Opinion: What's Up With All These Out-of-Control, Bullying Parents?

Kids learn violence and bad behavior watching violence and gore on TV or playing it in video games. Maybe parents (even unknowingly) are picking up more aggressive attitudes from the things they enjoy as entertainment (which in turn lead to the bullying we are seeing). Kids act up and parents re-act. Keep it family friendly, safe and fun at your house - Http://bit.lY/smartersavings

First of all, "hot sauce mom" is not a bullying parent. She put a little bit of hot sauce in her son's mouth (despite what the media has you believe, she did not pour a bottle of hot sauce in his throat. She only put a little bit in his mouth) which is something my mother did if I lied or said a bad word when I was little. It did not traumatize me AT ALL. God forbid we make our child take a cold shower! What's next? Is soap on a toothbrush also child abuse? She also sought help because he was always acting up for which she was unfairly punished. Second, the mother put her 15 year old son on the street corner with a sign because she could not get him to care about his grades no matter what. If his peers' opinions is what he cared about, then that parent should have every right to use that as punishment. A little humiliation for a child is NOT child abuse. This mother with the ebay picture just needs to chill out a bit because the children were not intentionally damaging the bathtub and she should have just confiscated the toys. This is also not child abuse. It's so sickening that our society thinks they have every right to tell a parent how to raise their child when they have no idea how the child acts and many of them have young, easy to handle children or none at all!!

Okay all you people who consider this child abuse. What does a parent do? Don't give me some vague answer about "finding another solution" - suggest one! The fact is, if you are a parent, it is hard to find a creative way to discipline a child without some yabbo calling it abuse. Time-outs - Abuse! Spankings? - Definitely abuse! Taking away toys? Abuse! So what do I, as a parent, do when my child disobeys, then looks me in the eye and says "what are you gonna do about it?" And believe me - I'm a room, mom, my husband and I spend tons of quality time with the kids, they have extra-curricular activities, and we usually try to use a reward system for good behavior rather than a punishment system for bad behavior. However - there are times when kids cross the line, over and over and dare you to do something. It's not just a parent's fault when a child is out of control. In a society that encourages children to disobey and sass adults, and promotes a rhetoric of no consequences and abdication of responsibility, then punishes parents for trying to instill morals and discipline, we will never have well behaved kids - they just keep getting worse. I thank my parents every day for the discipline they gave me - from whacks on the butt to month-long groundings. I am a better, more successful person because I learned about consequences and self discipline.

No, but I know someone who soaped a child's mouth when the child had braces. It took him at least an hour just to pick the soup out of his braces. That's child abuse.

The problem with parents that bully is that they think they have complete and total control over what their child does and how they should behave. I am a parent, and there have been many times I would have liked to put some soap on a tooth brush. (especially now that he is in his teens)..but our children learn by example. Do I want my child to think this is how people communicate with one another when they disagree? No. Sure there is a consequence when theY do something unacceptable...ground them for the weekend, take toys away, make them write an apology letter to anyone they have offended ....but most of all explain to them why they are being punished and work on a way together to make that behavior stop. Bullying is lazy parenting...it is a quick fix to temporarily stop bad behavior. Or it is just lame parenting and it is really the parents that need help. Parenting is a privledge in our country...if you abuse the privledge...your child can be taken away...if you don't like it...go to another country...us "good" parents are tired of bad parents. We don't think it's funny when you pour hot sauce down your kids throat, we don't want to hear 90 reasons why that was what you had to do to get your desired result. We see right through you for the abusive jerks you are and quite frankly the only reason we even speak to you is for your child's sake, not because we like you...IF YOU ARE OFFENDED BY MY POST...GO GET SOME PARENTING CLASSES

The "hot sauce mom" put about 1/2 ounce of hot sauce in a child's mouth and forced the child into an icy shower while the child screamed from the pain and cold.
Selling the toys or taking their savings to pay for the tuub is one thing. Taking pictures of the children crying and posting the picture nationally is another thing altogether. This parent is trying to publically humiliate the children--not punish them.
There is a difference in a timeout or restricting privileges or even permanently taking away toys because the toys aren't used appropriately and publically humiliating a child. Any person who advocates public humiliation and/or corporal punishment doesn't deserve children.

Kim, First you have to decide whether or not your kids are first priority, then get radical...HOMESCHOOL! Your children will not pick up as many "worldly" habits. YOU have control of who they are around and YOU will be their model of proper behavior (very convicting!). I taught in schools (public and private) and now homeschool. Many comment on the difference in their behavior. It's a LOT of work. If you don't love being around your children...this is NOT for you. We had to buy a house on ONE income. But again, if they are your priority over your lux. items ...including home, car, cell phone, cable, etc. ...you'll make the sacrifice! Not many are willing to admit that "things" and "bills" are their #1 priority and just say, "We can't afford.", but people are doing it in droves! and seeing the benefits! It is possible with sacrifice!

None of these incidents is child abuse. Child abuse is when you beat your child black and blue, when you lock them in a closet without food or water all day, etc. I'm not condoning what these parents have done to discipline their children but it is not child abuse but poor judgment. Labeling everything child abuse has approached the ridiculous. Popping a kid on the rear once for misbehaving is a lot different than hitting them with a broom handle. One of my sisters thought it was cute to use profanity. My dad washed her mouth out with soap and the rest of us kids went around singing "I'm forever blowing bubbles" if we heard her say a bad word. Was she humiliated? Yes. Did she stop cursing? Yes. Was she traumatized for life? No. These parents could certainly use a talking to but they don't belong in the child welfare system. When children's services departments have to waste their time investigating these types of parents, the real child abusers slip through the system and children who are really being abused die.

