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Dad in Egyptian Custody Case: 'My Children Today Were Not My Children'
Filed under: Divorce & Custody, News, In The News, Weird But True, New In Pop Culture
Colin Bower has fought tirelessly for the right to see his two sons ever since his ex-wife allegedly kidnapped them and took them back to her home country of Egypt more than a year ago. But a reunion there this week between the father and his boys was more heartbreaking than joyful.
Bower, 41, met with Noor, 9, and Ramsay, 7, for the first time since the kids disappeared from Manchester, Mass., 13 months ago, the Boston Globe reports, but the distraught dad says the boys treated him like a stranger.
"I can tell you this has been the worst day of my life,'' Bower tells the Globe shortly before traveling back to the United States. "My children today were not my children. ... They said they didn't want to be near me."
Bower met with his two sons for about 30 minutes, and was accompanied by the U.S. consulate general. According to the Globe, his former wife, Mirvat El-Nady, and members of her family also were present. The two divorced in 2008, and Bower won sole custody of the boys.
El-Nady is accused of kidnapping the boys during a visitation in August 2009. Bower says he arrived at Nady's home to pick up Noor and Ramsay for a trip to Maine, but they were gone. A warrant for Nady's arrest was issued by a Massachusetts court. Her name also appears on an Interpol alert.
She allegedly used forged Egyptian passports to board a plane headed for Egypt, where lawmakers have made it difficult for Bower to see his sons. He has requested to see them on six other occasions, and has obtained local counsel to help him navigate the legal system.
When Bower got word over the weekend that he would be able to see his boys, he dropped everything to get on a plane, accompanied by his mother. He brought with him a bag stuffed with gifts, and told reporters at the airport he hoped to take his sons back home with him.
Instead, two days later, he was visibly shaken, the Globe reports.
"They said they didn't like America, they liked it here'' in Egypt, Bower says, adding that he wept during the visit, and told the boys "this is an adult problem between Mommy and Daddy."
In a heart-rending interview with "Today" co-host Matt Lauer, Bower says it was obvious Noor and Ramsay were coached by their mother.
"It's clearly child abuse," he tells Lauer. "They've been kidnapped. They were clearly being told what to say. They were told they were going to be watched, and they were told they were going to be held accountable for what they did in the meeting."
During the half-hour Bower was with his boys, he says he looked for an emotional reunion that was not to be realized.
"I was down on one knee; I was looking for an embrace, I was looking for any sense of connection," he tells "Today." "They completely avoided me."
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ReaderComments (Page 1 of 1)
9-28-2010 @ 6:46PM
bb&j said...this is very sad , but happens all to often. the major diffrence is that parental alienation can be done right under your very own nose. it's terrible that parents can be so selfish that they don't care about their kids, and will do anything to harm their former spouse and thats the same person the a little while ago they were proffessing love for. I wishn this father good luck because he will need it.
Reply
10-05-2010 @ 11:26AM
liz said...I agree. My parents did it to me while divorcing while i was growing up and now i hate both of them. My my mother would say stuff like "My, you're getting more like your father every day," whenever I misbehaved. Even now that I'm an adult she STILL talks negatively about him. Doesn't she realize that it makes me think less of her, as well as him? Moral of story: watch how you treat your children, guys.
10-05-2010 @ 6:55AM
I'm Wondering said...I'm just wondering, what were the court's reasons, or according to the father, Mr. Bower, why the mother lost all custody in their divorce?
Why was Mr. Bower considered the better parent? Was there some inherent fault with the mother? Was it because she was insane, a manipulator, who acted out of self-interest and not the two childrens' best interests? Hmmmmm - had to be something adverse going on in the mother, to lose both kids to Mr. Bower in Massachusetts in 2009...
Reply
10-05-2010 @ 8:41AM
BES said...Sounds like the mother has brain washed the kids, probably making up stories about the father. I hope the father brings the two kids back home. Good Luck.
Reply
10-05-2010 @ 9:33AM
Beebop said...Control freak patriarch dudes shop overseas for a woman more 'tractable' and subservient than American women, who won't put up with their infantile crap, then get upset when she hashad all she can stand of him and goes home, taking the kids with her.
You get what you pay for.
Reply
10-27-2010 @ 2:35PM
sherri said...Really ??? Beebop you were there and know how they met.. how about some compassion for the boys and their father..are you so callous that you cant care for others or are you so sad and alone that you cant see the hurt there..SHAME on you!
10-28-2010 @ 5:03PM
cassandra said...Sorry, but while Beebop may have put it too harshly, he is really onto something. Some American men really do go shopping for "real women" from other countries. And then when things go wrong, they come begging those strong, strident American broads to help them.
10-05-2010 @ 12:25PM
guyrightz said...Got to say this is common. The woman can keep the kids away from the father for years in this country and nothing can be done. Try it Ive been in this situation for 10 years now. You can take ur ex back to court over and over continuation after continuation. You can ask for a phone # or address at one court case and the courts will tell you thats another court case! Its all BS and parental Alienation. I found my oldest on facebook and yes the mother in most cases will fill the kids minds with lies about the father and yes the kids will hate the father. Ive wrtten a book for fathers and stepmothers called "STUPID GUY IN THE MIDWEST" find out about it on facebook. Look up the books name. We as fathers and stepmothers have a right to live a life too??????
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10-08-2010 @ 5:36PM
Milancy said...What a very sad story. This happens right here in the U.S. Parents use children as pawns and have no respect for both sides of the chilren's lives. They are innocent in all of this. My family has experienced this very thing. The poor children have no idea who our family is, other than we are bad or evil. They look at us with fear in their eyes. One day..... we all answer for our wrongdoings. The day is coming, one day.
Colin stay strong! Many of us understand your pain.
Reply
10-11-2010 @ 3:06AM
Roberta said...Back in the early 80's, I watched a program, "Oprah"! "Mother's Without Custody"
10-27-2010 @ 1:47PM
Annie said...Well before you marry someone from another country you should stop and think what you are doing. This very thing happens more than you know.
Reply
12-03-2010 @ 12:14PM
Eileen said...This mother is an International criminal. PERIOD. She stole these children and now she has turned them against their father. That is criminal. The government of Egypt isn't helping the matter. The mother should be brought back to the US and tried as a criminal.
Reply