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custody-related stories
'The Kids Are All Right' Sibling Authors Say Being Separated Was Worse Than Parents' Death
Divorce & Custody, Relatives, Siblings, Development, In The News, Extreme Childhood, Amazing Kids, Books
What's quickly apparent about the four Welch siblings in their powerful new memoir, "The Kids Are All Right," is that these are "kids" in age only.
Ages 4 to 16 when their father died in a car crash, Amanda, Liz, Dan and Diana Welch learned one month later that their mother, soap opera star Ann Williams, who appeared in "Loving," "The Edge of Night" and countless other soaps, has been diagnosed with cancer.
The "kids" quickly take on adult roles -- driving without a license to shop for groceries, helping chose their father's coffin, paying back their cheapskate uncle for the cost of burying their mother, cleaning their mother's colostomy bags.
Japan Tough on Divorced Fathers
Divorce & Custody, In The News, Weird But True, Single parenting
Japanese kids whose parents divorce end up with Mom 90 percent of the time, leaving Dad out of the picture. Credit: makistar, Flickr
Christopher Savoie's ex-wife defied their American custody agreement and fled with their two children to Japan.
Now even though she broke the law, he's in jail.
Japan is notoriously unsympathetic to single fathers, according to The Associated Press. The law almost always sides with the mother.
Savoie followed his ex-wife to Japan. As the children entered school, he grabbed them and dashed for the American consulate. Japanese police were waiting and arrested him.
They threw the Tennessee father in jail -- even though the court back home in Williamson County granted him full legal custody of 8-year-old Isaac and 6-year-old Rebecca when his Japanese ex-wife violated the law and left the U.S.
Judge Tells Mom: Punish Kids For Skipping Visits With Dad
Kids 8-11, Divorce & Custody, In The News
Australian kids who want to skip visits with dad may find themselves without video games, television or other favorite pastimes.
A judge has ordered a mother to deny her children privileges until they comply with a court order requiring them to spend time with their father.The judge said noncustodial parents need to "positively encourage" visitation and start "removing privileges if the child was defiant," according to an article in The Australian.
The father asked the court to intervene when his children chose to walk home to their mother's house rather than meet him for a scheduled after-school visit. The 43-year-old dad later received a call from his ex who told him the boys, aged 11 and 12, "did not wish to go with them," according to the article.
The problem is "very prevalent" among American fathers as well, Mitchell K. Karpf, chair of the American Bar Association's Family Law section, told ParentDish.
Judges here have the power to enact similar rulings after a divorce, he said.
"Mom does have an obligation to say you're going to see your dad and if you don't you're grounded," said Karpf, who practices in Florida.
Judges also can take parents to task for badmouthing former spouses or preventing visitation.
A Florida court once ordered a mother to tell her children that it was "her desire" that they see and love their father, Karpf said. Encouraging children to maintain relationships with both parents makes sense, according to the American Psychological Association. Children in joint custody arrangements have fewer behavior issues, do better in school and have higher self esteem, according to a 2002 study published in the Journal of Family Psychology.
Missing Boy Found in Secret Room
Divorce & Custody, In The News, Weird But True
Richard Chekevdia, right, poses with his father Michael Chekevdia in August of 2007. Credit: Chekevida Family/AP
An abducted boy at the center of a heated custody fight was found in a secret room at his grandmother's house, where his mother allegedly hid him for the past two years.
According to "The Early Show," Richard "Ricky" Chekevdia was in good health when he was found behind a false wall in the Southern Illinois home of his grandmother, Diane Dobbs. Ricky, who will be 7 on Sept. 14, had been missing since November 2007.
The boy's father, Michael Chekevdia, told The Chicago Tribune that he was thrilled to learn that his son was alive and well.
"Two years? You have no idea," Chekevdia, a 48-year-old former police officer who's a lieutenant colonel in the Illinois National Guard, told The Chicago Tribune on Saturday. "I've lost sleep. I've lost weight. I've gained weight. I wouldn't wish this on anybody."
