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Teen Drinking at Home: Helpful or Harmful?
Filed under: In The News, Alcohol & Drugs, Research Reveals: Teens
Parents have mixed feelings about serving alcohol to teens at home. Credit: Getty
Some parents allow their teens to have an occasional glass of wine or a beer at home, believing kids who drink in moderation at home will be less likely to binge drink at a club or party, where they'll be much more at risk, the Wall Street Journal reports.
Other parents, however, believe underage drinking is dangerous and illegal no matter where or how it occurs, the newspaper adds, and say it sends an irresponsible message to teens that could pave the way for alcohol abuse later on.
But, in reality, many parents do supply their teens with alcohol -- at least some of the time.
According to a report released last month by the Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration (SAMHSA), nearly 6 percent of 12- to 14-year-olds (about 700,000 middle school kids) have had an alcoholic drink in the past month, the Journal reports. Nearly 45 percent of those obtained the alcohol free at home, including 16 percent who got it from a parent or guardian. However, the survey doesn't detail how much alcohol was involved or under what circumstances, the newspaper adds.
"This report isn't designed to say, 'Bad parents!' It's designed to say, 'Here's an issue you should pay attention to,' " Peter Delany, director of SAMHSA's Center for Behavioral Health Statistics and Quality, tells the Journal. "When kids under age 15 start drinking and drinking heavily, they are about six times more likely to end up with alcohol problems."
But Stanton Peele, a psychologist and author of books on addiction, tells the Journal he's not convinced any type of drinking before the age of 15 sets kids up for the risk of alcohol problems later on.
"There's a giant difference between a kid who gets totally wasted on some purloined booze in the woods with his friends, and someone who has wine at dinner with their parents or as part of a religious ceremony," Peele tells the newspaper.
According to the 2009 National Survey on Drug Use and Health, 86 percent of American youths have used alcohol by the time they turn 21, and 50 percent are binge drinking, downing five or more drinks in a sitting for men and four or more for women.
Although 21 is the legal drinking age in the United States, 31 states allow parents, guardians or spouses to give alcohol to minors, with seven of those states allowing it in a private residence, the Journal reports. Thirty states allow minors to drink for religious reasons.
And though there hasn't been a lot of research on the role of parents in underage drinking, findings from the United States and Europe are mixed with regard to predicting binge drinking or problems with alcohol later in life, according to the newspaper.
But U.S. government agencies and quite a few alcohol-awareness organizations contend that no amount of underage drinking should be allowed, the Journal says. They say teens who drink are at a higher risk for being involved in motor vehicle accidents, homicides, suicides and accidents of all kinds, as well as unplanned sex, pregnancy and sexually transmitted diseases.
Studies also suggest alcohol can do long-term damage to brains that are still developing in teens and even young adults in their early 20s, the Journal reports.
Conflicting information and differing cultural norms leave many parents wondering how to handle the subject of alcohol with their children. Delany tells the newspaper he's been very clear about the dangers of alcohol and drugs with his own son, and suggests parents discuss upcoming situations with their teens.
"You can say, 'There may be a lot of people drinking. Have you thought about how you're going to handle that?' Then really listen to their answers," he says.
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ReaderComments (Page 4 of 8)
3-09-2011 @ 1:13AM
Stacina said...I had my first drink of wine when I was about 11 years old and did not like it. My father let me try beer when I was 17 and I thought it tasted like someone urinated in a can and added fiz. Just before I went off to college, my brother threw a huge party and made me drink til I was drunk. I ended up getting sick, waking up with a hangover and swore off drinking. I am 39 now and I am usually the designated driver because I rarely if ever touch the stuff because it just tasted bad to me and I did not like the feel of getting drunk. I have a 17 and 13 year old and offered them both a taste of wine at 12. Both hated it and said they wanted nothing to do with it. Anytime a bottle of any alcohol is opened in our home, they are offered it and they make disgusted faces and say it smells nasty and refuse to have any. If you take the mystery ouy of it, you take the appeal away as well. Stop treating kids and adults like morons that need to be policed. Open conversations and choices and fostering responsibility is the only way to get kids to become successful adults. Both my kids are honor students and genuinely good kids because we TALK to each other. It is a skill many families need to learn
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3-09-2011 @ 6:44AM
Ty said...Very well said.
