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Most Americans Believe Single Motherhood Is Bad for Society, Survey Finds
Filed under: In The News, Single Parenting
Single mom? You're being judged. Credit: Corbis
Although there is a growing acceptance or tolerance of same-sex and unmarried couples raising children, most Americans still believe single motherhood is outright "bad for society," according to results of a survey released this week by the Pew Research Center's Social and Demographic Trends.
But despite the attitude toward single parents, census statistics show nuclear families today account for barely one in five U.S. households, while the National Center for Health Statistics reports nearly four in 10 births are to unmarried women, the Washington Post reports.
"People aren't embracing these changes, but they are accepting them," Rich Morin, a senior editor at the Pew Center and author of the report, tells the Post. "The days when people were made to wear a scarlet letter or were shunned after a divorce are ancient history."
The survey asked a nationally representative sample of 2,691 adults whether they considered the following seven trends in modern family structure to be good, bad or of no consequence to society:
- More unmarried couples raising children
- More gay and lesbian couples raising children
- More single women having children without a male partner to help raise them
- More people living together without marrying
- More mothers of young children working outside the home
- More people of different races marrying each other
- More women never having children
The most striking difference between the three groups occurs in their reported attitudes toward single motherhood. Virtually all of the skeptics (99 percent) say the trend is bad for society, while nearly 90 percent of accepters say the increase in single women having children has made no difference or is a good thing for society, according to the survey.
The difference between skeptics and accepters on their views of single motherhood is so great that the two groups would merge into one if that question were removed from the survey, the authors report.
Overall, the three groups of respondents are split as follows:
- One-half to two-thirds of the accepters say the seven trends make no difference to society; but, of the remainder, more say most of the trends are good, rather than bad. This group is most likely to include women, Hispanics, East Coast residents and adults who seldom or never attend religious services.
- The rejecters, a similarly-sized group, reject nearly every trend the accepters tolerate or approve of. A majority say five out of the seven changes are bad for society, accepting only interracial marriage and few women having children. They are also the only group in which a majority says it's harmful for mothers of young children to work outside the home. This group is overwhelmingly comprised of whites, older adults, Republicans, the religiously observant and married adults.
- The skeptics, a somewhat larger group, share most of the tolerant views of the accepters, but also express concern about how these trends impact society. However, nearly all of these respondents say single motherhood is bad for society -- vs. only 2 percent of accepters who feel this way. However, most say the six other trends make no difference or are good for society. This group is mostly comprised of young people, Democrats and political independents and minorities.
"Working mothers are acceptable to almost everybody," Cherlin says. "Two parents who are unmarried are tolerated or acceptable. But many people, including single parents themselves, question single-parent families. There's still a strong belief that children need two parents."
But Cherlin suggests that, for many Americans, this opinion is rooted in practical, not moral, concerns.
"They're concerned about the economic problems of single mothers, and the amount of effort it takes to be a good parent. People aren't anti-single mother as much as they are pro-two parents," he concludes.











ReaderComments (Page 5 of 10)
2-17-2011 @ 5:22PM
lou said...maybe we can finally stop supporting all those "baby mama's" and get the fathers to do it instead
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2-17-2011 @ 5:24PM
Reginald Valentine said...My father and my aunt reared six younger siblings in the Jim Crow south after their parents died in an auto accident dthe 1940s. I reared six children in a small southern town where Jim Crow is alive an in robust good health in 2011. It's not about gender or race it's about people who bring children into the world and are unwilling or unable to fulfill the sacred trust of parenthood.
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2-17-2011 @ 5:26PM
Leila said...I can't tell you how many two parent families I know, both married and unmarried, that lack stability, love and support among family members. It's not fair to label single mothers in a negative way. Also, many times there are two parents in the home, but one or both are pretty much absent (physically or emotionally). You have to look at the whole picture.
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2-17-2011 @ 5:31PM
LadyCoco said...in my opinion, that majority they refer to are Tea Party members or other right-wing conservatives who want to legislate how we live, what we do to our bodies, and other such nonsence. Leave me and my body alone!!!!
