SmackDown: Would You Publicly Punish Your Child?

so emotional abuse is okay with you as long as they "aren't injured." hmm. i guess sexual abuse is okay too then. jesus lady, get a clue. if you can't figure out how to properly and effectively parent then don't have children. and btw....it doesn't even sound like you are a good step-praent if you don't know your boundaries. you aren't your step-son's mother. let his parents handle talking to his teachers. jeesh.

I feel as though dense people like you just want to feel like a hard ass for pretending that this buffoon should be 'commended'. The real issue here, is did this 'mother' attempt any other options before this ghetto move? I don't know, such as, actively taking part in her students' academics? But most likely, this hasn't occurred, and probably never occurred in her own childhood. Nothing but malicious behavior that results in crap members of society with the emotional intelligence of a reptile. Good for you to be in favor of that.

I love when people feel the need to personally attack others for their opinions. God forbid someone disagree with your ways...... lets jump all over them for it!

How do you know she lit a fire under her child? Do you know if this action actually helped to improve his grades? I would have to say it didn't!!! If anything, it just angered the child. No child WANTS to do poorly in school. This is not the way to handle it!!
Also, not all injuries are SKIN DEEP. If they were, then we wouldn't need therapists in this society. You truly can HURT a child without drawing blood. I've seen it too often.
Think twice people and stop acting from your anger...

I don't think this is anything but grandstanding for the parent. Otherwise it wouldn't be on the internet. Looking for a book deal I assume. The kids are going to be as smart as the parent. Keep on and in a few more years your kid will have you out on the street with a sign. Take care of your problems at home. The whole world doesn't need to know about them.

Oh... and I never said anything about sexual abuse.. why go there? This is not emotional abuse... its called learning the consequences for your actions. If he keeps failing out of school, he'll be just another bum on the corner with sign asking for money. At least maybe this sign will wake him up.
As far as my own parenting... I co-parent with my husband and the worthless birthmom abandoned the kid.. not that it is relevant to the topic at hand or your business.

Let me start by writing that I am not a parent, but I am an aunt who cares deeply about the education of my nieces and nephews (just like a mother).

Sometimes when one speaks to multiple “professionals” involved in the education of a child and nothing works, one should considered other childhood issues that might hamper a child’s learning such as learning issues (dyslexia, etc), physical issues (vision problems, etc), psychiatric issues (schizophrenia, conduct behavior problems, etc), social problems(loneliness, loss of a loved one, etc) and yes, even abuse(physical, emotional, etc).

These days, it is difficult to raise children “appropriately” when one has to work to provide food and shelter for the family. And certainly a child who in the justice system is good for no one either!
But let us consider the discipline of a child who steals versus a child who performs poorly in school. One is breaking the law and the other is not; therefore, the punishment should not be the same for both.

I do agree that national recognition of this child’s situation is making the matter worse, and could actually have a more negative impact on him than a positive one (only time will tell).
But it seems that this parent is asking for help in a nonconventional way…and that too should be addressed. This entire family need psychosocial help to address these issues!

I dont see anything wrong with what she did. Who are we to sit and say that she didnt try any other methods, we werent there so lets not start speculating. Also what make the fact that she made her kid stand on the coner GHETTO? Let me be the first to tell you there in nothing ghetto about that. I have served in the Army about 6 years, and I have seen thing like this happen numerous times. So is it ghetto if the military does it or is it ghetto because she is black? No only would it make her son want to do better, but if another teen saw it they would probably do everything within there power to not be that 15 yr old boy.

CENDERS..... Are you for real? I mean, really, are you for real? A good example of "they walk amongst us!"

You truly do not see the problem with this type of punishment?! Shame and humiliation are types of abuse, like it or not, and this type of punishment will only do more harm to this child than good; I know, because I came from an extremely verbally (And physically) abusive household, and no amount of this type of humiliation in the world will effect any real positive change; quite the contrary, it will reinforce feelings of worthlessness, self-loathing, and ultimately, it will quite possibly cause the child to give up entirely. We wouldn't allow the courts to get away with this, and we shouldn't allow this mother to do so, either.

You know, I've met many people over the course of my lifetime who have told me that they, too, were prepared for life in much the same way this mother is preparing her child for a tough life; unfortunately, most of those people are now DOING life. Abuse will only beget further abuse, and that further abuse will continue to spawn generations to come who have no self-esteem or self-worth, so they'll become teenage parents and eventually repeat the cycle of abuse and neglect that they themselves were subjected to, which in turn will continue to breed poverty, crime, and hopelessness instead of fully functioning and productive young adults. I personally made many, many mistakes in my life until I got help from a therapist and began to slowly undo the horrific emotional damage that was inflicted upon me as a childwho also had a bonafide learning disability. We can do better than this, folks, and we should, for the sake of future generations who are increasingly lost during the junior-high and high-school years.