3-09-2011 @ 9:35AM
JDRand said...When my 16 year old son (he's now 40) finished mowing the lawn on a hot summer day, he came into the house to find a cold beer waiting. That's when we had "the talk".
"You want a beer, have it here.
You don't get behind the wheel of a car if you've been drinking. Not even one beer!
You're out with friends and they start drinking, don't get in the car with them. Call me. I'll come get you - no matter what time, and no questions asked."
I've always felt that taking the "forbidden treat" out of the alcohol factor was a big deterrent - "Hell, I can have this at home where it's safe and I can crawl into my own bed. What's the big deal?"
It worked. The strongest word I can use to describe their 'habit' is "casual", or "special occasion", and they are all now in their 30's.
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3-09-2011 @ 7:15AM
Meredith said...I think that underage drinking depends on
1. The family
2. The boundaries set
3. The minor.
I am 18, and to some of you who think that it is completely irresponsible, I have a sip of wine at church every Sunday, and that means that I wouldn't have been able to have a celebratory glass of champagne at my brothers welcome home party after defending your freedom. In some families it is normal to have a glass of wine at a family dinner. Also it depends on the boundaries that have been set, what do you think is going to happen when you buy your children $86 worth of booze and then let them get in a car? And it really depends on what kind of person the minor is. Parents letting kids drink in the home isn't the problem, it's the boundaries that haven't been set to protect them.
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3-09-2011 @ 4:21AM
Viviane said...Even if drinking with parents does not create future drunks, it does send the message that we may (at our pleasure) abide by the laws that we please & like the example - disregard any laws that we do not agree with.
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3-09-2011 @ 5:28AM
rcoleman said...A brilliant article to send to mothers///especially the memorable MADD (mothers against drunk drivers)who were responsible for the legistlation that has ruined the lives of so many young adults who have had extreme measures taken against them for being caught with two drinks in them, and then now have a record, no drivers license, and such incredibly high insurance that they can no longer afford a car.No way to work, and their entry into adult life just unravels for MILLIONS of youth before it can even begin. Talk about overkill and idiocy! now they can be friends to their kids (another idiotic idea) and let their kids drink at home
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3-09-2011 @ 5:19AM
Judy said...It is never ok for a teen to drink booze anywhere or at anytime. Sadly todays so called parents (mostly deadbeat moms) are trying to be a childs friend and not being a parent at all. Wake up America. Be a parent to that child and do not let them booze it up anytime. That is why our children are turning into a bunch of saggy pants sideways idiot cap imoral confused knot heads that will not grow up until they are 40 years old. God bless America.
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3-09-2011 @ 5:43AM
geomcd said...Teens shouldn't be drinking anywhere. A parent who would allow this at home is an unfit parent.
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3-09-2011 @ 7:36AM
longwalker said...I grew up in the 1940's. In my neighborhood - Irish, German, Jewish, Italian & Jamaican, every family introduced their children to alcohol as soon as possible. Begining with a sip from mommy or daddy's glass as a toddler to, as a pre-teen, having a jelly glass of beer or wine at dinner on special occassions was the custom. We associated drinking with food and company and no one drank to get drunk. by the time I was a teen-ager, drinking was not associated with any mystery of adulthood. We had fewer drunken teenagers than today where getting drunk seems to be a rite of passage.
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3-09-2011 @ 7:52AM
melody said...I started drinking at 13. Not with my mom, but with peers, then the drinking started with my mom at home. I am 41 years old, I crossed the line. I lost the choice in drink, I was addicted. I do NOT blame anyone for this. Not all will have a drinking problem, some will. For me alcohol messes up my brain and makes me do and say things I am not proud of the next day, so my best thinking drove me to my knees. I could not live with booze I could not live without it either. Now I am a grateful recovering member of AA and it was the best decision in my life. I haven't had the need to drink in over 7 yrs and life is good. I have bad days just like anyone, but for me I was never mildly intoxicated, I was always insanely DRUNK.
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3-09-2011 @ 8:06AM
Bill said...If 18 is old enough to vote and go to war and kill people its old enough to drink.
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3-09-2011 @ 10:48AM
Bob said...you can't buy a gun at 18 but you are required to kill poeple with one if you go in the army at 18. If you go in the army which is the only way you will go to war, you have supervision at all times and if you hurt yourself or anything or anyone else you answere to Uncle Sam and the consequences can be severe.