I raised 2 wonderful children and came from a family of 6 siblings. NEVER once did I have to do anything more than raise my voice to get my children to behave. It came out of respect which THEY were given. I was brought up the same way. You people who think this is ok sicken me. I would have someone do this to you the next time you do a behavior that they don't like. Come on we are not animals. Disapline starts from the time a child is small. Even dogs will react to just a sound of a voice. I do cried for this poor child when I saw this. I hope this woman first gets punished and then gets the mental help she needs.

Just bring spanking back...instate an "socially acceptable" way of it...it was a much easier world then. These forms of rearing are forms of psychological abuse. As you can see, in all these cases its all women.

whatever happened to good ole butt whooping! The problem with raising your kids in todays society is the government want to help raise your kids. Plus you got people who dont mind there business when you try to disipline your child in public. And the methods of these so called phyciatrist will only make the child more defiant. Its time to get medival on the kids today ans im a firm believer in a spankin my kids. Oh and if some people out there find my methods harsh well i tell you this, my kids have a 90 average and respect there parents as well as there elders and that my friends goes a long way.. So my suggestion is to stop humilating your kids because it makes you look unfit and use a belt and beat your name in there backside..

OK she went a little to far...kids probably did not mean to damage the tub...but she should have known metal toys in the bathtub would ruin it..she should be mad at herself.I am an 80's baby..when i was growing up my mother used work around the house as punishment.Not ordinary "clean the room" work but odd things like weeding the fence line..we lived on 3 acres of property that was fenced! If we were to do the dishes one evening and we didn't get them clean the first time we were to remove all of the dishes in the cupboard and wash them and dry them.WE would also have to help our neighbors out as well..i remember my brother and i were fighting over something and we were told to go next door and rake the leaves in our neighbors yard, bag them ,tie them and stack them.We counted 80 bags of leaves that day and we worked until sundown.We had to work together to get it done.I feel it taught us valuable lessons and work ethic..i wonder what the press would think of her now looking back ..would they view her as a bully or a child abuser?

I remember a day when my child was uncontrollable. I put him in the bathtub to try to calm him down and when that didn't work I hauled him out and wrapped him tightly in a blanket. It turned out that he had severe allergies and this behavior was a common symptom of that. Some of these parents think their children are supposed to always be perfect per their standards, to always do what they are told. Those kids are never going to grow up to take care of themselves.

I am 53. My Grandmother spanked my Mother - my Mother spanked me and my two younger sisters - I spanked my son, who is now 34. Here's something to think about. When I grew up there were hardly any incidents of children hitting parents or teachers. There were hardly, if any incidents where children killed other kids, parents, teachers or anyone else. None of my sisters or myself ever even thought of such a thing. Children respected their elders rather than DEMANDING everyone "respect" them as they curse, hit, kill, steal from, and generally abuse parents, siblings, school mates, teachers, store clerks - basically everyone they run across. Tell me - what's changed??? Raising our children has been taken out of our hands. No one has control over anything children do today. I will not allow any child to hit, kick, throw things at me or generally abuse me - I will get control. All it (usually) takes is for me to use that "Mom look" and children straighten up. I can't tell you how many times I've given that look to children who are running through stores, acting like animals, and tearing merchandise up which means higher prices for you and I to replace what has been destroyed. The usual result - they stop acting like crazy people and find Mom, (etc.) Children need to feel secure. Without boundaries, they do not feel this. They have no idea what they should and should not do. I have personally known parents who had absolutely NO control over their children and all it took from me was to tell them to behave and do what Mom or Dad wanted. Example - a parent of a child could not get his 3 year old into the car. When I walked out of the building, Dad was standing beside the child, who was throwing a fit in the middle of a parking lot. I told the 3 year old he needed to get into the car and go home with Dad. He did it. Simply because I told him to - I did not ask.
What will these children become????? The same thing they are now. Demanding. Selfish. Self-serving. People who think they can do anything they want without consequences. That is until they turn 18 ... and all of a sudden they follow societies rules or go to jail. Reality sets in then, for both the 18 year old and the parents.

I am so sick and tired of hearing about the outrage over "bully parenting". If it weren't for all the so called "experts" out there trying to sell their crap about alternative discipline, these stories wouldn't even exist. These parents are just trying to find alternative and creative ways to get through to their kids and that's exactly where they've gone wrong. My philosophy which I learned from James Dobson: child-hood folly = a warning; however, defiance = a spankable offense. Then move on with your lives and stop over analyzing parenting!

By holding the parents responsible for "child abuse" when they discipline their children without physical violence is creating a world where children are allowed - nay! encouraged - to be little freaking monsters!!!! Now, I do not advocate beating children, but I do think that in some cases children need something drastic -such as selling their toys (really? seliing a child's toy is child abuse? are you serious?) on e-bay is necessary. When will the bs end? When will we focus on the real criminals and not fabricate crimes in order to look better to the public? There are children living in "homes" where the parents are just evil, and do we go after them? Nopre, we focus all of our energy on detailing how emotional damaging it is to discipline children in any way, that we allow the children in real danger to be murdered and then what do we do .... nothing. That is the real shame. Our counrty is going to hell in a handbasket and we are allowing it ... I would even go so far as to say we are embracing it. Its tragic, really...

What did she do wrong?? Can't you see child abuse! There are different kinds of abuse. You don't have to use corporal punishment to
mentally abuse. That is even worse!

If you dont know whats wrong with this, then you need as much help as these parents do!!!