ 3:38PM

Lesley Lightner said...

I use several baby name books for our pets. Your letter is the stupidest thing I have read in a long time. The previous commenter was spot on with his/her remarks. Our dogs are Stella, Linzi, Olivia, Isabelle and Norah. Our cats are Cammie, Casper, Austin, Emma, Clementine, Clayton and Trinity. I hate people who can't come up with more imaginative names for their pets than "Smokey" for a gray cat, "Midnight" or worse, "Blackie" for a black cat, Fluffy, etc etc. I just might use Annabelle one of these days when I don't have an Isabelle any more. When we got Norah, our new puppy, a friend said to me, "You come up with the best names for your animals." I consider that high praise.

7-08-2010 @ 8:43PM

Brenda Whitley said...

I like having different kinds of names for my pets and my grandkids. My cats are all name with the last name of Cat, Baby Cat ,Mama Cat ,Fuzzy Cat, Cowboy Cat etc. My dogs are Malamutes and are named, ShaSha(mama), Bear Dog(the Dad) Pups Scully, Bandit , Mouse, and Daisy. My grandkids are Colt Wade, Darnell Renee, Barron Royce, Echo Rose, Great Grands are Brooke, Paxton, Zandra Marie, Joseph Moses, and Xoe Michelle.

martie said...

Since so many girls are Belle right now, and if she really wanted to shorten it she could use Anna...

7-08-2010 @ 3:47PM

lara said...

Get over it. If that is the name you want, name your child that. How
many Jennifers and Susans went through school together.

As for having the same name as a dog...I was suppose to be name Holly after my mom's cat. My dad would not ear of it so she picked Laura - after her favorite siameese, for which he never found out.

It is the name your child will live with, not the dog!

7-08-2010 @ 3:54PM

I admit we did have a cat "Little One" and Maxwell, but we also have a BoBo, Little Bit**y Girl (because she won't stop talking/complaining), Alexander the Great, Ivan The Terrible (twins that are actually opposite the names), Tar Tar (yes for the black cat), Heather for the dog, and Samantha Rae and Jack for the snakes.... I won't even get into all the spiders, except to say Cocoa Puff for the Bird Eater, which was the size of a diner plate and looked loke two puffs stuck together, when she was little.

7-08-2010 @ 3:56PM

valleygirl said...

We've had two people name their children "after" our pets. Both of them asked if we minded (ha ha). The first was our family dog "Molly". The second was my dog "Eli". I don't think I have to worry about my current dog's name being snatched - not many "Peanuts" entering Kindergarten these days!

7-08-2010 @ 4:33PM

Peanut said...

There are really a few of us that go by the name "Peanut" altho' it be a nickname. It serves us well.

7-08-2010 @ 4:03PM

Frannie Fay said...

When I was 18 ( back in 1985) I was given a toy poodle as a graduation gift from a boyfriend. I named her Emily-Ann. I thought ( and still do) think it's a cute name. Years later my sister in law wanted to name her daughter, Emily Ann but was so offended that I named my dog that ( 20 years earlier) that she felt she had to, "scold" me for naming my dog that. How was I to know that the name Emily would become popular. She ended up naming her daughter something else, but my dog was already passed for serveral years. Her loss, I always look up names in a baby book and name my animals. I have had/have animals named Tabitha, Sabrina, Calvin, Emily-Ann, Casey, Gretchen, Max, Ernie. Some people get so offened by everything, just deal with it, they need a thicker skin.

7-08-2010 @ 5:45PM

Marcia said...

When my daughter found out she was expecting a girl she complained to me about using up the good name Morgan for my kitten, who was a year old at the time. We all thought it was funny. I emailed her a message that I had talked with Morgan the cat and said he would be delighted to have her child named after him. However, she picked a different name

7-08-2010 @ 4:19PM

Jim said...

Interesting. The first time I ever heard the name "Bella" was, you guessed it, a dog. This was back in the 60's. So, who borrowed the name from who? By my experience, this woman is "stealing" a dog's name for her daughter. Because I had a cat named Willy and one named Suzie doesn't mean any disrespect to any person of the same name. And no one, not even vaulted McDonald's which claims Mc and Mac belong to them, can't prevent the use of the name on people. Nobody will confuse the relationship either. Conclusion? Get over it lady! And get a life while you're at it.

7-08-2010 @ 4:07PM

NLHORTON said...

I worked on a team of 11 women. We had 4 Nancy's, 2 Barb's 2 Susans. The Bar'bs and the Susans had the same initials even. Some names are popular. You don't own them because you like them. Grow up. Get a life. You are not the center of the universe. You have rights to choices. so do your friends.
Thank God every day that you have nothing more earth- shattering than what someone named a puppy.

7-08-2010 @ 4:16PM

GiGi said...

My daughter's name is Bella. It isn't short for anything, it is just Bella. Both my husband and I are italian and had always wanted Italian names for our kids. And we loved Bella because it means beautiful in Italian. We knew way before I had even gotten pregnant that if we had a daughter, we would name her Bella. A couple who we are friendly with, whose daughter was born 3 months before I got pregnant, named their daughter Isabella. They call her Bella. We had never discussed baby names with them and it was nothing to us. I found out I was pregnant and towards the end the husband was discussing his daughter with my husband and asked if we had names picked out. My husband said that we had found out we were having a girl and that we were naming her Bella. Well, the other husband said to my husband, are you serious? How can you do that, we named our daughter Isabella and we call her Bella for short. My husband said how we had talked about it a few years before and always knew we would name our daughter Bella. Needless to say, this other couple was not happy and they made a huge deal out of it. We still named our daughter Bella...and as for them, well, they got over it. We didn't have back up names...Bella was Bella way before any of us had a Bella. So I don't think what I did was wrong.

7-08-2010 @ 4:14PM

me said...

i don't think annabell and bella are the same, my sisters name is isabella and we call her bella.

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