Just before Ricky and his mother, 30-year-old Shannon Wilfong, disappeared, Chekevdia was granted temporary custody of his son. He told "The Early Show" that he has always suspected that Dobbs was hiding the boy and his mother in Dobbs' Benton, Ill. home.
Ricky and Wilfong, have been living in a hideaway roughly 5-feet-by-12-feet and about the height of a washing machine. Wilfong has been charged with felony child abduction and her mother, Dobbs, has been charged with aiding and abetting.
According to "Good Morning America," Dobbs said that she helped her daughter hide Ricky to protect him from his father. Authorities, she said, failed to investigate allegations of sexual abuse leveled by Ricky's mom.
"We were on our own and we had to do what we had to do and that was make sure our grandson was safe," Dobbs said, adding that the crawl spaces were there when she bought the house 14 years ago.
"I was investigated three times, and I complied with everybody's desires and wishes in those investigations, and every one of those investigations were unfounded," Mike Chekevdia told "Good Morning America."
Dobbs had been released on $1,000 bail, but according to "Good Morning America," she was arrested again on Sept. 7 on charges of harassing a witness.
And how is Ricky? In great spirits, according to his rescuers. "Surprisingly," Illinois State Police Master Sgt. Stan Diggs told "The Today Show," "Ricky is in very good spirits. For someone who's been isolated in that house with no other outside beings, he's a very social, very polite, very talkative little boy."
Ricky is currently in the custody of the state, but a southern Illinois judge told CBS News that the goal is to reunite father and son. Judge Kyle Vantrease set a Nov. 23 court date for the custody issue, and he added that Chekevdia will likely have several visits with the boy until that time.
Nontraditional Families Becoming More Traditional
The traditional family may be going the way of men in suits and women in pearls. Photo: Getty Images
Michael Jackson's death has brought this issue front and center. Who will now raise his children, Prince Michael, Paris, and Blanket? All three were raised from birth exclusively by their father. Jackson's ex-wife, Debbie Rowe, publicly gave up all claims to Prince Michael and Paris shortly after their births; however, Michael Jackson's death has led to a custody hearing, set for July 20, to declare a temporary guardian for the children. Rowe plans to attend this hearing, even though she is not legally required to be there and has said she has no interest in suing for custody. Should she have a say in who raises them? Furthermore, since Rowe was not named in Jackson's will as a potential guardian, so does she really have any business getting involved now that Michael is gone?
Some nontraditional families come together for other reasons. The late Byrd and Melanie Billings, who were tragically murdered in their Florida home last week, were such people. The Billings were a modern-day, magnanimous sort of Brady Bunch -- each had two children from previous marriages. During the 18 years they were married, they adopted 13 special-needs children, whose disabilities ranged from autism to Downs syndrome.
Parents who have gone the surrogacy route have an interesting task of explaining the facts of life and what constitutes their family to their kids. These parents also have the decision of whether or not to include the surrogate parent into the family, which creates more discussion of who exactly is part of the family.
Michael Jackson's Mother Gets Custody of His Children
Paris and Prince Jackson, uncovered. Photo: X17online
In the onslaught of news about Michael Jackson's death, this announcement would seem like a mere detail: On Monday, Jackson's 79-year-old mother, Katherine, was granted temporary guardianship of his children. For most families, the idea that a grandparent would step in and take charge in a crisis is a given, but for the Jackson clan, it's not that simple.
Jackson was raising his children alone. His ex-wife, Debbie Rowe, who is the mother of Prince Michael, 12, and Paris, 11, surrendered her parental rights in the couple's divorce, while Jackson's youngest son, Prince Michael II, or "Blanket," was born to an anonymous surrogate. But in the last week, all sorts of rumors have been swirling around about who wants the kids and what their legal rights may be. Debbie Rowe reportedly told a British tabloid that she had no desire to seek custody, but her representatives are now saying that the interview never happened. Rowe also reportedly claimed that Jackson is not her children's biological father, although it's unclear how true that claim is either. But it does raise questions about the paternity of all three children, and about the best options for permanent custody.
