My Grandson's Meltdowns Are Wearing Us Out!

I am the youngest of 7 children. My mother used to say the best thing you can teach a child is the meaning of the word no. One time my sister threw a tamtrum because she wanted something and my mother told her no. She no more hit the floor and started her kicking and screaming and my mother had hold of her. She got an old fashion spanking (and I don't mean beating) and my mother told her if she ever did it again she would get some more. She never did it again. Our mother taught us that we had to respect the wisdom of our parents. They had already been down the road that we were going to travel. Kids that grow up thinking that throwing tantrums will get them what they want, will grow up doing what ever they have to do to get what they want. Very selfish and without respect for anyone or anything. My father lived to be 91 and my mother passed away last year at the age of 99 1/2. We loved and respected our parents because they loved us enough to discipline us when we needed it. If you love your child you must give them structure and discipline them with LOVE. Guide them into life or they will not have a map to go by. They may be upset at the time but they will thank you for it later.

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If his tantrums seem to be beyond the pale as far as tantrums go, it may not be garden variety tantrums-major severe behavioral meltdowns can be a warning sign of autism. Either way, tantrums defintely occur when children are feeling completely stressed out and act as their own depressurization valve. Look for the early warning signs that this child has reached their limit-this means that you may have to curtail your schedule or activity. Also, it is beneficial to help your child develop coping skills for waiiting in line, riding in the ca, etc.

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this so called phycodoctor is an educated moron JUST SAY NO IT WORKS BEST

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The problem is that children act as if they were raised by a pack of politicly correct Psychotherapist. Look, it doesn't hurt a thing to give em a swat on the behind. Also,take a toy for a day, or put the child in time out, sometimes a mixture of thing's. Use common sense and give structure with a mixture of punishment. These little children will become a BIG problem later in life if one doesn't deal with these problems early.Some young adult's seem spoiled with very little respect for anyone. Most were raised with the idea that making a child mind with some spanking, and teaching and maybe losing a favorite toy, was a ancient ole fashioned theory. Being totally passive has a price as much as doing nothing at all. I have raised two Boy's, using understanding and Discipline . Spanking a child isn't fun, but if you love your child and want he or she to become a well mannered, well adjusted happy teen then adult is a must.

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I have a very defiant 3 year old that sounds just like the grandson here and I find that giving him options and the illusion he is in control helps tremendously. For instance rather than saying"OK time to get your jacket on" to which he will fight me and refuse saying he doesn't need one, I'll ask "do you want to wear your red jacket or green jacket' to which I get an answer and result of jacket being put on with no problems. Only provide two options you have already picked out making it super easy for them to decide and feel like they are in 'control'

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nothiing wrong to turn that brat around and spank his little butt,, then hold him and let hin know u love him,, but u wont tolerate his behavior,, but unfortunatly in this country , if u only dream of spanking your child or grand child,, you will end up in jail,, no wonder we endup raising a nation of spoiled brats that get theri way all their life,,and unfortunatly go to adulthood doing the same,,,maybe oneday , we will wake up smell the coffee,, and quit being so politically correct,,

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Time for the board of education to meet the seat of learning. Spank his butt and put him in time out, all day if thats what it takes.

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I'm ok with explanation but when it comes right down to it the child should know that if the fit continues he will be paddled. Reasoning with a 4 your old is ridiculous. "Spare the rod, spoil the child!" There will always be consequences to their actions.

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you people have to be kidding, you are adults on here whinnying about having to listen to other peoples kids.
Grow up and give helpful advice or shut up!!
My 2 year old acts up and has fits also and hitting his bottom does nothing! yelling at him does nothing! making him sit or time out does nothing! some kids are just different and need a different method to control them. And no I am not a bad parent I also have a 16 year old that never had a fit she was a good kid, you never seen her get mad when she was younger she did not even go though the terrible twos and I raise them the same the only different is that my son has a father that yells and screams in front him and when I got rid of him my son got better but still has fits and wants his way. there are reasons for kids behaviors and yes sometime the kids are just spoiled but a lot of kids really do have problems like my son he can not control his emotions, we have a way to calm are self down when we are happy or angry or even sad, some kids are not born with this in them and has to be taught. Its sad but true!! so instead of telling people that hitting a child is the only way to control them try and learn more about the problem before you give advice