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2-17-2011 @ 5:37PM
LadyCoco said...In an ideal world that would be the best way. But in this REAL world, it is much better for a child to be raised by one parent than two if one of them is an abuser, alcoholic, a felon, etc. I raised my son by myself. I worked, paid our own way, and was never was on welfare. He is now a responsible adult with children of his own.
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2-17-2011 @ 5:38PM
cher said...I am a single mother and I have the greatest kids. They are really smart and do well in school. They are well behaved and I have not had a single bad moment with them. Did I want to be a single mother, no. My ex cheated on me and I just didn't want to stay in a marriage where he didn't care about me or the kids. So don't blame all single moms. Give us a break.
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2-17-2011 @ 6:01PM
LS said...This is such a complicated issue. Judging doesn't help. It's about the children and the health of the parent who is raising them. That is one of the reasons I started www.singleparentsavings.wordpress.com. We might not have set out to be single parents, but if we are we need support and solutions and not blame and judgement.
Lisa
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2-17-2011 @ 6:03PM
David S. said...What a hoot people are.....they judge and condemn single parenthood, gays, living together before marriage, etc. Yet no doubt they have plenty of these folks in their own families or did them also...same old hypocrisy.
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2-17-2011 @ 6:05PM
pdq said...I'll tell you what is worse than being raised by a single mother and that is being raised (dragged up) by a widowed father. Women in general are more nurturing and understanding than men, so my brothers and I missed out on a lot. I was 8 when my mom died. Dad worked full time and had a long commute to NYC from Jersey, so time was limited. He did the best he could, but we siblings acknowledge today that we had a difficult time of it. Yay, women, but kids do best with two loving heterosexual parents, no doubt about it!
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2-17-2011 @ 6:12PM
UPS91 said...I became a single mom, when the ex decided to come out of the closet and left us. I can tell you that I have never felt more liberated. I am seeking a Masters degree, that will allow me to eventually work overseas. My kids are doing great. They are both honor students and love the fact that Mom is achieving a higher degree. I am responsible for their well being and mine. We are all more happy and enjoying a great time. They know my goal to go overseas and are rooting for me to get there.
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2-17-2011 @ 6:13PM
K Lee said...As a Single mom, I know it was better for my children to be with me than with their abusive father, but I only wish there were more male role models out there. We live in a military town and being single makes you a Leper. My child is honor roll, but left out of gatherings by "friends' because we don't have the military Dad. Church is the same way. I must be a man hungry woman because I'm single and surviving on my own.
I'm not complaining, but I do wish things were different for my child. I wish she didn't have to lose out on friendships because of my decisions (of picking the loser or leaving the loser.)
It's not about right or wrong - children want a united family - no matter what that is.
One parent may be capable, but it's not optimal.
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2-17-2011 @ 6:15PM
LYNNEB119 said...There is a negative connotation in this article toward single moms. Single moms have to work harder and do double duty to raise their children. The problem is that there are all "boys" in society and no "men" nowadays. They go to work, head for the bar, look for some excitement on the side, because once you have a child you aren't seen as exciting, you are seen as the mom. There are few men who work, come home and have dinner with the family, participate in helping with homework, baths, time with the kids. They are missing a sense of responsibility, providing for the family, setting a good example for the kids, virtues. They are too busy out playing. Women have to be strong and do it all. The boys don't bring anything to the table anymore, who needs them! Combine that with fertility clinics, men will make themselves obsolete.
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2-17-2011 @ 7:47PM
Lc said...You have got to be kidding me. My father died when I was twelve years old and for the last five years of my life, my mother has been raising me (and two older siblings) on HER own. It's devastating. But she's a FANTASTIC mother. I cannot begin to express my gratefulness towards her and how proud I am for her having her as a mother. Do you know what it's like seeing your mother struggle and cry, because she wants the best for you but can't manage it due to life's hardships. If you don't, then lucky you, and be quiet. There's been times where we could barely pay bills or lived check by check. I don't regret sacrificing a social life that most teens have of going to school dances or movies weekly, because we CANT afford it. But I don't cry or complain, because MY SINGLE MOTHER is doing the best she can. And guess what? I have a 3.96 GPA, an internship at a college (in my junior year of high school), and two older siblings attending college by scholarship and working their own butts off. So please. Spare me and my family by these insults of single mothers being bad mothers. My mother didn't expect my father to die and I know for a fact that she'd happily have him back in an instant, because this life has NOT been easy without him.