In the face of ongoing chaos it makes sense that the children would go to live with their grandmother. Court documents fiiled by Katherine Jackson assert that the children "have a long established relationship with [their] paternal grandmother and are comfortable in her care." During his 2005 trial for child molestation, Joe and Katherine Jackson told Barbara Walters they would pursue adoption of the children if Michael lost custody.
Jackson is reported to have a good relationship with his mother, but his relationship with Joe Jackson was far more complicated. The singer and his siblings had accused Joe Jackson of abusing them as children, and Joe himself admitted to cheating on his wife and fathering a daughter out of wedlock. Katherine and Joe Jackson are still married but have not lived together since the 1980s, and only Katherine has been granted custody of her grandchildren. Joe, however, has resumed his role as spokesperson for the family, telling the press this week, "This is where they belong ... we love those kids ... we're going to take care of them." But is that what Michael would have wanted?
Michael Jackson
Michael Jackson, center, wearing a traditional Arabic woman's veil and all-covering gown called an abaya, with his son, Prince Michael II, also veiled, as they walk in Bahrain in 2006.
Hasan Jamali, AP
Michael Jackson, center, is supported by his security personnel as he walks into the courthouse with his father Joe Jackson, right, after arriving late to Santa Barbara County Superior Court, on March 10, 2005.
Kimberly White, Pool / AP
Michael Jackson applauds his fans while on top of his car after his arraignment on child molestation charges in Santa Maria, California on January 16, 2003.
Hector Mata, AFP / Getty Images
Michael Jackson's booking photo and personal information shown in this copy of a release from the Santa Barbara County Sheriff's Department after Jackson was booked on child molestation charges in Santa Barbara, CA, on November 20, 2003.
Santa Barbara County Sheriff's Department / AP
Michael Jackson holds his eight-month-old son Prince Michael II over the balcony of the Adlon Hotel in 2002 in Berlin, Germany. Jackson was in Berlin with his three children to accept a lifetime achievement award.
Olaf Selchow, Getty Images
Minders escort the veiled children of Michael Jackson as they visit the Berlin Zoo in November 2002.
Sadek Hamaiel, Getty Images
Michael Jackson holds an unidentified child as he stands in the window of his suite in the Adlon hotel in Berlin.
Jockel Finck, AP
A masked Jackson traveling in Berlin, Germany.
Eric Richard, Getty Images
Michael Jackson testifies during his civil trial in Santa Maria Superior Court on December 3, 2002 in Santa Maria, California.
Jim Ruyman, Pool / Getty Images
Michael Jackson testifies in Santa Barbara County Superior Court, on November 13, 2002 in Santa Maria, CA.
Spencer Weiner, Pool / AP
Michael Jackson's Children Face Uncertain Future
Michael Jackson
Michael Jackson, center, wearing a traditional Arabic woman's veil and all-covering gown called an abaya, with his son, Prince Michael II, also veiled, as they walk in Bahrain in 2006.
Hasan Jamali, AP
Michael Jackson, center, is supported by his security personnel as he walks into the courthouse with his father Joe Jackson, right, after arriving late to Santa Barbara County Superior Court, on March 10, 2005.
Kimberly White, Pool / AP
Michael Jackson applauds his fans while on top of his car after his arraignment on child molestation charges in Santa Maria, California on January 16, 2003.
Hector Mata, AFP / Getty Images
Michael Jackson's booking photo and personal information shown in this copy of a release from the Santa Barbara County Sheriff's Department after Jackson was booked on child molestation charges in Santa Barbara, CA, on November 20, 2003.
Santa Barbara County Sheriff's Department / AP
Michael Jackson holds his eight-month-old son Prince Michael II over the balcony of the Adlon Hotel in 2002 in Berlin, Germany. Jackson was in Berlin with his three children to accept a lifetime achievement award.
Olaf Selchow, Getty Images
Minders escort the veiled children of Michael Jackson as they visit the Berlin Zoo in November 2002.