I don't understand why everyone is commenting in such a personal way. I can understand both sides of the situation. No, I do not have kids, but if my mother did this to me, I would be angry but not embarrassed. What will be embarrassing for him is when he doesn't get a decent job or a higher education or even fails to complete high school due to his low GPA. He is embarrassing himself at school. The mother clearly stated she tried everything she could. I guess some of you didn't read that. Maybe she shouldn't have put his GPA on the board, but it is very evident that education is necessary. I feel as if the kids who aren't succeeding or are running"wild" are the ones with parents who are "afraid" to hurt their feelings. And Ghetto??? why did that term even have to be used? People are entitled to their own opinions. It is no sense in criticizing one another. We are entitled to feel however we want. That is why God gave us free will. I am not in anyway for abusing children. However, I am not for being lenient on children who fail to follow rules either.

Since I have seen so many individuals comment on why this is a negative way of handling the situation, what is the proper way to handle children who: choose not to do their homework, choose to skip class, choose not to learn, choose not to ask someone for help, choose to quit? My wife and I are constantly trying to fix/change our daughter into doing better at school and work ethic. Please tell me what the correct solution is so I can avoid this type of situation. I would like to have any and all available comments from you on how to fix this problem. I'm looking forward to your comments and suggestions.

Thanks

Hear hear.

I also think what this mom did is a great idea. Her kid needed to be punished, and so he has been. We need to stop molly coddling the entire population, and make people have a backbone again.

Actually, this DOES qualify as abuse. Punishment doesn't have to leave marks on the outside in order to be labeled abuse. There's such a thing as emotional abuse which is the INTENTIONAL humiliation and degradation of the dependent child. Unless you have knowledge of a psychological nature, you shouldn't comment on what is abuse and what isn't because the definitions aren't as black and white as they used to be. Like the one article says, maybe this mother should actually sit down with her son and try to help him with his homework. Or maybe she should sign up for a program that has free tutors. The article says she did everything that she could to help him. What, exactly, does 'everything' entail here?
Also, to your reference of the kid who stole from Kmart--as far as I know, getting F's in high school isn't a felony. The two cases are quite different.

Its the beeping the horn - its called noise pollution.

When my kids were little and grades started failing, I just took away every single thing I could think of short of a couple changes of clothes and their bed. They couldnt have anything back until I received a report from teachers that grades were improving. If you stop trying to be a friend to your child and be the parent, you would find out that situations will improve. You can't sit back and think..gee if I do that, my child wont love me! TOO BAD...Your job is to raise a productive adult and if you love your child you will do what is in THEIR best interest...not YOURS!

I think that is exactly what this article is saying.
Everyone~ mind your own business and let this woman handle her child the way she feel fit. This is not abuse and she didn't ask to have her business put on the news.

The problem is, that while some people see this as being wronged, others stand by the act, and why? because parents should see fit on how to raise their own children. Our children today think parents owe them....what? schools teach it,,,,,society teaches it.....and the t.v teaches it. .... I don't owe my kids anything other then to teach them to respect themselves....I applaude this woman,,,,now maybe she won't have to hear about the "other kids" and this kid will learn......

To begin with, none of us who are commenting here put this story in the national spotlight.

Also, stealing from K-Mart is vastly different from getting poor grades. On one hand you have a public offense, and on the other you have a family matter. Again, who's to say what the mother has done to this point to actually help her son? Just because you may have played an active role, doesn't mean that she has. And this is not parenting.

If we don't know ALL the facts then why is everyone jumping down the other posters? I tend to think if the mother went to this way of "teaching" than she probably went to the teachers, social workers, tried what she could with her child and NOTHING WORKED. I have a nephew who I love so much and he just won't do his homework. He only writes half his name on the paper +the teacher knows it me" writes as bog as he can so only 4 words fit on the page, whines till his mother gives up and he knows all the buttons to push. Would I do it different? Yep .. take away th "toys". Take him out of Scouts, give him bed time that works and not when "he decides to go to sleep". She makes threats but they are the one that no mother would follow through. "I'll throw you off the deck if you don't do ......" Threatened him that his Uncle and I would not let him come stay next year because of ...... name it she puts it in there. He was 8 at that time. His older brother also didn't do his homework. He thought it was "cute" to find ways to not do what he should do and read books he shouldn't during school. Where is the older one right now? Repeating the 9th grade. What did their mother do? Put them in a diffrent class where they go once a week for an hour. They get a packet to fill out and return the next week. No interaction with other students, no teachers and look how smart that was .... he flunked. The younger one is now in the same program because school became "too hard". IF this mother did everything she could .. went to the school, got help for this child, sat down with this child and did everything she could and more than what do you do next? Yep maybe a sign would help. Maybe he needs to stand on that corner and maybe he'll understand this is not a laughing game. He's not abuse physically, ot sexually abused, emotionally? Who knows. What may work for one parent/child doesn't mean it will work for the other. If this mother did everything she could and this child still wouldn't study then what's next? Throw your hands up in the air and walk away? There's NO PROOF she didn't try everything. And yes, there's proof she didn't. But I'm looking at the yes she tried. You can't be a parent and a best friend. It does not work. You are given this child to parent you are not given this child to be their best friend. That happens once they grow up.