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Filed under: Opinions, Teen Culture, Social & Emotional Growth: Teens
Is drug testing your kids a deterrent or a sign that you're not paying attention as a parent? Illustration by Dori Hartley
Drug Testing Kids in the Comfort of Home is So Not Comforting
by Dori Hartley
How do you know if your children are on drugs?
Look in their eyes. The eyes tell all.
Before purchasing that home drug test, understand that making your child submit to a test not only raises a red flag telling him you don't trust him, it's also humiliating for both of you.
Peeing into a cup is no picnic, but handing over your steaming hot specimen to Mom is downright icky.
Drug use shows itself in its user. And the only way you'd be justified to test your own kid is if you truly are blind to whom your child is. You either know your kid or you don't. And, if something is "different" about your child, chances are, you're going to perceive it.
Home drug testing is just another excuse for parents to become further removed from their children. If your kid is using, you'll know it way before the testing stage is necessary.
You don't need a test, you need a conversation.
Marijuana smoke, like cigarette smoke, is smelly. If you suspect your child is smoking, put your nose in his clothing and hair. There's no hiding the inescapable stench.
Pills affect speech. Amphetamines cause users to speak rapidly, often times with a dry mouth. Painkillers, which cause grogginess, can make people slur their words. Listen to your kid's speech.
And one thing no drug users get away with is what they reveal in their eyes: pin-pointed pupils, black hole dilation or just good old fashioned, stoned-out redness hidden behind sunglasses.
Ask your kid to take those shades off and take a look to see what's in front of you. A drug user will lie, but the drugs themselves are incapable of deceit. No amount of Visine can effectively hide "the look" one gets after indulging in any drug.
I know "the look." I grew up during the 1970s, a time in history when drugs were everywhere. On weekends, my wannabe-hippie, New York City parents would bring me to the peace and love mecca of all drug-abusing hubs -- Bethesda Fountain in Central Park.
We saw and smelled the clouds of marijuana smoke that hovered above the crowds, as bongos and congas pounded out eternally long versions of "Oye Como Va" and "Witchy Woman."
People smoked their hash pipes out in the open, unafraid of being busted. In their inebriated trances, they would dance naked, and, on occasion, someone would mount a statue and tell the world (in slow motion) how beautiful we all were, courtesy of the delusion given them by a widely used hallucinogen called LSD.
We watched Jimi Hendrix and Janis Joplin die from alcohol and heroin abuse. We saw the hippies at the fountain and we saw the stoners at school. We knew what it looked like, and it was all there, easily seen in the eyes.
The lesson? Pay attention to your children. Look for subtle changes. Communicate and ask them about their lives, their world. Get to know your kid, if you haven't already.
The question of whether or not we should perform home drug tests is really only the beginning of a series of questions that need to be asked. Because, if the results come back positive for drugs, the real question becomes: What are you going to do about it?
Put that in your pipe and smoke it.
Teens Will Be too Scared to Try Drugs If They Know You're Testing Them
by Jessica Samakow
From a young age, kids are conditioned to fear the dreaded time-out punishment.
"Share your markers or else you'll be put in time-out," they're told.
So, it's no secret that kids who then share their markers are doing so in order to avoid a time-out, not because they feel a moral obligation to lend the purple to their friend.
And, so, it makes sense that when it comes to testing teens for drugs, a similar precedent should prove to be just as effective.
Yes, it's true: When someone is high, the signs often are visible. The blood-shot eyes, the mad dash for munchies -- you've seen it all before.
However, relying on your own intuition to catch your kids in the act isn't as fool-proof as you'd like to think.
Face it: Your teen thinks you're naive. She knows your plate is full with a three-page to-do list. And she's not afraid to try sneak past you, burning red eyes and all.
And, if she does manage to hide her highness successfully, she's golden -- confident enough to try it again and again.
If teens want to do drugs, the small chance of being caught is not enough to stop them. But, if they knew you were going to drug test them on Friday, you better believe they'd think twice before lighting up that joint.
Being a teen not so long ago myself, I know the fear of getting caught is one of the biggest deterrences for kids who are hesitant to try drugs.
My friends who watched their older siblings receive a minor slap on the wrist for coming home high were the first ones to experiment themselves.
Other friends whose parents threatened to pull them off their athletic teams, or dole out other harsh punishments, were not so quick to get high, however.
If teens know they will be tested, and, therefore, definitely will be caught if they are guilty of doing drugs, they will be too scared to test the waters in the first place.
Plus, when their friends are pressuring them to give drugs a go, they can say "I can't, my parents test me," as an excuse.
They may be teased for having lame parents, but they won't be teased for being "lame" themselves.
I'm not saying every teen should face a weekly drug test -- for many it's unnecessary. But, if you do suspect that your teens may be involved in drugs, testing them is a sure way to find out -- and to stop them from doing it again.