3-09-2011 @ 8:15AM
Lori said...again, underaged drinking is illegal. ILlegal. What part of that word don't people understand? Plus you are telling your kid it's ok to underage drink. So I think these parents should be punished.
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3-09-2011 @ 11:52AM
Barbara said...In 31 of the 50 states, it is LEGAL for a parent to allow a child to have a drink in the home. Check it out.
3-09-2011 @ 8:25AM
kas said...Sorry, but the law is the law, and I will not send a message to my children that it's ok to break the law so long as you are in the presence of your parents. Let the kids be kids, and kids have no business drinking or smoking. I have a friend that has a daughter that was 17 last summer. We have places at a resort, and on saturday nights, she would let her daughter drink a beer or two or a mixed drink - plus we always had jello shooters and she would slip her several of those. One night, her 7 year old son wanted to know when he could start drinking! I had always voiced my concern about her letting her daughter drink, and after her 7 year old asked, she unfortunately had to start backtracking with her daughter and telling her no more, since it was affecting her brother. Unfortunately, I have caught the daughter trying to sneak a drink, and I have stepped in when the mom was not around, and told the mom. So that innocent little drink the mom thought was ok to have, has now turned into a problem. The daughter liked the high it gave her and doesn't want to give it up. It is creating a problem for the family now. Such a shame that parents don't think before they act. The drinking age was 18 when I was able to drink and my mother took me to dinner and that is when I had my first drink. My daughter is 27 has a child now; she started sneaking drinks at the age of 15 - I DID NOT KNOW - she now states how she regrets that lifestyle and tells my son to not make the mistakes she made. So far, at 16, he has listened to her. Parents, don't be blind to the fact that while you say you are in control of letting them have a drink, more than likely, since they drink at home, their tolerance is getting better, so than can drink outside the home, and you probably don't know it and are kidding yourself if you think they don't.
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3-09-2011 @ 8:49AM
Bev said...We are of Italian heritage and maybe thats why we thought it was ok once in a while for our children to have a glass of wine with a special dinner at home. Actually, they took a sip and thought it tasted horrible and never wanted it after that one time. It was offered and we would get back these weird looks with an answer of NO THANK YOU. If you take some of the curiousity out of something and do it in the right way you can make a large impact on your children. When they are with kids and those kids say lets get some booze my kids could always say no ty i've had it and don't like it.
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3-09-2011 @ 11:21AM
Meg said...That was how my parents raised me. To this day I still don't really like much alcohol, although I do indulge occasionally with one mixed drink about once a month.
3-09-2011 @ 9:18AM
zachiarose said...Unless it's for part of the Passover seder or you are in the Catholic Church having some sacred wine, there is absolutely no justification for your child to be given alcohol. First of all, it's illegal for underage drinking, and the parent that encourages the child to do so is breaking the law. Parents are supposed to be role models, teachers and guides to the children, not drinking buddies. Should the parents let their 10 year old drive the family car around the block? No license, and also against the law. As parents, we have the honor of raising our children...and it's our duty to make sure we do the right thing, to the best of our ability and common sense.
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3-09-2011 @ 8:54AM
bev said...Kas: The only reason that child is now sneaking drinks is because the Mother had a good idea but didn't know how to put it into play. Giving your children shooters etc is never something you should do. That is above and beyond. My parents never drank a thing and one day when i was in high school someone said the next day she was going to bring some gin in. Because my parents kept telling me it was bad bad bad and I never saw anything ever in the house I became curious. I had a drink that day with those girls and was caught and suspended for one week. My parents appologized to me saying they should have at least sat me down and explained why they thought it was bad. It left me curious and that is why I took that drink. I wasn't going to make the same mistake with my children and now they are grown and my way worked out great. Parents have to remember they have to do it tastefully and not give a kid shooters extra.
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3-09-2011 @ 8:58AM
Gael said...So...from the shining examples presented here, parents supplying a substance that is illegal to their underaged children is a good thing? Parents decide which laws they will uphold and which they will not. Parents who choose to obey the law are "controlling bastids". The testimony offered is that parents breaking the law in this manner removes the mystery and allure of the forbidden fruit of the vine. Ergo...the end justifies the means. Uh huh. Well each to his, or her own. Perhaps parents should do the same with sex, shoplifting, auto theft, arson --- yanno to remove the allure from the "forbidden", after all the end justifies the means.
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