Sadek Hamaiel, Getty Images
Michael Jackson holds an unidentified child as he stands in the window of his suite in the Adlon hotel in Berlin.
Jockel Finck, AP
A masked Jackson traveling in Berlin, Germany.
Eric Richard, Getty Images
Michael Jackson testifies during his civil trial in Santa Maria Superior Court on December 3, 2002 in Santa Maria, California.
Jim Ruyman, Pool / Getty Images
Michael Jackson testifies in Santa Barbara County Superior Court, on November 13, 2002 in Santa Maria, CA.
Spencer Weiner, Pool / AP
Who will end up raising Michael Jackson's three children? No one is sure right now. The fate of Prince Michael, 12, Paris, 11, and 6-year-old Prince Michaell II ("Blanket") may be decided in a courtroom. Debbie Rowe, mother to Prince and Paris, allegedly gave up her parental rights to the kids not once, but twice. Jackson never publicly acknowledged who Blanket's mother was, claiming that the child was conceived using a surrogate he never met "and my own sperm cells."
"If the [surrogate] mother did not relinquish her parental rights, she can seek custody," attorney Gloria Allred told the "New York Daily News" yesterday. "If he indicated in his will the person whom he wishes to serve as guardian, then the court will give great weight to his preference." But who Jackson might have named as guardian is still a mystery.
What's left of the singer's vast but dwindling fortune (reports say that Jackson was $500 million in debt at the time of his death) is certain to play a role in the legal battler over the children, and some sources close to the family said that ex-wife Rowe may take custody of all three kids, despite her earlier relinquishment of her rights.
What is certain is that there are three kids who woke up this morning without a father. No matter how flawed Jackson may have been, there were small people who depended on him, and whose world will never be the same again. The lavish lifestyle bestowed on them by their increasingly indebted dad has disappeared, and any stability they may have had along with it. Our hearts go out to the Jackson kids.
Chinese New Year, Alyson Hannigan, and a Smoking Toddler - Links we Love
Monday is the first day of the Chinese New Year (this year is the Year of the Ox). Get your kids in the spirit with these cute DIY lanterns. -- AlphaMomHow is Alyson Hannigan staying fit during her first pregnancy? By doing Pilates, of course. -- Celebrity Baby Blog
Sure, winter makes all feel like we want to hunker down with a big bowl of comfort food, so here are some healthier winter treats for you and your kids.-- LilSugar
How does a three-year-old learn to light a cigarette? In this case, from his mom, who lets him smoke. - MomLogic
We want our kids to be independent, but when the time comes to let them test their skills ... how do we let go? One mom shares her story. -- Mommy Track'd
The American Family Association continutes their attacks on Campbell's soup by asking schools to stop collecting soup labels. Are they taking their fight too far? Share your thoughts with us. -- Offsprung
So you and your former partner are raising a child. Who gets to decide what, if any, religion the child is raised in? -- Work it, Mom!
Ever wonder how much your baby or toddler will remember? More than you think. Read more about "childhood amnesia" and how memory affects a child as they grow. -- Babble
Man Sues Ex-Wife for Hiding Voice Recorder in Teddy Bear
Divorce & Custody, Health & Safety, Behaving Badly
Divorce is rarely a pretty thing. Throw in children and custody battles have been known to get pretty ugly (Alec Baldwin and Kim Basinger, anyone?). Many times, the children end up in the middle, and in at least one instance, so did their toys.
William Lewton of Omaha is suing his ex-wife for allegedly planting a voice recorder inside the head of their daughter's cherished teddy bear! The ex, Dianna Divingnzzo, also allegedly had private investigators tracking Lewton for months trying to turn up dirt on him that would prove him an unfit parent. A judge in the case is throwing out the recordings, citing the Nebraska law making voice recording illegal unless at least one of the parties being recorded authorizes it. And, as you would imagine, neither Lewton nor the bear provided such approval.
