The Hatch-Palucks, Week 15: The Elephant In the Room

If you have NEVER lived throught this you should keep your nasty comments to yourself! You have no idea what it is like to see your child not want to eat, in my case it is my 4 year old son. Ihave a 6 year old daughter who will eat anything so please dont tell me that I am a bad parent. We have tried everything and have been to several doctors also. We hope that one day it will click and he will eat like any other child does, but until that time comes it is my responsibly to make sure he eats what he likes and keep on trying. So to all of you that have the same problem as I do with my son please keep trying and dont let these people who have no idea about this put us down!!!!!

Very uninformed comment. I had similiar problems as a small child and was treated much as lisa suggests - a timer when I ate, sent to bed early with out a full meal since I wouldn't eat all foods, other threats and punishments. I was extremely thin from refusing to eat enough. It was a constant struggle. My parents were depression-era kids, so I don't blame them for how they choose to handle the situation, but all this did not help. Many years later at age 50 I have eating disorder issues (I guess I'll never be fat). For me, every time I eat a meal with other people where I consume most of what's put in front of me I feel like I've really accomplished something!

@Karen, actually the article does say the mother indulged her in the beginning . I do feel bad for you and your daughter, but I think maybe you allowed this to happen. Don't let Dr's put a label on her and make you think this is more then it is. You are setting your child up for using a crutch for the rest of her life.

Are you KIDDING me lady?? Have you EVER walked in the shoes of a parent struggling to get a child with this problem eat year after year?? Well, I AM one of those parents! Indulge and give into the kid??? FAR FROM IT! I have 3 kids and 2 of them eat healthy and just about anything in sight ... the 3rd child? She wouldn't even breastfeed when she was born and the nurses struggled for an entire day in the nursery just to get her to drink water from a bottle! She is 19 years old now and still will only eat a few types of food and stays sick throughout the year from the lack of nutrients due to this weird phobia! You have ABSOLUTELY NO IDEA what you are giving an opinion on!! How incredibly ignorant of you to make such an evaluation of something you have never experienced firsthand! You owe this lady an apology ... and the rest of us too that have had to deal with this for years.

"Don't let Dr's put a label on her and make you think this is more then it is. You are setting your child up for using a crutch for the rest of her life."


Sounds more to me like you're a self-important sollipist whose talking well outside the boundaries of their limited knowledge.

To LisaT and sd1904, shame on you! This is more than pickiness, I have a son who has a food aversion, it's been diagnosed by both doctors and therapists. I listened to some doctors, and ignorant people like you, until my 18 month old son had to undergo a blood transfusion for lack of iron, because he would only eat a few things. If you snuck foods into his mouth, he would spit it out or throw it up, even at one year old. I treated my daughter the same way as my son when it came to food, and she eats everything. My son is 3 now, and it's still a constant battle. It actually stresses him out to eat, and asking nicely, giving praise, an reprimanding do not work in persuading him to eat. I didn't cause his food aversion, and I'm not going to force food down his throat and cause emotional damage. All I can do is keep trying, and hope he will eventually grow out of this. I am just thankful that he is slowly trying more foods. I am suprised at how many others have children who have the same problem, and I wish you all the best in trying to get them to eat new things. I know it is not easy.

Stop buying her junkfood. Provide healthy things. Her tastes will change when she is hungry enough. What about children in other poor countries that have limited options? You are creating a monster.

Some of these comments are just sick and from very uneducated people! My son is 3 with a food phobia as well. Im an educated women who is a strict mother and doesnt give into manipulation, however this behavior is not manipulation. My son pukes when something new goes into his mouth. He has been picky since he started eating and we never gave in. We tried giving him the same food over and over, he just didnt eat. He eats no junk! so he is not filling up on that. He has a serious issue just like other kids out there. How dare uneducated people make comment like "bring him to my house and he will eat" or send him to another country. Stupid. If sending my kid to another country would get him to eat I would already be there.

@ Lisa...children in the autistic spectrum are not a good example of children who refuses to eat. Asperger , PDD and other autistic spec causes sensory issues that has nothing to do with what this woman is saying about her daughter This little girl sounds like a spoil child who is use to having it her way.

You may not have read the article, but the child is AFRAID to try new foods. She doesn't refuse to try new foods, but she's scared. She is truly and seriously scared to try new food. It's not a power struggle. Phobias are real, ma'am, and not to be rude, but you obviously don't know what you're talking about.

My son ate "normal" until about a year old then had such severe reactions to new foods that he threw up. He was later diagnosed with a form of Autism called Asperger's. Colors, textures, tastes would send him over the edge. You cannot starve this away or discipline this away. I was judged also. I was told to spank him more, if he gets hungry enough he will eat, yadda yadda yadda. I tried to educate him to dietary requirements (he has a 126 I.Q.) but that didn't work either. He is now 23 and will eat ham, pork, and beef but don't dare show him any poultry. Still no vegetables. Maybe one day.....

Amen Donna! If there is no pathology, then the kid is a brat and Mom is the enabler. Further, if a 6 y/o has "panic attacks" over food, then she's got a much bigger problem than just food aversion. Emulating Mom, maybe?

You have no idea what you are talking about!! There is a real condition. Just because you are not familiar with it, don't show your ignorance.

Kids affected by this want to eat. They would LOVE to eat a cookie or icecream without projectile vomitting or feel like they are going to die.

Donna,

You sound like a very harsh woman. It is very difficult to watch a child suffer even if you feel it is over something very minor. It would be like you not being able to swim, but you can doggy paddle and someone throwing you into the deep end. While I understand we need to get our children through it, we need to have a little more compassion than you afford them.

Thanks

I would hate to be your child!!!! nasty nasty nasty person you are. Ther are the only words I can say to explain you!!!!!!

Wow, I think you all need to volunteer at your local developmental disability center. That in "you", I mean everyone who is an extremist in either direction. People can be over zealous, which is not healthy for these situations. People need to get real and stick to facts, not negitivity towards others. If you haven't experienced something yourself, then have your opinions in silence or in respectiable manors. I have no respect for those who feel opinions are "bashing" someone else. If you spell a word wrong on these blogs then people jump all over you, really? NO_ONE IS PERFECT!! Help each other succeed. It takes a strong person to hurt, but a stronger person to help!

Donna- are you a real person or a robot? I can't imagine any woman wanting to write such judgmental, nasty, scathing comments to a stranger.It is a pity that there is such nastiness in your remarks. What are you like as a friend or neighbor? Would you be swatting kids around who didn't do everything you demanded? The kid obviously has problems beyond food taste, and so does her mother. They deserve compassion and sympathy, not vitriol.

But she said the chld didn't eat for three days. An aversion is different from being picky.

Yes, the answer to any childhood problem is abuse. And, by the comments you make, you are definitely an abusive person.