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Good grief WHO is the ADULT?? Time to put on your big girl panties !! Rule 1 of parenting is you are NOT your kids "Friend" they have enough of those. I used to tell my sons (3 of them) "Do you want to take a trip to the restroom?" That is ALL I had to do and they sat still and shut up. The oldest one tried throwing a tantrum in a department store when he was 3 or 4 and I stepped over him and said "When your done I will be over there" and walked away. Well he didn't know what to think. I never took my eyes off him, but he didn't know that. He figured out real quick he wasn't getting his own way. Try reading Dr Dobson's "Dare To Discipline" or "Bending The Will Without Breaking The Spirit" and for heavens sake spank his butt! I raised 3 sons and could take them anywhere and believe you me they knew if they acted up they were getting the board of education to the seat of knowledge. They are all find young men now! And yes I hate eating out due to other idiot parents who won't make their kids mind! STAY HOME!

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Advicemama never gives realistic advice. First she says, during a tantrum, never explain why he can't have it.....then she says, explain to him that he can't have the cookies because they will spoil his dinner. I say give him one cookie and if he has a tantrum, put him in his room. If my kids ever had a tantrum in a public place, they would get a warning. If they didn't stop after a minute, I would pick them up and take them out of there. It didn't matter if we were at a birthday party or in a store. They quickly learned.

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I have found the best thing in this situation is to let the kid have the tantrum-just make sure there is nothing near them that they can hurt themselves with.

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Good Lord!!! What is WRONG with you arm chair psychiatrists? The brat needed his butt whipped. I don't mean you should EVER beat your kid, but a sound spanking has stopped MANY a tantrum. Give them a reason to holler and yell. Parents today are scared to death of their kids and the kids know it. Both of my kids were spanked when they needed it and today both are NORMAL adults who also spank their own kids when they need it. My son and daughter are both professional people, well adjusted, financially secure and neither of them show any signs of mental illness because I spanked them.. The good Lord put a soft little padding on their behinds so a spanking wouldn't hurt them but sure as hell made them notice you meant businessLOL.. you people who try to psych out your kids are idiots!

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bgs - I agree 100%. I never had a problem with mine after both did the crying and on the floor thing. I said, Ok, just go ahead and get it over with. Because next time. Mom WILL GET a babysitter. Didin't bekieve me, till I did. Well guess what, never happened again. All I had to say was do I need to get the babysitter? And all was fine. And a good slap on the bottm wouldn't hurt them either.

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Look at kids today vs kids 30 years ago and than consider what has changed. Kids have no fear (in a reasonable sense) of their parents (or anyone else) and therefore no respect. Kids need discipline and guidelines. They need to know who's boss and what is acceptable / unacceptable. Once in a while they need a swat on the butt too. We have always travelled alot and gone many places and our 3 kids never acted up or embarassed because they knew better. And I don't think any of them got spanked after they were 2 years old. But that requires more than dropping them off at daycare and than sticking them in front of a tv when you get them home. Anyone can make babies... takes a little effort to be a parent!

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When my son (at the time maybe 2-3) would throw a tantrum in a public place, I simply sat down next to him at the mall and waited for him to be done. Once he realized I wasn't giving in, he wasn't embarassing me etc he stopped after about 20seconds. To this day he has never done it again.

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Spank His Butt!

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I have 3 children, and the middle one was the one who always threw temper tantrums. If we were out and she started throwing a tantrum, my husband or I would just pick her up and take her back to the car. At home, I put her in her room. There was no talking to her during these tantrums. I tried all the things they said to try, such as explaining why she couldn't have something or talking to her in a very quiet voice which was supposed to make her stop to listen to me. Well, nothing ever worked but separating her from the situation. After she calmed down, we could talk about it, and when she was around 4 or 5, she would even know that she was wrong to have the tantrum. Now at 12, she just removes herself from the situation that she knows is going to cause her to want to throw a fit, until she calms down and feels she can discuss it rationally. I believe she learned that she doesn't always get what she wants, but also how to realize that when something upsets her, it's best to think about your actions first, then discuss when you're ready.

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It is time that parents start getting the little bastards attention again. The liberal child raising system has this whole country screwed up.

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