What's more, the legal folks think what Dianna did constitutes a felony. Her lawyers, upon hearing of the recorder's discovery, dropped her! Lewton has been provided partial custody allowing him to see and take care of his daughter about 50% of the time. Others, including Lewton's fiancée and several court-appointed workers, have joined him in the lawsuit stating their privacy was violated as well. If his ex-wife ends up in prison for the voice recorder then he may get even more than that!
Moral of the story? Leave the toys, and the kids, out of it.
Divorced Mom Not Allowed to Have Lesbian Partner in Home
A divorced Tennessee mom of two was recently told by the court that her lesbian partner of nine years can no longer "sleep over" when her kids are in the home. The reason? A "paramour restriction" imposed by a judge, despite the fact that a psychological evaluation found the woman to be a positive influence on her partner's children.Meanwhile, the woman's ex-husband shares his home with his wife of five years, who gets to "sleep over" whenever she wants.
Why the double standard? According to the ACLU, the judge thought he was mandated by law to put the restriction in place, ignoring the fact that the family had been a cohesive unit for most of the kids' lives. The ruling, which is being appealed, has forced the couple to live in a duplex so that they can abide by the law while still being able to see each other.
Britney Spears' son rushed to hospital
Toddlers, Celeb Kids, Celeb Parenting
Britney Spears' son Jayden was rushed to the hospital on Sunday, after suffering an apparent allergic reaction. Britney and her sons are visiting family in Kentwood, Louisiana. At some point in the afternoon, he became "vague and unresponsive," certainly alarming behavior for an active two-year-old. He also developed hives.Britney called emergency services, who directed her to drive Jayden directly to the ER. A witness says the entire family went together. "They tore off so fast, it was incredible." The boy remains hospitalized so that doctors can keep an eye on him, but he's reportedly doing fine.
This was the first time Britney was allowed to take the boys out of state on her own since Kevin Federline was awarded custody. If she's doing anything but worrying right now (which isn't likely), she has to be thinking that even when she's not looking for trouble, it seems to find her.
Madonna wants A-Rod's baby
Love & Sex, Pregnancy & Birth, Adoption, Divorce & Custody, Fun & Activities, Bump Watch, Life & Style, Celeb Parenting, Rumors, Behaving Badly, Weird But True, Media
Seriously, folks--can you feel the media struggling? Yes, this is an actual headline, somewhere. According to a new "report" Madonna, soon to be divorced, is keen to have a baby with baseball superstar Alex Rodriguez. A-Rod, who if you'll recall recently separated from his wife, Cynthia, about ten minutes after she gave birth to their second child together, was alleged to have made the split to make more room for Madge and her Kaballah-loving ways. I find this hysterical as Madonna could clearly kick A-Rod's butt, so I'm not sure why she'd want to have a baby with him. But hey, love--or lust, whatever--is strange.
Not so sure that's true. My guess is that being married to a celebrity, and a sports legend, can take its toll. Now the tabloid pendulum has swung the other way, and claims are being made that A-Rod, while not necessarily having anything to do with the material mom's breakup with director Guy Ritchie, wants to be as close to her as possible and is set to purchase a home a hop-skip from her Manhattan abode. Madonna is alleged to want to take custody of her kids and move them to New York permanently, which of course won't sit well with Guy.
To juice things up a little more, now the mill is spinning that the fifty-year-old thinks A-Rod is prime baby making material and wants to get her hands on his, er, goods, to make another baby. Madonna is already mom to Lourdes, Rocco and David Banda. It's also rumored that she is set to adopt again from Malawi. If both are true, Madge's baby count will be a mere five compared to Angelina's six (and looking for one to grow on, making her count a magical seven). This means Madonna is NOT number one in at least one thing, for now. instead she'll just have to settle for being super pop star ruler of the world. Unless she and A-Rod can knock out some twins. Work it, Madge!
Now all this garbage aside, if A-Rod and Madonna had a baby, this kid would be both beautiful and an athletic superstar, no? Just don't let him/her get those highlight tips that A-Rod's always sporting....
Christie Brinkley - Concerned mom or interfering ex?
