Opinion: There Is No Such Thing As Birth Rape

To the woman claiming to be a nurse, I highly doubt that, because if you were, then you never say what you said. I am a mother of 2 beautiful girls, one of them was induced, the other was a month early, neither time in my labor with them did I ever feel like I was raped by my doctor or the nurses. Now when a relative of mine molested me as a child, THAT was rape. Giving birth to a child, no matter the circumstance IS NOT RAPE. Giving birth to a child is a beautiful experience that not all women get to have so if you can have children, count your blessings and stop calling giving birth to a child "RAPE".

Heather, As a nurse you should know that medical exams are consenual, because the person is there for that exam. Why would someone go in for an anuual well woman checkup and say not to put nething inside? The whole point is to look inside lol That wouldnt make any sense. When you go in to the gyn for a routine check up he/she will be putting their hands around and in there and that is what you came to the dr for so it is not against consent=not rape. When you go to the hospital they will be checking you to see progress and unless you say, No dont check me, it is consenual. Why go to the hospital if you dont want their help. Again doesnt make sense. Child birth in itself is not a violation or abuse because it was a choice. Either a choice to have a planned pregnancy or a choice to keep an unplanned pregnancy...at some point the woman had to know how the baby would come out (there are only 2 ways lol) and accepted it, because if not they should not have made the choice to have a baby. Of course if the dr is grossly out of line then it could be a violation or abuse akin to rape but if its a routine exam that you came in for, be it labor or anything else, it is not. To me it seems like common sense. But then again most Americans dont have any lol

Heather, you must be a nutcase. One thing for certain is you certainly aren't a nurse and if you are, by slim chance, you need a different career. .

Val, in her response to Heather, says that "had two babies and felt very uncomfortable about the amount of people who had their hands up me." And then some story about a janitor in the hallway, soup, and yada yada yada.... If you are uncomfortable about those hands, then squat in a field to have your baby. But if you elevate this to the level of rape, then you don't know what rape is. And if Heather (I'm not convinced she is a health professional) views this as rape, then she is in the wrong profession. I suggest the two of you volunteer to council TRUE rape victims and maybe then you'll know the difference. Frankly, I can't believe any woman would write this garbage, and any woman would agree with it. It isn't only men who have sick ideas about rape....

goodness you guys, I think what Heather said was someone FORCEFULLY putting their fingers 'down there'. As the person may say stop or something and they don't. Some of these comments are so silly and rude. Come on and think before you type.

A solution for you is NOT to have any type of female exam and hope you never get a medical problem. Second, do NOT get pregnant. As a woman who has had regular childbirth, a C-Section and been a rape victim, I can tell you there is a BIG difference. I pray that you never become a victim of sexual violence but I can promise you that YOU WILL DEFINITELY KNOW THE DIFFERENCE between rape and an exam.

Heather, for one thing doctor's don't force their fingers into one's vagina during medical examinations, and they'll normally advise you beforehand what they are about to do. There's quiet a bit of difference. I suppose you haven't ever been raped to be able to distinguish the difference. I'll admit it's a little embarassing for medical personnel seeing your privates but that's the extent of it. Rape is a vicious act, with the intent to bring emotional, mental and physical harm upon the victim. It has nothing to do with sexual pleasure, it's about overpowering another. Although one may feel powerless when giving birth, it is nothing in comparison to one being raped.

Of all the silly, unnecessary, crybaby BS... Birth Rape? What in God's name are women now days thinking? How can you even exist in today's society and NOT know what is physically required by both mother and doctor during a birth. So, if doing what is required during a difficult is to be considered rape, why in the world would you want to have a baby? Unless you come from a totally underdeveloped country and have never read a book or seen a t.v., you are as prepared for the birthing process as any one can be.. Stop sniveling about pain and violation, step up with the rest of us real women and get the job done. Otherwise, select a surrogate to have all your babies..As a victim of both rape and as a woman who has given birth 3 times, I assure you that there is absolutely no comparison between rape and birth, even a traumatic birth.

You are a nurse???? You MUST be kidding.

I have been both raped, and had an emergency c-section, neither one is like the other, Comparing the two is just idiotic nonsense.