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2-17-2011 @ 6:27PM
enlightened77 said...It's times like this where I wonder what kind of society would look down on any parent who tries to make things work for their kid. I am raising my son alone, something I had not intended on doing but realized my husband was no more interested in being a father then he would be having a fungus on his skin. I could have forced the issue with us arguing and hating each other and having my child raised in a hostile environment or do what I did which was get him out and show him all the love and care I possibly can. He is a bright well rounded boy and I am sure that it would have been nice for him to have a father but the one he was provided with did not want the responsibility. I cant say im doing a wonderful job right now he is still quite young all I can do is hope that I am raising someone who wishes to contribute positively to this world. Its all any good parent(s) would want and it doesnt always take two to achieve.
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2-17-2011 @ 6:33PM
michael said...most of em are nothing but leeches who look for a man to sponge off of
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2-17-2011 @ 6:46PM
mary said...Having been a single mother, and raising my son on my own for the first years of his life. I find your article to be not only closed minded and insulting !!! As another person had commented, single mothers rarely CHOOSE to be in this position. Would it suit america if I were to have stayed in an abusive relationship with a thief, mentally abusive , untrustworthy , convicted felon? Just so to appear to be in a "perfect" two parent family. Lets think a little deeper here people. How about putting some of the billions of dollars handed out to military spending then perhaps the single parents out there could feed there children, live in comfortable homes and have health care and then there might be support for the future of society in this country. Just a thought.
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2-17-2011 @ 6:49PM
JonR said...1 in 5 households where the parents live together and raise their children....sickening! Divorce is rooted in the loss of moral values that America displays today.
Family law in this country is a joke. Women know the system favors them and will remove the father from a family, leaving only his wallet behind. Everywhere you look today you see people lost in themselves. We live in a society where what feels right to you is okay to do; to hell with those who are hurt by your actions.
It's not OK to be a single mother, it is not OK to be an unwed mother, it's not OK to remove a father from their child's life because someone or something better came along. It is not OK for you and your attorney to lie in family court so you can get primary custody {and the support that comes with it}. It is not OK for a father to be involved every other weekend in a child's life.
I am sickened by the selfishness and greed of women today.
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2-17-2011 @ 7:40PM
Michelle said...You clearly have had a bad experience, but not all single moms are that way. I divorced my ex husband, because he was an abusive, drug addict, who couldn't keep it in his pants around other women... According to your statement I should have stayed with him? I should have allowed him to see our son when he was doing drugs in his presence? No nothing better came along for me, and that isn't why I left him. I don't waste my time dating, and I haven't for 5 yrs since my divorce, why because I would rather spend time with my son.... His father? He sees him 2 times a yr for his birthday and for christmas. The rest of the time he could care less about his son, and he doesn't even bother to call him. So please be aware not all women are evil. I am doing what is best for my son, I watched my ex beat his older children black and blue and there was nothing I could do, because I was already on the floor in pain for protecting them. So don't stereotype all women, because you had a bad experience. I don't stereotype all men as dead beat, drug addict, abusers, and you shouldn't generalize women that way.
2-17-2011 @ 6:50PM
csmith2720 said...Personally I do not have issues with single parents as long as you
can support your children and not depend on the government, via
my tax dollars to do so. I am so sick of the single Mom syndrome
as if it is badge of honor "I am a single Mom". Chances are very
good that this is because of your behavior or your issues.
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2-17-2011 @ 6:56PM
Darlene said...Thank God for single mothers! How many women have to step up to the plate when the deadbeat Dads just up and leave for the younger woman or just because he wants more freedom to "find himself"? I was a thin, clean, attractive, intelligent female that had to work two jobs at times as the children got older...AND NO CHILD SUPPORT from Dad. I never took a dime of charity of any kind. This was before the support laws were beefed up. My kids turned out great, good jobs and also have always been self supporting tax payers. I didn't ask to be a single mother...but I didn't do so bad, did I?
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