Six-Year-Old Daughter Overcome With Anxiety When Faced With Anything New

Just want to help I think your daughter Is scared.
your daughter needs to think of other things let her take a doll to school it will give her a baby to hold and to love and it will help this way she can get over the thing that makes her scared I'm a scout deal with kids all the time. the trick is she need some one in school so the doll will help what she need is a friend in school.

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From the kindergarten to 2nd grade period, EVERY morning during the school year, I would be tense and often have a stomach ache (I stopped drinking milk only in the morning, which helped greatly, and learned to eat a small breakfast). I often cried before going to school, in the school yard, and sometimes at the beginning of class (I tried to hold it in, but it didn't work). A number of kids I played with in my neighborhood were in my class, so it wasn't that I didn't know anyone or feel uncomfortable with them. I did not have these symptoms on weekends or in the summer (even though my parents were pretty strict), only during school. My parents would ask me why I was crying but I didn't know! With 40+ years of hindsight now, I think the reasons had to do with: my general shyness and unease of not knowing what would be happening that day in school - I especially never liked being put on the spot being called on in class (so advanced warning about things would've been good); I went to a VERY strict Catholic school which caused great stress (my symptoms decreased greatly when we moved and I went to a public school); and I was (and still am to a lesser extent now) a perfectionist, was hard on myself, and took school extremely seriously. It also didn't help that often my elementary teachers would choose me as the class "monitor" where I had to report those who had misbehaved/talked when they weren't supposed to, etc.

The crying stopped by 4th grade, but every first day of school of my life, I always had to throw up before leaving the house, even if I knew my teacher and who would be in my class. So, it was no surprise to me that I also had to throw up before I put on my wedding gown to get married (I did brush my teeth afterward!). Now as an adult, althought I have worked in many stressful jobs, once in a while I still will wake up with an upset stomach before a big meeting/important presentation/big project and know that I have to throw up. After that, I can eat breakfast and get on with my day. I just learned recently that my nephew inherited my gene for throwing up on the first day of school too through graduate school (he was Homecoming King in high school).

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I have a child who was extremely shy and would have terrible anxiety about anything new. Over the past 4 years things have changed in leaps and bounds.

When he started Kindergarten, I explained to the teacher his anxiety issues. She was kind and sensitive towards his anxiety. Every year I'd write a letter to the Principal explaining my child's needs for a teacher that understood sensitive and anxiety ridden children and every year the school would place my son with the most wonderful, kind, loving teachers. Between Kindergarten and 4th grade we have seen such positive changes in his behavior. With the help of his teachers and our own sensitivity towards our child, he feels safer and less anxious these days. Of course, the anxiety pops up with new situations. But now he'll talk with us about it instead of outright panic attacks.

Be patient with your child. Acknowledge your child's concerns. Remind your child of all the positive outcomes from unknown situations. Teach your child to take deep breaths. Hold your child's hand. Don't be afraid to get your child's teachers and Principal involved. Don't let anyone tell you that you are spoiling your child. Anxiety is very real. With time and patience, and the right environment and tools, you can help your child to overcome this issue. It won't happen overnight, but it will happen. Good luck!

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I experienced anxiety as a child and teen and pretty much overcame it. I too had motion sickness! I never knew there was a correlation! (I also had allergies and asthma but outgrew those). I think in some ways, for some people, it is a 'thinking' disease. Your thoughts grow and become bigger thoughts and you just panic. Then you panic about panicing. It's very very frightening. I actually was a performer, on stage, and quit because of terrible stage fright and my life was a living hell, always dreading and worrying about it. I cannot imagine anything worse.
I have no idea what causes it, possibly genetic.
I do not think drugs are good, unless it's severe and you're older. Each case is different. Ironically, in college I begged for help and received none, no drugs, no good advice from therapists, I was completely on my own and did some of my own research. Nathaniel Brandon who pioneered the idea of self-esteem said that anxiety and panic attacks are a deep internal conflict between what is and what you feel ought to be. Something you feel you can't reconcile. For example: fight or flight.
I think with the girl in the article, depending on how severe it is, the mom might want to try just ignoring it. The more you focus on anxiety and the family talks about it and doctors etc. - the worse it can get. On the other hand, if it's "real" and continues... calmness and logic might help. I do think sometimes children can understand logic. And preperation may help but then that also becomes a "thing." It's very important that the girl knows that it's not forever, it's just a phase, sounds like a very good conscientious mom.

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Meds are not always the answer. Learning how to teach her a new way to interpret her feelings and react in order to put the anxiety and fears behind her is not exactly easy but can be done.
www.childwithanxiety.com

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I am SO with the writer. The real trick is to make it seem like no big deal. The more you try to rationalize or explain it, the worse it will become. Pre-visits (without going into detail to the child) are an AWESOME idea, to let the child see that there is no big harm or fuss in what is about to go on.

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what ever you parents have to do is fine , just make your little naZty ass brats shut the hell up already , will yaZ !

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A spiritual viewpoint is thus: If you believe in good and bad sprits (like who or what drove hitler to be so bad) then you must believe that alot of the time with kids and adults there is a spritual battle going on all the time. Prayer works to soothe. Many times even the father or mother or other close relatives actually are carrying a bad spirit around with them and it piggybacks onto other people they meet (hence sometimes you are having a great day and one person either on the phone or in person seems to cause you a headache and now your day is ruined?) . Keeping all family members closely in tune with the gospel will help alot. One lady I know has a horrible ex boyfriend who is the father of her little girl, every time he is around the child starts acting very irratic and rebellious, resentful, angry. She started send the child to a christian school run by nuns and she states that the child is much better although still reacting badly to the ex who unfortunately has visitation rights ( also she says he goes to porn shops and so forth

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I Know how you and your child feels. It's just as upsetting for them as it is for you. I lived through the same thing for years with my son. Kindergarten and third grade where the worst. I would pick him up from school often because of the upset stomach and throwing up. I talked to doctors and there best advice was to be there for him. Listen to the fears, but choose your words wisley when your talking. Some things you say can make them more nervous.Now my son is 14 and all is well. I can't say he never gets nervous about things because he does. But so does everyone. I hope all goes well for you !!!

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I really didn't like the use of the word, "cower" as in "cower in the shadows." Having anxiety doesn't make you a coward.

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A few of my kids deal with this, to varying degrees. As indicated, the key is in the prep work. Repeatedly talk about what is going way ahead of time of the event or activity so by the time the day arrives, your child feels like it is just part of the routine. Talk about what will happen before the event, and then what will happen afterward. Keep it all calm and simple.

As the kids get older and their reasoning increases they may get quite creative about all the things that can go wrong on that first day of school, etc. In this situation we discuss the worst things that can happen. Maybe you can't find your class, what will you do? Etc. With a plan to address the worst possible things, your child will feel prepared, and calmer.

We also to do the breathing. My teens make fun of me for telling them to breathe, but they do it, and they feel better.

Good luck!

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My son started each morning with exercise. Age 3 he used a indoor trampoline and moved to a exercise bike. He is 25 and runs 8 miles each day.
Exercise each morning would stop anxiety from being part of their morning hours.

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