The Mom Celebrity Translator

Here's another bit of brilliance from the gang at Saturday Night Live! How many Moms out there can relate? –MT
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Marlo wants to tickle our parenting funny bones!

Parenthood Study Shows Moms, Dads Extol the Joy of Raising Kids to Justify the Expense

Money, money, money! Parents justify the high cost of having kids by gushing about the joys of parenthood. Credit: Getty
Having children is, uh, great. Yeah, great.
No, really. You have to pity those childless souls with their free ...
Parents claim children are worth every dime the little $#@! leeches suck out of you.

Do Parents Kid Themselves About How Happy They Are to Have Children?

Are parents really that happy to have kids? Credit: Corbis
According to a new study from Canada, "Parents may create rosy pictures of parental joy as a way to justify the huge investment that children require," UPI reports.
We all k...
We all know kids are great. But is it possible that we overcompensate for the fact that they are also incredibly expensive by going overboard saying how wonderful it is to be a parent?

Opinion: Life in the School Pick-Up Lane Keeps Kids From a 'Street Education'

Start spreading the news: A gritty school commute provides a great education. Illustration by Dori Hartley Each weekday, I hop into my crappy little car and drive 20 uninspiring highway miles to take my kid to and from school. I make t...Today's school car commutes put this mom in a New York state of mind.

Report Card Day Could Include Grades for Parents Under Proposed Florida Bill

Kids may not be the only ones receiving report cards in Florida. Credit: Getty Ever feel like your kid's teacher is judging you based on how many field trips you've chaperoned, what you pack in his lunch box or the state of Junior's ho...Florida bill could have teachers grading parents as well as students.

Stealing: Lessons for a 4-Year-Old

I took the kids to the pet store on this Martin Luther King Jr. holiday morning, thinking we'd get bird seed to make peanut butter and bird seed pine cones this afternoon. We love all the birds that come to our yard, and even keep a running list of a...This is one of those moments where you know you have to make a stand, hoping it sticks so that the offense is never repeated.

'Are You Giving Me This Atomic Wedgie Because You Miss Your Daddy?'

Excuse me, bully, but could your mean streak be due to Daddy issues? Credit: Getty Say, kids, the next time the school bully is giving you an atomic wedgie, try looking deep into his eyes with a sympathetic expression and tell him, "...Bullies might not be getting enough Daddy Time.

I Don't Like Babies

I don't do babies well. I'm not sure why. I love my children. I dare you to even question that. Double dog dare you. But the baby part? Not so much. If I could have someone deliver more of my progeny to me only once they are able to talk and sle...If I could have someone deliver more of my progeny to me only once they are able to talk and sleep through the night, I'd have eleventeen more kids.

Yearbook Blacks Out Kids' Eyes for Fear of Porn Potential

Guess who, Mr. Child Pornographer? Credit: Daily Mail / Anorak News
What would you do if you got your kids' yearbook and all the eyes had been blacked out with magic marker? Personally, I'd try to wake up. But at a school in England, the princ...
A principal in England had the students' eyes blacked-out of the school yearbook

Stop Capital Punishment: Say No to Official Parenting Philosophies

Recently, feminist Erica Jong wrote a piece in the Wall Street Journal on today's popular parenting methods and how she feels they imprison mothers. She believes philosophies like Attachment Parenting or Green Parenting have "encouraged female vict...Why are we judging other moms on their parenting philosophies?

Amazon Yanks Pedophile "Guidebook" After Twitter Storm

"The Pedophile's Guide to Love and Pleasure" is no longer available on Amazon. Credit: Amazon
When Catherine Connors clicked on a link in a friend's Twitter stream Wednesday afternoon, she found herself looking at a guide to enjoying pedophilia. ...
When one mom clicked on a link in a friend's Twitter stream Wednesday afternoon, she found herself looking at a guide to enjoying pedophilia.

Should You Explain Suicide to Young Kids?

My oldest just turned 9. His innocence is still fairly solid, but I see the edges starting to fray a bit. I'm not ready. I want to protect Jack from everything that is ugly or "grown up" about the world. I don't want to talk about sex. I don't w...When the author's 9-year-old son asked her about suicide, she wanted to change the subject. Instead, she decided to embrace her opportunity.
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Postpartum Depression Is Motherhood Hell

I had postpartum obsessive-compulsive disorder with the birth of my first child in 2001. I know what it feels like to see all the other new moms around you happy and glowing while you feel like a miserable monster. Because of how much it truly sucked...Life pretty much sucks when you have postpartum depression. Our new columnist tells the truth about her miserable start at mommyhood.

Mom Gives Daughter $300 for Facebook Fast

Is it time for your kid to go on a social media diet? Credit: Dan Kitwood, Getty Images
It's a parenting strategy for the social media age. A mom in South Carolina offered her college-age daughter $300 to abstain from Facebook for one month, a...
Student goes on Facebook cleanse for cold hard cash.

Are You a Mompetitor?

There's something about motherhood that brings out the competitor in us. Maybe it's all the advice we get, flung at us from every corner. Maybe it's because we're just so darn proud of the fact that we made a person -- from scratch. Maybe it's...There's something about motherhood that brings out the competitor in us.


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