I agree, this rape term is rediculous. When I had my second child there was pain. A LOT of pain. It was differnt from my first, while longer..I dont remember it hurting as much..When I got to the hospitol the nurse made a mistake and said I was at 10 and wouldnt give me an epi. I was scared probably as much as it hurt. So I panicked. when my ob came in..I was acting a fool. they were telling me to push and I said..hell no, and refused to push, I wouldnt let the docter near me. so he did what he had to do. he came up and forced me to be checked to find out where I was and where the baby was..come to find out I was only 7...and could have the epi. Am I mad at my docter for forcing a check on me? hell no he was doing his job, he had to do what he had to do to help me and my baby. two hours later I had a beautiful baby girl! who will be a year old next month! the point of this story is, docters should be able to do what they need to do to help you and your baby, and not feel afraid that they will be sued or worse.

It is NOT REASONABLE that a woman has to give up control of her body at ANY TIME. This is not okay thinking!! It's one thing if you are having medical issues that need addressing (still your choice whether you want them addressed) versus the doctor's Cover Your Ass attitude about birht and delivery these days. There is no reason that they have to check to see if you're dilated, midwives have been delivering for years without constantly checking. If Doctor's paid more attention to the natural birthing process instead of trying to get involved, they would know how to read the mothers better, too.

you mean "lose" instead of "loose".... please try to get your spelling right. stupid spelling mistakes don't reflect well on you or your argument.

the state of giving birth in the United States these days is a business. typically, the doctor/nurses MAIN focus during l&d ISN'T the mother and baby (or babies...). instead, it's about the money being made, the time it takes to deliver the baby, and this is just plain WRONG.

while the term "birth rape" isn't something I necessarily agree with, because of the fact that I've never been pregnant I do not feel it is appropriate of me to give my opinion about it. all I know is that after hearing/reading HUNDREDS of hellish birth stories, we (the USA) are NOT leading the world when it comes to women-friendly medicine. instead, we punish women and we are NOT concerned about the mother/child relationship, but that's another topic for another time....

Ms Lisa-are doctors and nurses supposed to do ilt for free? Would that satisfy you? No matter how much they get paid, some don't care and some do no matter what you are in the hospital for. I was damn lucky to have caring nuses in the Cleveland Clinic in Weston, Florida when I had an appendectomy in March. Don't tell me that there are no caring professionals. I could tell you in any profession, people are there because they want the job or they hate the job, but want the money. Get a better argument especially when you never had a kid to begin with!!!!

Christina, i totally agree with you. Being raped was the worst thing that ever happened to me and it still feels like a bad dream....the term birth rape is offensive and cruel. Having my son was the best experience of my life. I had an emergency c-section and obviously the term emergency means i wasnt planning on it. I didnt want to have major surgery but that didnt matter. i would die for my son, so i had the c-section. Even tho i didnt want a c-section, my birth experience and my rape experience are completely separate and on opposite side of my thoughts, never would i compare the two. Having a doctor exam you, even if its uncomfortable is NOTHING COMPARED TO HAVING A DISGUSTING MAN FORCE HIS PENIS INSIDE YOUR BODY. WHILE YOUR SCREAMING AND ASKING HIM TO STOP. HE KEEPS GOING AND HURTS YOU EVEN MORE. ok ms lisa, kirsten and heather. go to hell you dumb women!!! your making us look bad enough

Ms Lisa: that is fine if someone KNOWS all sides of the delivery process. These days, we DO have people who sensationalize AND who look for reasons to sue The truely informed know what to expect & the true key is to find a dr with whom you have a good & trusting relationship. THEY ARE OUT THERE! And, there are COMPSASSIONATE NURSES and nurses who ADVOCATE for patients. There ARE many things happening with costs being such and issue. A person's best approach is 1) use protection & don't have a baby until you're as ready as you possibly can be. 2) Don't be, or erroneously see yourself as, a victim; many people like this role and being dependent; and they like blaming others for things that happen in their lives. 3) Make sure you have a support system. 4) This new term, I agree, is very bad and mere rhetoric for people who want a reaction from others. If something truely is out-of-order, then, call it what it is. 5) Be responsible for your own health & well-being. FRIVOLOUS LAWSUITS ARE ONE OF THE REASONS WHY MEDICAL COSTS ARE HIGH, TOO