Of course, you want your teens to make smart decisions on their own and choose not to experiment with drugs because of the morals you've instilled in them -- not because they're afraid they'll get caught.
But, when it comes to drugs, "learning the hard way" is not the best policy.
In this case, the "hard way" potentially can be deadly.
If you fear your teen is involved with drugs, stop her from using now, by means of drug testing, if necessary.
Let the morals come later.
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ReaderComments (Page 1 of 1)
3-24-2011 @ 3:29PM
jeff said...Jessica,
Great standpoint. Myteensavers has heard from parents that say that by merely having a test in the home was a HUGE deterrent. For parents that gave one, they say it allowed them to give more freedoms to their children. They were able to extend a teen's curfew or provide access to a family's car with the teen's understanding that they could be subjected to a drug test at any given time.
Home drug testing is the weapon families need to keep their kids on track. Unfortunately, Dori's assessment that you can see what a teen has been using, based on their eyes, is not a good enough indicator. A teen can be at a friend's sleepover and use in the 12-14 hours they are gone, and you would never know a thing. They can return home bright eyed and looking like a million dollars.
Teens are turning to pills. They get them from home, or maybe from grandma and grandpa's medicine cabinet, or they buy them from friends. They can use at 730AM, and be gone at school, and by the time mom and dad are home and interacting with them at 7PM, the high is long gone.
Myteensavers believes in home drug testing. We applaud Jessica for her stance on the subject!!!! There is a reason that the Teensavers Home Drug Test Kit just was awarded the "winner's" seal from Parent Tested Parent Approved (PTPA).
Reply
3-25-2011 @ 12:44AM
Not Sully @ As Seen on TV Life said...Yeah, I'm from the school of, "only of the parents test too."
- Not Sully @ As Seen on TV Life
Reply
3-25-2011 @ 11:54AM
jeff said...Parents should take the test with their kids. Clean parents have a better chance of raising clean kids. The entire household should be drug free!
Reply
3-25-2011 @ 10:26PM
sharonmaher5 said...Parents have the right to know if,how,when,an who is looking after their child. An what go's on in their family home. And if the reason should need be, then of cause thay have the right to know.
Reply
3-28-2011 @ 9:03AM
Chris R said...Children need to be monitored regarding drugs; and this is a parental resonsibiity as much as Government. I don't care about peoples' arguments about Cannabis is only a medicine (as suggested on other adult sites as Word Press etc) one partiuclar person contrbuting to that site must be hooked because he claims it is "medicinal".
Back in the 1700,s they thought a pint of Proof Rum was medicinal, beleiving it contained preservred Vitamin C (which it does not of course) and therefore prevented Scurvy. Which it didn't. It seems the same argument is being made about cannabis; unfortunately this mis-information is being filtered down the line; and like Chinese Whispers get distorted the furher it goes.
Certainly if my child came how regularly stoned, I would be the first to take him to my GP to be tested. The sooner you can stamp the habit on the head the better, and the move on to more serious drugs as Cocaine, Heroine etc. Again, something the Cannabis Brigade says doesn;t happen, but I am quite sure it does. It is mind altering- we know that much.
I would not endorse a parent taking a blood test with a needle and Syringe, that would only encourage experimintation; but certainly a trip [sic] down to the GP would not go a miss. In the same way if you suspected your (under-age) daughter to be pregnant or having unprotected sex; see the GP and have her placed on the "pill", which YOU dispense. You can deal with the boy who is having intercouse illegally with her later.
Parents need to take greater responsibility regarding drugs and other substances, indeed the welfare of their children instead, as so many do expect the State and Schools to bring up their children. And whilst on the subject: WHY does a 6 year old need to know about sexual inter course, and contraception ?
Which was being suggested to be placed in to the National curriculum before this Government was formed.
Certainly I would be concerned if my 6 year old came home and used words like, penis, vagina, erection etc, when those terms had never been used at home. We have enough problems with teenage pregnancies, without encouraging it !
Reply
3-29-2011 @ 11:34AM
Brendan said...First of all, Chris, it sounds like you got your information straight from the ONDCP website. Modern clinical trials are showing quite strongly that cannabis (the proper name for marijuana) has medicinal properties. Recent studies have shown that cannabis may have anti-tumoral properties, meaning that in some test subjects, cannabis and cannabinoids have been shown to kill cancer cells, while at the same time leaving surrounding healthy cells intact. Cannabis has also been shown to have analgesic effects on neuropathic pain, such as the pain from HIV, MS, and RA, all of which produce pain which cannot be easily controlled by current pharmaceutical drugs. This is the reason that pharmaceutical companies are currently trying like mad to create cannabis based medicines, including medicines utilizing THC, the primary psychoactive chemical in cannabis. However, this article was not about the medicinal properties of cannabis, so this is kind of an aside.