Divorce & Custody, Celeb Parenting, Behaving Badly
Knowing that his recent 20/20 interview discussing his divorce would hurt their kids, Peter Cook and Christie Brinkley did the smart thing and got their kids out of town the night it aired. (Though one could argue that it isn't smart to air your dirty laundry in public in the first place). But before he could leave, his method of transportation caused an even bigger ruckus.As Peter was planning to put his children on a single engine airplane, his daughter Sailor, 10, reportedly called mom Christie Brinkley in tears, because she was afraid to board the plane. Christie survived a 1994 helicopter crash and now always flies her family in bigger aircraft. Christie allegedly called the police, attempting to stop the plane from taking off with the kids on board, even offering to pay for a flight on a larger plane.
Because Peter wasn't doing anything technically illegal, the family was allowed to continue on with their trip. According to a source from the Cook camp, "They left and had a wonderful flight." Peter is trying to spin the incident as just another opportunity for Christie to interfere with his time with the kids. But sources close to Christie say that this has always been a family rule, and that as sole custodial parent, she has the right to make that decision.
Just another celebrity couple reminding us that divorce is never easy, but that a Hollywood divorce comes with it's own set of problems. What do you think?
Part-time parents have it tough
Just For Dads, Divorce & Custody, Single parenting
After more than twenty-five years in the business, the shine is definitely off the industry in which I've toiled for so long. And yet, I go to work every morning and trudge through the day, not taking off for Botswana to bum around in an old Land Rover. Why? Because of the kids. I couldn't imagine not being around them, hugging them, hearing Jared say he loves me and watching Sara climb things. I didn't set out to be a parent but, like someone who expects lengua to taste terrible but tries it anyway and loves it, I am now, first and foremost, a father.But what if I weren't able to see the kids every day? What if I weren't around all the time to take them to school and cook them dinner and hug them in the middle of the night when the monsters come calling? That must be what it's like to be a single parent. Such is the tale of William Leith who shares custody of his three-year-old son with his ex-wife; Leith sees his son for half a week at a time.
Leith has written a very touching and sadly informative piece about what being a part-time dad means for him. "...even after three and a half years. My son! I don't usually go more than three days without seeing him. But sometimes it feels like a long time not to see your son." I could imagine going three days without seeing the kids -- perhaps on a business trip or something -- but it would certainly be a rarity. I don't think I've gone more than a day without seeing them since they were born. That would be like walking around without an arm -- or a heart.
Check out Leith's article; I know it made me think about life without the kids and strengthened my resolve not to miss out on their lives. I joke that I would never get a divorce because my wife would stick me with the kids but, in reality, the exact opposite is true. I don't want to have to visit my kids.
Sharon Stone wanted to botox son's feet?
Kids 8-11, Divorce & Custody, Health & Safety, Medical Conditions, Life & Style, Celeb Parenting, Rumors, Behaving Badly, Childcare, Single parenting
Given the spate of media bs floating around the Internet these days part of me finds it hard to believe a rumor that anyone would want to botox their kid's feet. Then, part of me realizes the drama is surrounding Sharon Stone and thinks there could be a kernel of truth to the rumor. After all, the actress and one-time sexpot has basically gone off the wall in recent years, making crazy statements and acting crazy in general--and it no longer seems like a publicity stunt to draw attention and viewers to Basic Instinct 2.
Stone is mom to eight-year-old Roan, and her custody of him is currently under question. Allegedly she has lost custody of her son after overreacting to his foot odor by thinking he should get botox in his feet. According to reports (rumors!) the judge agreed that Stone was overreacting and causing pain to her child, and has granted primary custody to the actress' ex, Phil Bronstein. Sharon will get to see him one weekend a month.
That seems so terrible for a mother to lose custody of her child and to only be able to see him on a monthly basis. I would be crushed if that happened to me. Of course, as crazy and hormonal as I am in the last stages of pregnancy, I still wouldn't think it was a good idea to botox my son's feet. Poor Sharon--she really must be suffering from some sort of emotional disorder or complications from her brain surgery to make those sorts of decision (if they're true, and they appear to be).