My main point: drug testing is absolutely worthless unless you're trying to catch your kids smoking cannabis. Drug tests are designed to catch primarily cannabis use. THC is fat soluble, and is stored in fatty tissues, where it remains for anywhere from a couple weeks to a couple months depending on use patterns. This means that if you detect THC in your kids urine, it could be from yesterday or a couple months ago, and shows no proof of current drug use. All other drugs - painkillers, heroin, cocaine, amphetamines, even hallucinogens - are water soluble, meaning that metabolites are flushed from your system within a couple days. For those of you who are unaware, metabolites, or the remnants of drugs in your excretion, are what drug tests measure. They do not measure current levels of drugs in your system. They will tell you if someone has used in the past, not if they are high or using right now. If your kids are using any of these substances recreationally (less than daily use) the odds of catching them on a drug screen are very slim. So if your kid is using a dangerous drug, you won't know. Also, parents should be aware that most drug tests are not even designed to detect hallucinogens (mushrooms, LSD, DMT, peyote) at all.
Additionally, being in the same age cohort as Ms. Samakow, I can attest that the spectre of drug testing does NOT act as a deterrent to drug use. I did not use drugs as a teenager, but not because I was afraid of the big bad drug test. I simply had zero desire to use drugs. The few times I had smelled cannabis, it seemed absolutely disgusting and I had no desire to try it. I never tried other drugs because I had never been high before, and had no desire to be. These feelings were absolutely unrelated to drug testing. If the circumstances had been different and I had wanted to use drugs, drug testing still would have played no role in my decision making process. Kids are stubborn, and if they want to try something they will. Testing them will not stop them. If anything, it will push them away from relatively benign drugs such as cannabis toward more dangerous, less detectable drugs such as heroin, coke, and LSD.
The best way to address teen drug use is, as Ms. Hartley suggested, to sit down with your kids and talk with them openly. I am not talking about taking them down to Bethesda Fountain to frolic with the junkies; I am talking about sitting down with your kids and talking honestly and deeply about the causes and consequences of drug use. I would suggest possibly watching a few episodes of A&E's Intervention with your kids and discussing what you see with them. While I take some issue with the fact that they focus primarily on drug use as the issue - addiction goes far deeper than simple use, and at its root, addiction is a human trait largely unrelated to drug use - they provide a pretty accurate portrayal of the effects addiction issues can have on a person's life. Controlled exposure can be a far more effective deterrent than the threat of arbitrary punishment.
3-28-2011 @ 9:04AM
Chris R said...Agreed .
Children tend to copy their parents as they see it as the norm.
And if their are drugs and syringes lying around, they are more likely to experiment.
I had a close shave with an anti convulsant drug called "Pheonbarbitone" in the 1960s, which was used to control my epilesy. I had a massive fit in 1971, and placed on (what later turned out to be an adult dose), and then because my neurologist retired and had written a Sine Die prescription (something you cannot do in the UK anymore) my mother just kept picking up the medication and dispensing it.
Some 5 years later we went abroad and needed supplementary vaccinations,that I passed out in the surgery. It was not until I had been brought round and my mother asked for an interim prescription that we discovered that I had been on an adult dose for four years longer than I should have been on even a juvinile dose.
So : 1. Parents should keep an eye on what their children are
taking and noting any unsual behaviour.
2. ALL Drugs from Asprin/ Paracetamol upwards should be
kept in a secure medicine chest. out of the reach, and
unlockable by children
3.. If the child is on some sort of medication, to control
whatever condition: whether that be condition may be, then
as in the UK the Doctor should be calling the child in once
a year to assess the situation; and if the child doesn't
then the parent should be.
These are called parental responsibilites, and these days it seems that many parents are too quick to hand those over to other people.
Reply
3-30-2011 @ 7:49AM
Terrell H. said...I am a certified substance abuse counselor and I work with juveniles who are also in the court system. The physical effects/signs are the probable causes to do the UDS (urine drug screen). If the test is positive (which means the drug is in their system), then you have documented proof...then it's no longer "you look like you are high" or "act like your high." Kids have a trillion excuses and they may use any one of them to keep themselves from getting into trouble. How you have parented prior to the question of their drug use and what action you take after you have proof they did or are using, is not part of this discussion. The sad and frustrating situation is when the child doesn't care and knows neither you as the parent or the court system (in NC anyway) can do anything about it. Teach you kids well!
Reply
3-30-2011 @ 3:49PM
Douglas said...Hi my name is Douglas Chinchar and I am the creator of the KNOW Drug Test, Inc. (knowdrugtest.com). I am not a beleiver in drug testing kids, because if you do, you better follow up with your threat. I beleive in education and conversation. That is why we created this unique "tool" to help parents. FOX TV has been incredible about showing our new product across the country. www.youtube.com/user/Knowdrugtest1#p/u/0/zj6L1y83PgE
Many of you have insurance on your cell phones and other "important" items (all replaceable). Isn't in time that we have some insurance on our teens making good decisions? Good luck! We are always here to help.
Reply